Perhaps I just have my Alopecia radar on these days, but I swear there are more and more people popping up everywhere with Alopecia lately! For the longest time growing up I never knew anyone else that shared the same condition as me. I felt lonely and wished I had someone to relate to.

What I'd like to know is - when you see a stranger with obvious Alopecia (not just thinning hair, but someone who has tell tale smooth patches, or completely void of hair like me) on the street, in a store etc.

Do you ever speak to them?
Do you strike up a conversation with them?
Why do you or why would you not?

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I was sitting at a red light yesterday in horrible Atlanta downtown traffic and I noticed this bald man waiting to cross the street. I was looking at his head mostly thinking "well if I ever shave mine off I wonder if that is how it will look." I looked more closely and could see the spots where there were no hair follicles. I realized his head did look exactly like mine just shaved. I realized he had alopecia and I got REALLY excited. It was all I could do not to yell out the window. "Hey I got it too, we should talk sometime!" But he was also with a very pretty lady and I thought how inappropriate that would have been. The light changed and I drove on.
Had someone with alopecia reach out to me while at an outing and it was really nice. This semi stranger reached out to me at a potluch and commented on my new haircut being nice. I was straightforward and I mentioned that I didn't have a haircut but had regrowth from something called alopecia. That opened a lot of doors! She mentioned that she was totally bald on top and had been so depressed when it started that she hid for three months. Then she described the purchase of a hairpiece that glues on that she gets redone every few months in a town 2 hours from ours and started going out again. I never would have know her hair was a hairpiece! It was really helpful for both of us to have her reach out to me and start the conversation. Then after we shared our feelings on this we connected in other parts of the potluck party and talked with others about a lot of other things. I think we both found it helpful to share the discussion about alopecia and realize that in this smaller community we weren't alone. And since we seemed to share other interests in common I think we'll get to talk again at future events. I think that having alopecia alone isn't the total connection with others - if you share other interests the connection stays.
I was happy to see this thread, because I saw a little girl with it at our local HS football game. I couldn't keep from looking at her and finally at the end of the game, got up the courage to say something to the family. Yes, she had alopecia, and was just diagnosed this year. She is 2. She looked to have some regrowth. I spoke about my daughter and even showed them her spots. Told them about the internet and NAAF. I hope to see them again. I can see how easy it can become an advocate for alopecia!

Hugs,
Carla
In 2002 I was on my honeymoon, it was a cruise. I was sitting in the hot top across from a man who was bald. I also noticed that he had no eyebrows, eyelashes. When he went over to look at the water I told my husband I thought he had alopecia. I said would you mind if I asked him. He said no.
I went over to him and said can I ask you a personal question? Do you have alopecia? Hesaid yes. I said so do I. We became friendly and keep in touch for a little while. He was from Canada.
I have no problem asking. It's easier to talk about it then.
I've seen a number of people who appear to have alopecia, but I've only ever approached one. That was someone I used to see at a lot of high school sports games. So one day I struck up a conversation with him and I got to the topic of alopecia. The guy said he had been completely bald since being a little kid. He said he didn't know anything about alopecia. All he knew was that he was bald.

As for complete strangers, I don't think I'd ever ask them. Sometimes I wonder if they are chemo patients, which makes me even more hesitant.
I was thinking that I've never seen anyone else with alopecia, then it hit me. I see women with wigs on all the time. I wear a wig now all the time. Some of those women may be like me! Sadly, I'll never know because I wouldn't dare to ask.

I never pay attention to the facial hair of bald men so I don't know whether they're bald by choice or not.

