Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by Rose Marie' on October 1, 2013 at 8:21pm

Hi

Scarfs are a lovely option...there is a lady here that makes the beau beau scarfs..very pretty.

I understand this can seem so terribly overwhelming and cause terrible concern.

My advise is if you feel more like yourself and comfortable in a scarf, by all means wear one. You may be questioned about what is going on with your new look. But as long as you are prepared with some stock answers I feel this could work well for you.

Good luck with your decision and possibly your new scarved look.

Rosy

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Permalink Reply by purplemainst on October 2, 2013 at 7:16am

Thanks Rose Marie. I spent some time talking about how a scarf makes me feel better. While the hair piece made me look more as a I used to look, it did not make me feel better. Physically uncomfortable and self conscious. This is going to be a difficult road, isn't it.

Thanks to all for being here.

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Permalink Reply by Rose Marie' on October 2, 2013 at 2:58pm

It's never and easy road when dealing with alopecia, but it can be sorted for most with a little thought about what they really want to do. Alopecia never goes away...it is a life time condition, but most find great alternatives for themselves and get out doing their life again. You are going to find your way.

Rosy

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Permalink Reply by purplemainst on October 3, 2013 at 8:04am

Thanks to everyone. I am hating this. Hated the scarf too, but I guess I am still accepting the giant bald spot and no hairline on my head. One second I want a wig, the next I don't

I just recently started to face this issue, really lived in denial about my hair loss. It's been happening so long, but was always able to hide it and now that's not possible. I am so lost and don't know what to do. I am grateful to find this site and know I am not really alone, although that is how I feel.

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Permalink Reply by Rose Marie' on October 3, 2013 at 2:31pm

Hi

Your not alone. I understand that you feel it. Keep reaching out and expressing your worries. This is really like a grieving process....sometimes you will feel ok and others you won't. Keep working out your own needs and you will resolve these things for yourself.

Take care

Rosy

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Permalink Reply by carol on October 17, 2013 at 1:57pm

I feel like you do but my loss is more and starting all over my head. What I did is I bought some scarves, hats and a wig. Started just wearing them at home first to get a little more comfortable. The plus side of wearing something on my head is that I don't look at my bald patches in the mirror all the time. I also prayed all the time for this to stop but when I asked God to do whatever his His will and help to cope with it I felt better and I may not like whats happening but Im not depressed all the time. I also have been letting my friends know whats happening and then I don't feel like I have to hide. I hope this might help you.

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Permalink Reply by Magdalene on November 4, 2013 at 3:17am

I´m bald since about 15 years, I wore wigs for a year in my early twenties, but for different reasons I didnt feel comfortable with them, so I ditched them. Now I wear scarves, I ´ve got about twenty of them, in different colors and styles and I like to tie them differently. I rarely go bald in public, exept doing sports like swimming, but ,for me, the scarves are like in-between going public and hiding my AT. Sometimes people ask about chemo, and I tell them, for me itś OK. In a way, wearing a scarf is an invitation to ask which doesn´t mean that one is obliged to explain for everyone.

And one personal  thing; I assume and hope this is not the case for you: I went AT in my late teens, and my family was really opinionated about how I should cope with it. I was ashamed of my AT, and unfortunately, my family didn´t help me to accept it, but pushed (encouraged?) me to wear wigs to look as "normal" as possible as well as they diminished the inpact of the At of my life. The fact is  Alopecia changes your look; no matter how I disguise it, I still have no eyelashes, eyebrows or other body hair. And anything that changes the way you look, has an impact on the way you feel about your self. Being pushed into "normality" prolongued my coping-process with many years and made me feel ashamed of me due to a health-condition wich wasn´t my fault in any ways. I cant say I´m proud of my AT (why should I), and sometimes I do dislike it, but itś a part of me, just like my eye colour or shape of my fingers, and itś been a part of the process thatś made me to the person I am, right now. Currently a bald nursing-student wearing scarves in hospitals.  And I like myself.

So discuss with your sister, she has the right to an opionion, but decide your self. Thought itś not easy, try to be open about your alopecia with your friends and family and try different styles. And don´t avoid mirrors!

Love,Magdalene 

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Permalink Reply by suz54 on November 4, 2013 at 5:35am

i am going through chemotherapy and have lost my hair. i love scarves. one can be imaginative how to wear them. i am gypsy one day and a persian princess the next, a jewish lady or an arabian one the next., etc, etc. it is alright if people think you are going through chemo. it is not shameful. the more important thing is you look good and you feel good.... whether you choose wigs or scarves.

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