My alopecia areata started when I was 11 years old & in the 7th grade. My mom noticed some bald spots on the side of my head and just assumed it was apart of my hair line, until more & more spots showed up. We then went to a doctor, who had me take many blood test, thinking I had thyroid problems. After we got my blood work results the doctor told me I had alopecia areata, which at the time I had absolutely no idea what it was. He then prescribed me to use this medicated gel on my bald spots, which did not work at all. My mom and I just assumed the AA would go away and we just went on with our lives. We were wrong.. Bald spots grew larger and larger on my head, and people were asking question after question. Anytime I went anywhere people stared, and asked my mom questions, asking if I was sick or if I just pulled out my hair. Being a little, carefree 11 year old girl like me and other girls are, I didn't really acknowledge the stares or questions. But until girls my age started making comments to me the AA really started to get to me. This is when I was 12. When MySpace was popular back in the day, girls started commenting on my pics calling me ugly and baldie, and saying how no one thinks I'm pretty, stuff like that. I started to feel very insecure so my mom and I bought a hair piece that we had to sew on the top of my head. I also started going to an amazing dermatologist that I still go to this day. She started giving me cortisone shots in my head, and cream to apply to my spots. I remember the first time I received the shots I was terrified of the idea of a needle going in my head,but it wasn't as bad as I thought, and I've gotten used to it. Most of 8th grade my hair was doing good, with a few bald spots here and there, but mentally I was doing good. I had a good circle of supporting friends and since my hair grew back I felt better. My freshman year of high school was definitely a very hard year for me dealing with AA. A new school, new people, etc. It stressed me out a lot and I didn't and still don't do well with stress. During freshman year my bald spots were coming back dramatically and whenever I'd brush my hair or just run my hand through it many many strands of hair came out and it made me feel absolutely terrible. I missed weeks of school because I was depressed and afraid to face people with how I looked. It got so bad that I transferred to a charter school, where you go once a week for an hour and teach yourself at home. That year I was also diagnosed with depression, which made the situation even harder for me. On Valentines Day that year I was just observing myself in the mirror for a while and grew so so so frustrated with myself that I grabbed a pair of scissors and just started snipping away. I think that I was so mad that I didn't even know what I was doing. After cutting my hair to a some-what Mohawk look I just decided to get rid of it all and had my dad shave my head. It was very strange feeling shaving my head, I sorta felt like part of me was freed. I wish everyone was bald & there was no such thing as hair so we could all just feel accepted and at ease.. Due to me having a newly bald head and not wanting to go out in public like that my grandma and I purchased my first synthetic wig. Good thing it didn't cost much because I absolutely hated it. It looked a little too perfect, a little too shiny and too volumized. The definition of fake. Also it was very itchy. We then decided to purchase a real human hair wig, and I was shocked on now much it was! Who knew a head of hair was worth that much. But I realize that it was totally worth it because once I put it on I felt like I looked beautiful for once and my esteem went up automatically. My biggest fear was though that someone would accidentally pull it off or that the wind would have it fly off. I live next to the beach and I'm a really beachy person,and having a wig made it hard for me. I hated the feeling of beach hair in my wig so I refused to go to really public beaches with a lot of people, and only went to more private beaches, with people who knew of my AA, and with a beanie on. Before I started my sophomore year at a private Catholic school I bought a new wig in a way to begin a new change. I got a long, light brown wig and I loved it. I was determined that that year would be my year. Starting school at my new school was so much fun and I loved it. I played water polo (took my wig off in the bathroom and put a swimming cap on) and made a lot of new friends. I felt like my life was turning around for the better. In the beginning of the second semester though people began to be suspicious of my hair, and there were rumors going throughout the school that I had cancer. People would stare at me and would always ask my friends if I wore a wig. This really bothered me, and took me down another spiral. I know there could've been worse rumors about me, and that having a rumor like that about me isn't necessarily a bad thing but it still really bothered me. I then again felt very insecure and didn't know what to do. When I went back to my monthly dermatologist appointment she prescribed me to prednisone. Prednisone was the worst, it made me feel sick all the time and very weak. I honestly don't even think it helped whatsoever. Prednisone is a medication that you must ALWAYS take and not change the schedule of the taking because if so it can cause very bad damage to your body and you could possibly die.I became so depressed that I was at the point that I didn't care if I took the pills or not anymore and stupid me just stopped taking them. Once my parents and dermatologist realized I stopped they rushed me to the ER to see if I was ok. After that incident my dermatologist took me off Prednisone and from then on I have been taking biotin and prenatal pills daily. When sophomore year ended and summer began I decided to no longer where my wig. I felt such relief, and was way more relaxed, and I could finally move my neck! Haha. my natural brown hair was a little past my chin and I just told people I got a haircut. I still had my bald spots but they were less noticeable and way more hidden. It is now my junior year and my hair passes my shoulders. Unfortunately my bald spots are back and are getting worse as I type this right now. Alopecia areata just likes to travel around my head and I don't know why. Don't get me wrong I am thankful to God that my baldness isn't due to having cancer, and that my hair has grown back, but it still really hurts, and makes me feel low about myself. I have trouble dealing with the AA, with stress and with my appearance. I hope one day I can develop the attitude of not caring so much of what others think and being more confident in myself. 5 years of AA have been a complete loopy loop roller coaster, and I know it won't end, but I hope I grow to accept it. I hope you found my journey somewhat inspirational or something to relate to,and I'd love to talk to others about how they deal with alopecia or about their journey as well. Thank you :)