Hey Everyone,

I'm 46. I got AA at 11-12, and AU by age 14-15. I got a wig when I was about 16. I've gotten a new wig every few years, but have never deviated too much from what my natural color was when I was 14 or so, before I lost my hair. I was blond then, and my wig now is a light brown. I got the most recent one about 9 months ago and went a little darker, but it's still a very light brown or dark blond.

I obviously never shave, so my face is quite smooth: there's no buildup of years of nicks and shaving scars. I'm also very fair skinned. I don't bother with eyelashes or eyebrows.

So I look, apparently, a lot younger than I really am. Most of the time it's just funny. A few weeks ago, I was at a bar with some younger guys from the office. They didn't card some of them (who were in their 20s), but they not only carded me, they made me take the driver's license out of the plastic see-through sheet in the wallet and hand it to them. No one else had to do that.

But my wife is really starting to notice. Yesterday, we were at a restaurant and the waiter apparently said to her, "Who's the youngster?" (waiter was speaking Spanish which I don't speak but my wife does). My wife is two years YOUNGER than me and doesn't look old, and probably looks a little younger than her age. The couple at the next table asked what we ordered, and then the woman said, "And what about your young blond boyfriend?". Finally, a different waiter handed the check to my wife instead of me, and then when I paid, the guy at the next table said something to the effect of that I paid and wasn't that nice.

Anyway, I guess I need to get a darker wig. But do I just sort of do it slowly, or just when I go for my next one do I just go for a lot of gray in the wig? Does anyone else have an issue where people assume you are much younger than you are? I always thought it'd be a good thing, but it was actually quite awkward last night.

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If you can, it might be more comfortable to try to do it gradually - let yourself and others get used to it over time.  If you're wearing a human hair wig, then you can see a colorist to thread in a little gray and then a little more when you want.  If you're wearing a synthetic, you'll want to look for a mix color -- some light brown, some gray.

Probably a totally useless reply, but I have a blond husband who is 46, and while it's true his blond is now pretty dark at the roots, the biggest change is probably in the thickness of his hair, not that you need to go for a balding look, but perhaps wig thinning could help. My husband doesn't have gray hair yet, and my mother-in-law is in her 70s and not going gray, though her blonde is now fairly brown. As a female I just wonder when my face will start to look too old for "young" hair.

Maybe if you add eyelashes and eyebrows you would look older. I bet you have a young spirit to go along with your hair, which always brighten up your face...and that's a good thing. Enjoy the compliments!

Just went to get a beer and some food after work. Was alone. Got carded. Here's a pic. Seriously, do I look like I'm under 20? I don't think so...

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