*sigh*

Maybe I'll meet someone like me at my Dr's office. That would be very nice. I would surely strike up a conversation!
I know well the feeling of being lonely because of alopecia. For over the past year or so I became aware of someone, who works in a retail establishment that I frequent, who I suspected may have alopecia. This individual was void of both eyelashes and eyebrows and I thought might be wearing a wig. I would never approach anyone who I believed might be wearing a wig. Most people, I assume, think that their wigs are undetectable, and I would never invade anyone's privacy about such a delicate, highly personal issue. To make this brief, I came out recently about my AA (didn't have much choice, anyway) shaved and now present myself quite bald everywhere. However, I was nervous about entering this retail establishment where this person was employed. I was afraid that my baldness might embarrass him/her. My anxiety turned out to be quite misplaced because when I entered this establishment, the individual in question chose to leave the wig home and was most beautifully bald! Only a few tufts of hair remained but, to me, that was just so brave and wonderful. Wow, a flesh and blood person who looks like me! I smiled, waved and said something to the effect of, "Yup...me too!" This individual nervously smiled back. Not being in a position to talk, I discreetly left a note about Alopecia World and asked if they would like to become a friend. After the fact, I second quessed myself and prayed this person didn't have cancer. Oh well, chemo causes hairloss to and I'm sure the good folks on this site would be supportive. I sincerely hope that I was not intrusive but it was so nice to see someone like me. For a few, brief moments, I was a bit less alone.
You're instinct was probably right Jamie. I've known two people who went through chemo. and neither lost their eyelashes or eyebrows. I wouldn't say anything to anyone whom I suspected of wearing a wig...I figure, they're wearing it because they feel better not letting the world see their condition, and maybe they don't want people to know. I wear a wig and have worn one every day since I lost my hair at age 8. Not until recently have I really felt less alone...first, I joined a couple of support groups,...that helped..and second, I had lunch with a group of alopecian New Englanders...I felt at home, relaxed and so NOT alone. It was pretty great.
A few years ago I was in a Pub and saw a young guy (id say late 20s) he had know hair and NO EYEBROWS that was a dead giveaway it wasnt just male patterned baldness, havin a few bevvies in me i strolled up to him and asked him straight "do you have alopecia?" he gave me a funny look and said yeah why, I then told him so did i he looked confused as i had a wig on, so i moved my wig a bit to prove it!!! haha he was laughing and was saying WOW ive never met anyone with it before, haha we had a great night dancing and chatting (and i got a few drinks bought for me hehe hehe)
Never saw him again though
I think we should have a secert handshake haha
The situation i was in meeting a fellow alopecian was ok because we had both had a few drinks and were in a crowded pace where strangers chat, If i was in a supermarket and i saw a fellow alopecian with 3 kids running riot, beans in one hand and cat food in another and a loaf of bread balanced on there chin then NO i wouldnt go up to them and say hi do you have alopecia???
There is a time and a place, I personally woud love to meet fellow alopecians and would not mind at all someone approaching me.

I work at the local hospital one day i was in the oncology clinic, cancer patients come to have chemo, one lady had just had her first session of chemo and she was saying how worried she was about losing her hair, so i told her where i got my wigs from (she was shocked, she never realised it was a wig) which i hope made her feel better about wearing wigs i think people still think they look "wiggy" when in actual fact they look great and you dont have to style them,colour, WASH everyday, in fact if my hair does grow back im gonna shave it off again ha ha
i agree i think there is more alopecia about , either that or i just notice it more.
I am currently au and wear a wig and i would say 99% of people haven't got a clue about my alopecia unless i told them.
I don't as a rule speak to other people with alopecia ( unless i already know them lol) just because i feel that the only thing we would have in common would be our alopecia. They may be out with family or friends and maybe wouldnt want a complete stranger coming up to compare bald patches lol.
Hi Everybody,
I wasnt sure where to post this but this looks like a good spot.

So, Leo and I are at IKEA today and who do I see....A guy with AU. Probably 20 something years old. Leo and I both looked at each other and said "He has alopecia" So we are practically face to face but he wouldn't make eye contact. I passed by him again and gave a little hello gesture but he still wouldnt engage. I figured I tried but I didn't want to go any further and seem like a Stalker.
It was kinda fun for me.

Jeffrey
My daughter and I just met a wonderful family through this site. Her daughter and mine have alopecia. It was great to talk to someone in the same situation and I know my daughter appreciated the contact too. I have introduced myself to adults and teenagers who have alopecia and explained our situation. so far, fortunately, we have had success. The teenagers have been absolutely great to Lauren and the adults have been postive. So,I hope our success encourages people. As a parent it is so good for Lauren to have alopecia role models -to see that she is normal just like them.

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