Competitive swimming

I got alopecia areata when I was six, before that I had the thickest hair, like you could only loop the pony tail band twice. But after that with in a year I had to cut my hair shorter so it would hide all the bald spots. For a while I didn't care because it wasn't bad and I was young, but now that I'm in high school it is. Every day there is something new to stress about, and I don't fit in. I'm in a school were every one know I have some thing wrong with me, and pity me but don't want to come over and ask me about. Some of the few times that they have, they ask if I have cancer. The upside to all of this is that I'm gaining respect from my school because I'm their star swimmer, but at meets everyone takes off their caps and puts their hair in buns and I sit their in mine. Ashamed to take mine off because the bald spots cover my head and when my hair is wet it is worse. Recently I have been completing going bald because I'm basically already there, or should I get a wig? But the problem is that I don't want people to know I'm wearing a wigs so I would have to wear it at my swim practices any suggestions?

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Permalink Reply by Stacie on January 8, 2017 at 11:08am

I'm sorry that you have to deal with hair loss on top of the normal high school stresses -- nothing about high school is easy!  You're kind of "blessed" with a problem here: You're an amazing swimmer, but your talent is actually putting you in a situation where your hair loss may be more evident.  

My first suggestion is this: Look for other swimmers who have suffered hair loss and get in touch with them.  There is a wonderful hair loss dermatologist at UCLA who used to be a competitive swimmer -- her name is Dr. Carolyn Goh.  You can find her email by Googling her.  She embraced a lifestyle in which she goes bald all the time, and she did that throughout high school and college.  It might be really helpful for you to get in touch and ask her for advice on developing the confidence to do that.  There are other folks like Dr. Goh who have done competitive swimming and decided to reveal and embrace their baldness.

My second suggestion is: Talk to your parents about allowing you to get therapy to work through your hair loss.  Confidence is key, but it's not something that you can just wish for and, poof, there it is.  It takes work to build confidence, and being able to talk to a professional about it may allow you to learn of useful tools and techniques.

My third thought is this: I know it's absolutely the most difficult thing to to believe, but no one in high school thinks that they fit in.  Everyone feels like you.  Truly.  The more confident you are in yourself and the more able that you are to carry yourself without fear, the more comfortable other people around you will be.  Most of the time in life, you have to fake it till you make it.  (Talking to a therapist can really help you work on how to feel okay doing that.)  When you're confident and act secure in yourself, people will simply tend to believe you and go along with you.  

I wish you everything good -- for swimming, for high school, and for life. 

Permalink Reply by Leo on October 24, 2020 at 7:08am

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