I lost all of my hair fifty years ago as a boy and it never grew back. I spent the first few years coming to terms with my loss and bemoaning the fact that I was different, and the remaining period realising and accepting that I wasn't. How we see ourselves, and accept ourselves, is essentially how others reflect back to us.

So how do we see ourselves as 'beautiful' when our pride and joy chokes our sink and hair brush, and the only thing growing new hair is our pillow?

My below comments are not meant to be a universal panacea for handling alopecia as everyone is different. But they were good for me, and I can only speak from my own fifty years experience of the condition.

I personally think that the first thing to do is to truly accept that our hair may never come back, or if it does then it may only pay fleeting visits. In one way losing a finger is arguably easier as gradually one gets used to it and can straight line adapt. A finger isn't going to grow back. With alopecia if one slides into the 'hope trap' such can potentially torment us for years and delay our adjustment and moving on.

Likewise, do not to fall into the wig trap. Such can induce the 'I'm a criminal in hiding' syndrome and make one more self conscious than revealing one's baldness. One can even develop a phobia of umbrellas and gusts of wind. Wigs are hot, sweaty, and disgusting. Particularly if one seriously exercises. How we respond in the initial stages can set up a pattern which later becomes very difficult to break.

Make the best of your scalp: Shave off the remaining tufts of hair and get a good facial / scalp tan. (But first read all of the health / safety warnings and don't sue me if you set yourself on fire or develop skin cancer.)

So, suddenly you have a new image. Now consider if you need to adjust your weight or style of clothes. Whatever makes you feel good about yourself.

Get out and about. Best initially with friends, and don't hide under hats or bonnets unless it's either cold or part of your new image. Never ever slip into hiding. If you do then your character may adversely change.

Strengthen your view of your new self with 'affirmations', meditation, religion or anything else which legally turns you on to your character (the real you) rather than the illusion of your image.

Try not to look back at how you were. If folk generally did that then all the old people in the world would go crazy. They all started off as young beauties, not wrinklies that often shuffle along.

For me personally, don't join support groups unless you are really in a bad emotional place. There are not alopecia suffers, homosexuals, ethnic minorities or any of the other daft labels. There are only people. Everyone is equal and potentially the same. We are all invisible characters / spirits. Labels are never more than hollow labels.

Strangers essentially observe your body mannerisms; listen to your voice; and check out your eyes. Whilst they may glance at your scalp, few will linger there, and their worst impression will be that you are undergoing chemo therapy. If anything that will soften them towards you.

Finally, sorry to go on for so long, any problem / challenge is not our scalps but rather our misconceived thoughts about our scalps. The good news is that usually there's a limited amount of what we can do about our scalps but our thoughts are capable of a total fresh and healthy overhaul.

Best wishes to you all.