Alopecia World
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Son with alopecia
My son is 12 years old and in the 7th grade. He has had Alopecia since he was around 8. We have been able to "hide" the spots because he did have a very thick full head of hair in the beginning. He grew his hair longer to hide the spots well now there is no "hiding". He is being teased severely at school and today He actually got into a physical fight with another student at school. I live in Georgia and am trying to find a support group. I have not contacted the doctor as of yet about the support group because this incident happened today. I want my son to meet people that are also going through this because I can sympathize and hurt along with him but I do not actually KNOW what it is like to have to deal with this. This group seems like it will be very helpful to me but I need to find him some help too. I don't think a wig is an option for a boy? He still has his eyebrows and lashes so far. We have done steriod creams and foams. He does not want to get the injection shots that were recommended by the dermatologist and I will NOT force him to do any treatment that he doesn't feel comfortable doing. I am so thankful that alopecia isn't a physical pain but wow how emotional to go through. Thanks for letting me vent, look forward to your suggestions.
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by BaldGirlsDoLunch.org on
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A stellar resource for you and your son is CAP
childrensalopeciaproject.org
Director, Besty Woytovich, will respond quickly. They have a box of books to donate to your child's school. Their materials for empowering kids are up to date and age appropriate. The best is that you'll get to talk and email with Betsy who has a child with alopecia and she can make personal recommendations for other moms you can connect with in addition to the many wonderful ones here on AW.
CAP4U@verizon.net is her email.
It's a bumpy road, but it does get better. In my experience with kids, boys are not generally in the mood to go to meetings, so you might just show him the website of CAP and leave materials that he can look at on his own without feeling pressured to please his parents because they are worried about his adjustment. 8th grade is so hormonal that it's a tough year without alopecia in the picture. He might decide that it's cool to look bald and decide to shave his head and just tell everyone " I can't grow hair" this is what I have, it's called AA. Let it be his call. The website headblade.com has dozens of photos of bald guys of all ages...famous and not so famous...you might see someone he can relate to on there. It's not child centered, but he might see someone he looks up to.
It will get better....the beginning is the hardest.
Thea
baldgirlsdolunch.org
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Permalink Reply by Joshua on
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Hi Alison,
Thanks for your post. I wanted to reply in length but I only have 10 minutes left before my lunch break ends. Anywhere, I would like to refer you to a link "Wont Go to School"- from Susan.
She has a 12 y/o son with Alopecia Areata. (From NSW, Australia). I strongly believe that she may be able to relate to your situation better than I do. The link "Wont-Go-School" posted by Susan, which I also replied, Hopefully it will be able to provide an insight (generally not specifically) of what a 12 y/o boy with alopecia has to deal with.
Below are some of my quotes from my reply to Susan about her 12 y/o son Jon. recently:
"Your son needs to tell someone what possibly could have happened in school that might have embarrassed him terribly or even being called names in the public (especially in front of girls). I always try to "tackle" particular issues along with the bigger picture which is coping with alopecia is school and the public. Coping with alopecia at high school is often a very "awful" journey as one hit a very high level of self consciousness and seeking acceptance from peers are among the those occupy a teenage mind the most."
AND
"I personally believe that everyone has their own individual avenue of sharing or venting their problems to others. My concern would be when one start coping and facing the problem him/herself alone, likely a prelude to poor choices (depression, anti-social, bad influence, smoking, alcohol...etc.) Don’t freak out on what I have just said, just continue to be yourself as a parent to continue to love your son as himself, not because of his alopecia. A warm loving family environment that respects his choice and embraces his friends while supporting him through prayers, faith and in action."
I wish that I have more time to reply to your post specifically. Take care and do keep us updated.
God bless.
jt
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Thank you for your reply and glad that Andrew is feeling much better now. Generally alopecia does make a person stronger and more courageous and of course a more matured thinking. Just let Andrew know that he doesnt need to deal with this alone, especially emotionally and mentally. Enjoy his student life, play sports if he likes sports, join the science club if he loves science...etc and excel in them. Bald people can not only do normal things but can also do great things. All the best and God bless.
jt
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