Alopecia World
www.alopeciaworld.com
Ostracism
Looks like my 4 year old girl is being ostracized by some kids because of her alopecia. She herself is not aware yet that her problem with hair is a problem. How would you suggest I handle this issue? Thank you!
Replies to This Discussion
-
Permalink Reply by Susi on
-
Don't make her hide. Not herself by homeschooling nor her head by trying to cover it up with a wig (I know these suggestions were meant to help). Hiding is an escape, not a solution - and a dangerous one as she would always worry about being discovered.
Make her strong and proud of herself. We are all different from one another for various reasons. Hair is hers.
-
-
thank you all for your replies, your kind words, and advice! I trully appreciate each a d every input, which will help me address the situation. I also do not think that at this age could act like this based on a malicious intent, although their parents could be telling them not to play with her. Either way it hurts, again,, thank you all so much!
-
Permalink Reply by youarebeautiful on
-
Find children's book about bullying and/or alopecia. I like the protective factor of homeschooling, but in the long run, it is good to live in the 'real world.' I think that mom can decide how long she wants her daughter to deal with this in a public school. Maybe decide a few years of homeschooling and a few years in public school---but it has to be mom's decision.
-
-
Jeff Woytovitch of CAP just published a book recently about his daughter Maddie - called "Maddie, Teaching Tolerance WithASmile". That might be a good starter...
-
Permalink Reply by Lisa Santer on
-
I like lots of the suggestions and resources folks have offered. You wrote, "She herself is not aware yet that her problem with hair is a problem." That's very interesting. Some people argue there is no such thing as disability, just problems with how society makes room for people. I think that's extreme. I also think it points in a useful direction. Many of our problems with how our heads look are about how society teaches us (especially women) we should look and what we should do to look like that.
Perhaps her hair isn't a problem to her now. There's a good chance that it's less of a problem to her than it is to you--naturally as you're her protective parent. I'd suggest you do 3 things: 1) gather resources for your daughter and you; 2) follow her lead in how you treat her and the other kids; and 3) spend some time processing what the loss of your daughter's hair means to you. You have every right to grieve your loss. I believe doing so helps us all live fuller lives.
-
-
thank you, that's very insightful! I did not make peace with this loss, I know that, and I'm dreading the time when she realizes what she doesn't have, but I'm very scared of her being mistreated because of AA and her becoming aware of that. I hope I can make her strong in being able to face that.
-
Permalink Reply by Brandy on
-
If this is happening in a pre-school, immediately notify the management and demand that they educate the children about treating people who look different with respect. If your daughter wants to wear a wig or hat, that is fine. If not, also fine. Teach her to respect who she is. Nobody should be forced to wear a wig, even little kids.
Hope this helps. One of the happiest days of my life was when I discovered that I could survive in the world by wearing a head scarf instead of a hair piece.
- ‹ Previous
- 1
- 2
- Next ›
© 2024 Created by Alopecia World.
Powered by
