Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by Rose Marie' on April 14, 2009 at 2:26pm

Hi

I think what you are feeling is really normal. I often feel the 'hiding it' thing can cause a lot of pain. But everyone handles this condition differently. I don't mean that you have to present yourself without a headcovering (unless of course you want to), but I do feel to be open about this condition goes a long way to heal people. (just my opinion).

Libby my daughter chooses to wear a hairpiece but she also is open about the fact that she has alopecia. This works well for her and like you she really just wants to get on with her life. She often comes to my page and reads what is going on in AW and other sites (she even joined a site the other day), but in reality she feels ok about all this and is more interested at the moment to study and get her bachelors, go out with her friends and do all the stuff an 18 year old should be doing (probably misbehaving - even though best I don't know about that sort of thing LOL).

What I'm trying to say is what you are feeling is way normal.

Rosy

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Permalink Reply by Ursula Hay on April 14, 2009 at 2:56pm

Hi Liz,
No, you are not on your own with this. What you are feeling is quite normal.
Yes, I too wake up every morning and 'hide it' and just go about my day as if nothing is wrong. Oh yes, there are those 'blue' days which we all have where we get upset about the situation and ask ourselves 'why me'???
This is not just because you are a 'teenager', what happens here can be at any age and stage of our lives.
My first siting of AA was when I was 22 years old.........now a good 20 years down the line I have AU.
Have I accepted it you might ask? YES and NO

The YES is that I have eventually chosen to wear a hair piece (prosthetic wig) and continue to live the life as carefree as possible and enjoy some of the outdoor activities I used to.
The NO is that I have not yet openly made Alopecia an awereness in my total surrounding (friends, work collegues, my in-laws). This to me is something I'm only now ready to tackle.

So Liz, as you can see, this could be a long or short process - all depends on invidivial situations.
Hang in there........all I can suggest is talk about it as much as possible.

Ursula

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Permalink Reply by Bobby on April 14, 2009 at 6:51pm

When I was a teenager I thought about it all the time; how could we not? there are reminders all around us, walking by us, talking to us, interacting with us, on a daily bases. Its along the lines of depression, you just cannot get the thoughts out of your mind, and if you try and realize they still wont go away. You might need temporary help if it makes it to where you sleep almost zero, affects your school work, social life etc. If thinking about it doesn't disrupt your life, then I'd say there is nothing anomalistic in your behavior. It will always be around in your mind some place but it will grow distant with time HOPEFULLY :)

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Permalink Reply by Lee on April 15, 2009 at 2:31am

I do this too. Usually, I don't think about it...but sometimes I think about it a lot. I think maybe the longer we have it, the less we wil lthink about it...I hope.

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Permalink Reply by Tallgirl on April 16, 2009 at 11:12pm

I never called wearing anything on my head hiding, because obviously, to anyone around me a lot, I can change hair color, style and length at the drop of a hat, and even go from wig to hat to scarf It is obvious that SOMETHING is going on with my hair. But since I am an artist, I just have fun with the variety and the change, as well as with the images I can project when I need to feel different or get out of a slump. I would be too bored looking the same every day. Artists and actresses thrive on interesting roles and visuals...so we have an excuse to GO FOR IT, alopecia or not!

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Permalink Reply by a. z. on April 21, 2009 at 2:12pm

im a teenager with alopecia. I completely understand the stuff you are going through. Luckily I have great friends and family to help me be strong. I started going to Hair Club which is a lot of money but its something to make me feel like everyone else. I think once you realize that it isn't something that you can control and you get beyond that point you'll be able to move past that.

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Permalink Reply by Jacqui on April 21, 2009 at 5:25pm

Hi Liz,
I lost my hair when I was 17. It's a tough time at any time but in your teens it seems harder.
I'm now 38 and I've spent most of my career working with.....teenagers.....specialising in challenging teens and homeless teens. Throughout all that time I didn't wear a wig and you know what? Those young people never gave me a hard time.
Having hairloss taught me all about compassion, empathy, understanding and it helped me to create a purely magical career. I used it to help others through their issues....and I'd rather have no hair than be homeless and penniless. ;-)
You're certainly not alone and you can go out there and do anything you want to do and be anyone you want to be - with or without hair.
You look beautiful and yes, you'll have shitty days, as we all do, but our hair doesn't define us. Smile big, dream high and go for those goals, whatever they may be. Once people see the real you they won't even think about your hair. I was told that many times and it took a while to believe it. I only just started wearing wigs because I'm now working with young offenders and boy they're TOUGH....but a lot of people asked why and said it wasn't necessary.
Be you, be strong and no, you're never alone....;-)

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Permalink Reply by Yen on May 2, 2009 at 8:01pm

Hi there. I am 23 and I have been recently diagnosed with Alopecia Areata. Though I am not completely bald yet, I am losing a lot of hair and there are just days when I would go to complete panic after combing through my hair and seeing tufts of hair falling out of my scalp. On some days, I would feel completely ugly and would sink into a deep depression. I feel so ashamed about my condition that I cannot even openly discuss it with my parents. Like you, I have no one to talk about this. I never had issues about my confidence and self-esteem before, but Alopecia has dealt me a hard blow. I guess it'll take some time before we can come to terms with it. It's not a debilitating disease in the same way that cancer is. Losing hair is not the same as losing a limb. But sometimes, it's just so hard to remember those things.

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Permalink Reply by Wendy Teo on May 8, 2009 at 1:12pm

Wow..many ppl have already responded to your post and everyone has been so encouraging. =) Chin up, girl! You're not alone. I lost my hair at the age of 9 and I'm now 27. Like u, i went thru the horrible teenage yrs and felt upset. Now, i hardly feel bothered over it and I'm rather open abt the fact that i wear a wig. Maybe time helps to erode the most bitter part of it...and kinda takes the edge of my self consciousness. U're pretty without or without hair! =) Right now i'm just on the quest for the "perfect" hair piece... Anybody can help me? I just paid 4k and waited 3 mths for a piece and it arrived today. But i am sorely disappointed. The quality is terrible and totally not worth the price + wait. =(

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