Alopecia World
www.alopeciaworld.com
27 and covered up
Well, here it goes. The support. This is my first post--first public discussion.. I have determined, after having Alopecia since I was 4 - it has owned me. I've allowed it to limit me in ways that myself-a strong woman- should never do...I am 27 and I have never been in public without a wig or a beanie. I am ashamed...i don't know why. The looks.. The stares. I don't want to be identified by my baldness..."hey, here comes the bald girl..."...I want to be known for my incredible personality that I have developed over the years to way make up for m lack of conventional outer beauty. I don't have the balls. I am so ashamed I have not let even my parents see me bald...not since I lived at home. I'm frustrated with myself...swimming is a chore...motorcycle rides, the summers in Maine. I always feel like I'm hiding. I am the manager of a bar, so my looks alone are workplace valuable---I do not work at Abercrombie by any means...would I get fired? I just....want to be myself. I just joined Alopecia World. I am reading about everyone's "big moments of acceptance"...wonder when mine will. I am not ashamed that I have Alopecia...I am woried about how brutal people will be...like...opening up a new world that takes away my anonimity that i have created with blending in with a hat and a hood...to sticking out...explaining..."no I do not have cancer"...to those so bold as to ask me whats wrong. I am fine. just...scared. I feel so beautiful as I am. Its tasking others to accept this "unconventional" beauty that scares me. I am worried that it will be limiting...and freeing at the same time. I have some roots, and no roots. It looks funny...I shave it so my head looks like a cow hide/world map; if it were all bald it would be one thing...but its not. its mottled. I had had 3 full cycles of hair loss/growth in my lifetime. I just...want to accept this.
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Cheryl on
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Wow...totally disagree with Lee as well! How could someone comment like that on an alopecia site?? That sounds like someone who maybe could be jealous of those that are free from the umcomfortable.
I am betting that Lee does not go without a bra as well???
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Permalink Reply by R0BB on
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LOOK - Why dont you gals take off your bras AND wigs and let me be the judge .... ???
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Permalink Reply by Brenda Sanders on
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YOU NEED TO GET A LIFE.You don't seem to have alopecia from the looks of your picture. Who are you to judge people that do have alopecia? What does taking off bras have to do with anything anyhow. Wake up and smell the roses.
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Permalink Reply by Tallgirl on
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Brenda, I believe this photo is of actor Gary Busey. Robb's real photo is on his profile page.
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If it is him, he's a real assh--e. I feel sorry for him, doesn't he have anything better to do than rag on people that have alopecia? What does he have that we don't see ,that could be made fun of, not that I would waste my time doing that. He needs to be constructive, not destructive in others lives. I thought when you were a movie star you'd be a shining example to all. If that is supposed to be it, let me stop looking up to these people. Let me not forget that they are only human, humans that make some of the biggest mistakes. We wouldn't want any angels around when he is there.
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It's easy when you're surrounded by people who look and feel the same as you do. Like a mutual admiration society.
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Permalink Reply by Brenda B on
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Nothing about having alopecia is easy. The reason this site is important is because MOST people with alopecia are not surrounded by people who look or feel the same as us. It is called support and many people are living with the fear of losing their hair and the horror of watching it slowly depart. Your opinion is valid and one probably shared by others. I wear wigs, hats, nothing...basically when i go out the door it is whatever I'm feeling. People without alopecia think the worse thing in the world that could happen would be to lose your hair. Coming on here let's you see that people can live and be themselves and everyone deserves self-acceptance. This is not a 'mutual admiration society'. I do have much admiration for people who have had life alterning change in their appearance and carry on with dignity and love of self. I read somewhere a quote that said...'if YOU are bothered by my bald head...whose problem is it??' As far to be bald or not to be...I respect anyone who is able to get up, look in the mirror and live your life...hair, hat, bald...world map (i got that one)
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Permalink Reply by Emily Naples on
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Amen to that Brenda.
I do remind myself OFTEN that there are worse things than Alopecia. I could have cancer. I could be missing an arm. In those thoughts, I imagine myself without an arm or a leg, and try to imagine a lifetime of hardships associated with that; explaining to people, learning to re-function, being "the girl with no arm"...I imagine telling myself, "hey...Atleast I'm not dead."
I am reminded of my art history studies in school, and of the VENUS statues, from the paleolithic era...these were small stone carved statues that were sort of like portable idols - beauty in the eyes of paleolitlic man was of plump women, big breasted and wide hips. No hair was on these statues - . Its amazing how our views change through the ages, and so exponentially in this modern time. Even with the population reaching 7 BILLION, some people are raised to ignore and poke at difference. How can 7 Billion people all be the same?? It boggles my mind, to see this quick shift in only the lifetime of Lee, in that beauty ideals have so rapidly accelerated into something so UNREAL, so unattainable( from the natural beauty of Monroe and Raquel to plastically altered movie stars )...and yet at the same time, sub culture (as opposed to popular-culture beauty) extends to be so accepting of all forms off beauty. Lee's generation was not AS exponentially progressive as this one that im in. There is such a clash, and those with Alopecia are stuck in the middle of this weird cultural acceptance thing...i think. I wonder what the future of acceptance will be maybe like...3 generations ahead...
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