Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by rj, Co-founder on January 5, 2009 at 12:15pm

I'll keep my reply somewhat brief because there has been quite a bit of discussion about these matters -- here and here, for example -- on AlopeciaWorld.com.

I agree wholeheartedly with John on this one, though I must add that I'm certainly not to be counted amount "the vast majority" of men Mari has encountered. Although my fiancee, Cheryl, has always been altogether lovely to me, neither her alopecia or her preferred bald look has been the main or basic reason I'm attracted to her and love her so. Neither is an issue per se when it comes to any aspect of our love life, but if it were, Cheryl would have good reason to to be as concerned as Mari.

So no, Mari, you are not being "too sensitive." And yes, Mari, you should want to be with a man whose more into you than the prurient possibilities he sees in/on your alopecic or bald head. But don't let such shallow men get you down; you encounter them so often because most men -- and most women -- take shallow and silly approaches to their so-called intimate relationships. The key is to not only wait patiently for your Mr. Right, but to also make sure that your own maturity and growth has prepared you to recognize and appreciate a truly good man who's truly a man of substance.

Permalink Reply by josh on March 26, 2009 at 3:34pm

Hi, I do not want to offend you, but I guess being bold does not have anything to do in the intimacy. There are to many factors before that in a relationship that boldness could affect. If a man notice your boldness until you are in bed....then he just was just looking for some....and men who do that does not care if you are bold or not...

Permalink Reply by Nicole Mosley on April 23, 2009 at 2:13am

Thanks Josh :) This helps!

Permalink Reply by Nicole Mosley on April 23, 2009 at 2:11am

"There is no excellent beauty that hath not some strangeness in the proportion." ~ Francis Bacon

Permalink Reply by Ted Michael Morgan on May 29, 2010 at 5:39pm

I have never been intimate with a woman with alopecia though I have known women with the condition. I doubt that a lover's hair or lack of hair would be that great a factor for me in any intimate relationship. Love and romance work at many levels. I have found the bald look attractive for at least 40 years, but I don't look for bald women to date. These mattes work in subtle ways.

Mari's photographs on her profile reveal a pretty woman whom I find very attractive. Is that my fetish for bald women at work? Probably, but, in a way, so what? I would not exploit her and I assume she is strong enught to see through manipulations of men who would exploit her. I do think that people with a bald fetish--heck know--do come here to look. Is that harmful? Well, yes and no. Life is complex.

What happens here, however, is positive for members of the community that suffers from alopecia (and I know that it is not something anyone wished to have to wanted to have), but there are worse fates.

Everyone has little sexual roadmaps. Just don't press them to the point of violating another human beings's wellness and esteem. I most certainly don't want to be with someone because of some prurient possibilities. In other words, though we all are possible victims of such interests, most human beings are all also possible lovers with a keen for healthy intimach.

Permalink Reply by JimB on April 18, 2011 at 7:43pm

I for one do not look at a woman's hair, nor other body parts. I look at her, what is in her heart, her mind, how she works around others, how she dresses, cares for her self, and more important what she thinks of me.

A woman with hair is the same as a woman without hair. There is nothing that puts them apart, not even hair.

If they are not their self then they are not their self. Hair has nothing to do with being a woman, nor who you are.

When a woman without hair opens her eyes in the morning, she sees the same thing a woman with hair sees ..... Her self and a crazy World around her.

So, seeing a woman without hair as something more sexual is to say the World is "flat".

Would I be seen with a woman without hair, why not. What is it which sets her apart from a woman with hair. Is she no less a woman, does she do things differently, does she act differently, do she feel differently, does she love, does she care differently ..... NO ..... NO ..... NO ..... NO ..... NO .....

She is no different than a woman with hair. It is only her who makes the decision not the man is out with.


JimB

Permalink Reply by Gary on April 18, 2011 at 9:33pm

OK,, You worry that men will not like you bald, you go out with a man that is Ok with you being bald and in fact thinks bald is sexy. Then you say, hey, you must be weird or something. I throw my hands in he air and say screw it, you are impossible.

Permalink Reply by Jeffrey Alexander Reyes on April 28, 2011 at 12:52pm

To me, if a woman is comfortable enough to take off her wig for you when she probably wouldn't be comfortable taking it off for anyone else, it makes a guy feel important. And every dude wants that. It also shows she isn't afraid to do something different like you said. I don't think the wigs should be a huge problem. It's just another article of clothing to change and incorporate in relations.

Permalink Reply by Weston D on May 9, 2013 at 5:27pm

Well Mari, If a man can accept baldness in a woman then the woman will be viewed like others. What I mean to say is that there sexy fetishes that can be applied to bald women with or with out wigs but don't forget that there are fetishes related to everyone. White, black, asian, indian, short, tall, blonde brunette, and red head. When people look at people they don't know, thinking about their sexual desires, there is a fetish for all people. When one gets to know another then things get personal and compound beyond the base fetish. I put it to you that if a man "doesn't mind," he can justas easily fall for you as he would anyone else.