My fiancee has found out she has female pattern alopecia about 1 year ago. Her hair is shedding quickly. She seems to be coping well but I fear for the medium/long term consequences. i would like some support to guide me through the next steps.
Hi jfsawyer- Try being a good listener, letting her tears fall on your shoulder. This may become very tiring because we tend to become obsessive about our hair...but, this is a very painful period for her. The hair may all fall out, leaving her bald, OR, the hair may continue to shed but then come back. She may find herself desperately seeking a cure. If all the hair is lost, your fiancee will need to become a new person which will take time. If you just continue to support her, reminding her that you love her...no matter what the outcome, it will help but she may vent anger periodically at you. Basically, no matter what you say at that point may only make the situation worse. Perhaps joining a support group will help both of you. At the NAAF conference every year (in Washington DC this year), there is a special support group session for "couples" as the hair loss can be a difficult time for the relationship. It's hard to love someone else when we don't love ourselves...and hair loss can cause this in even the strongest people. (If the hair loss is permanent, a vacuum wig may be the answer for her; today's hair pieces are easy to wear and, honestly, very few people can detect them.) Thank you for your special attention to her situation!!!! Many hugs and future happiness to both of you...Susan
Susan Innes
Oct 31, 2011