Hi all. Haven't posted in a while but I'm back to gripe a little and hopefully get some comforting words from you all. A little background...I'm 36 and have had AA since age 9. In January of '09 I developed auto-immune hives. I was on high doses of anti-histamines as well as an asthma medication to control them. As of a month ago, I have been weaned from all medications and the hives are gone (thank goodness because they were awful!) The weird thing is while I had the hives I grew almost a full head of hair. Maybe it was the fact that my body now had 2 auto-immune disorders to deal with and it prioritized the hives and put the alopecia on the back burner. Maybe it had something to do with the anti-histamines I was taking. Maybe it was just a coincidence. Whatever the reason, my hair was back. Anyway, now that the hives are gone and I am no longer on the meds, I've been experiencing hair loss again. And I've had AA long enough to know the drill and to know what's coming. I can already feel bald spots on the back of my head that weren't there just a few weeks ago. I guess I'm just looking to vent...I hate that this is happening to me all over again. What a tease that I finally grow a full head of hair after 27 years only to have it taken away again! I keep going over and over what might have caused the regrowth…the meds? The hives? I can’t help but think it had something to do with one of or both of these things and now that the hives are gone, my hair is starting to follow. I had such big plans for this summer too…To finally be wigless. To show off my new short hair…MY hair. But now it looks like that isn’t going to happen. I feel so guilty even complaining because I know how much worse I could have it. I know that a disease that’s strictly cosmetic is better than having something life threatening or debilitating. But somehow, today, those words don’t make this suck any less.

Thank you all for reading. I feel better even having vented a little. I’m sure it doesn’t sound like it, but I am really a very upbeat person, I have a wonderful life, and I have truly come to terms with my alopecia. However, today I was just feeling down and sorry for myself because I am just not looking forward to losing my hair again. Especially now that it was all there. I know that if it all comes out again, I will be just fine…like I am every time. I’m just finding it harder this time because I saw, for the first time in my life, what it was like to run my fingers through my hair and feel no smooth spots. I had that privilege for just a few short months, enjoyed it while it lasted, but, nonetheless am sad to see it end. I am so grateful that I have a group like this one to turn to for comfort and advice.

Thanks again,
Jen