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Alopecia universalis, a strange blessing
Hello to everyone! I am in my 60s and have had alopecia universalis my entire life. It's always been easy for me to accept, I think because it's never been any other way for me. Just imagine having had no hair, right from the beginning. I was a baby whose head, birthed from the amino acid primordial soup and broken water, never broke out a hair. Never knew golden-brown locks contrasting with a blue-green dress collar as they first reached them. Never knew muddy dirty hair from camping in the Catskills, green hair from chlorine in public pools, gum in my hair from boys, bob-style hair when it was popular, perms, graying, none of that. I have worn my scalp like a hairdo that never grows out, except when I would wear a head scarf on a beach day, or wigs during a time when I thought I could learn to like them--why didn't I trust my instincts on that one? I was no Loretta Lynn, no Jane Fonda. But I had nice hats, nice lips, a nice laugh. I met my husband and that was that. I wrote for a fashion magazine for 35 years. Two beautiful daughters. Three grandkids. A garden, a summer home in Nantucket. That was that.
If you have had hair and have lost it, you will grieve it. I can't grieve what I've never had, but I can tell you that I mourn what I've never known. Of course I would. Your situation is tougher. You have to make changes, adapt. It is in our nature. You are a stealthy fox when you want to be. I have experienced loss. This site is about loss. Loss can mean death, it can mean a break up, a fire, a failed opportunity. You at least had hair once. And now you're in another phase. A new look. A new you. A second life. You are blessed. You will gain strength in new arenas. You will surprise yourself. No more hair. You'll do fine. You've got one up on me. I never had it to begin with.
If you have had hair and have lost it, you will grieve it. I can't grieve what I've never had, but I can tell you that I mourn what I've never known. Of course I would. Your situation is tougher. You have to make changes, adapt. It is in our nature. You are a stealthy fox when you want to be. I have experienced loss. This site is about loss. Loss can mean death, it can mean a break up, a fire, a failed opportunity. You at least had hair once. And now you're in another phase. A new look. A new you. A second life. You are blessed. You will gain strength in new arenas. You will surprise yourself. No more hair. You'll do fine. You've got one up on me. I never had it to begin with.
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Michelle L on
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Wow - amazing, inspiring words. Thank you!
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Permalink Reply by Christa M. on
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Hi Donna,
thank you very much for your inspiring story, that shows that happy life depends definitely not of hair, but of the beauty EVERY human beeing can have, the inside one and the outside one.
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Permalink Reply by Mary on
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Donna, thank you for sharing your inspiring and eloquent words. I hope many people on AW take your words to heart. We are not our hair, as many of us are slowly learning.
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Permalink Reply by Donna Fargo on
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You're welcome, all, and thanks for reading my story... It's important to me that we help each other see ourselves for how we really are.
Aimee: hats and head scarves. I never could be happy with a wig. It just didn't seem right for me. If I lost it, I couldn't pretend it was back.
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