Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by velvet on December 27, 2011 at 2:25pm

ive left school now and ive found as u get older people arent really that bothered but when i was at 6th form i was bullied and i hated every moment of it. i did however have great friends who knew about it and so were there to support me. at first i didnt tell them that i wore a wig but i did let them know after about a month though some knew from my previous school. i think its easier if u tell them as u dont feel u need to hide and u feel more comfortable. to be honest i am more open with my friends than my family the only one that i will not wear a wig around is my little brother. i dont show my mom i guess its cus i feel it will upset her but i know all she wants to do is support me. i think in time i will show her. when i go away with friends i dont mind not wearing my wig round them and i love it that they accept me for who i am hope u all have people that u can trust xx

Permalink Reply by kaate.leigh on January 3, 2012 at 3:50pm

Hey :) Ive had alopecia for the majority of my life. People in my primary school knew because i wore a bandana then. The girls in my year and my close friends know but i find it hard telling lads. Lads my age dont really understand so i tend not to tell them anymore. Sometimes I feel low but music really helps. Lyrics, poems and song get me through. I am my own person. Unique, natural, wonderful and beautiful iin every single way :)

Permalink Reply by velvet on January 3, 2012 at 5:11pm

thanks kaate for sharing. as a saturday job i work at a pizza place and theres me and one delivery woman and we r the only females. either the guys dont know about my wigs or they dont mention it i think guys are embarresed to mention it and i think if u spoke to them they wud understand it. guys tbh i find dont do the bullying (well not compared to girls ) hugs gd luck for starting back at school or college this week or next xx

Permalink Reply by Marie on January 5, 2012 at 3:19pm

I got alopecia when I was in primary school, only a couple of months before I was going to secondary school. My friends at that time, like everybody else, including myself, had no idea what was wrong with me, when I out of the sudden was loosing long locks of my blonde hair.

Most of the kids at school, thought I had some weird, deadly disease, which others could catch if they were near me. And since neither me, my parents of my docotrs knew what was wrong with me, I couldn't contradict with the kids at school.

That lead to me loosing some of my best friends, because they were scared.
I still got some of the friends from primary school though. Luckily.

By the time I'd started secondary school, I'd already gotten a lot of wigs.
So, at the first day of a new school, most people thought it was my real hair.

Some years have gotten by, and I'm still wearing and ordering wigs that looks like the first ones,
so no one wil notice. I'm a coward, I know. But I kinda like it this way.
Now, no one is whispering behind my back, no one is spreading rumours I have cancer, or giving me those "ugly looks", when they're stearing and wondering what is wrong with me.

although some of my current best friends, who I wouldn't loose for anything, don't know I'm bald,
I have no plans telling them. Some of them already know from primary school, and some have noticed that I have no eyelashes at all. So yeah... "living a life in secret" I guess :p

Permalink Reply by velvet on January 5, 2012 at 7:29pm

sorry that u have to live in secret do u have any hair underneath, how do u keep ur wigs on?? i think if u did tell ur best friends then it wud b a lot easier. if ur wig did ever come off at school in pe or anything then at least they wud be there to support u and it wudnt be as hard. its up to u tho whether u tell them and i am sure in time u will become more confident and be able to tell them. when i have a wig change its always different and becuase every1 knows they dont say anything other than if it looks nice. i think having people know is a comfort as if it doesnt look right in the day you can always adjust it and u can ask them for opinions. these are just my thoughts

all the best for this new year at school

remember u can get in touch with me anytime xxx

Permalink Reply by Marie on January 6, 2012 at 10:53am

thank you Velvet. No, I don't got any hair underneath, I've got universalis, so no hair at all.

Well, the wigs I get, is made special for my head. When I'm ordering a new one, they're measuring my head, and send the measurements to the people who make my wigs.
My wigs are great! But also VERY expensive. Thanks to the Norwegian Welfare Organisation, I get a new wig every third month! :)

Yeah, I'm probably gonna tell them sometime... Just.. not yet :p

Permalink Reply by velvet on July 4, 2013 at 11:44am

You are not a coward , the fact that you get up and go to school as try and lead a 'normal' (even tho there's no such thing as normal) life is great and over time if you have a partner then you will hopefully be able to talk to them and will have the confidence to walk around without a wig :) message me if you want a chat or add me on Facebook my name is velvet Cooke x

Permalink Reply by Jackie on January 10, 2012 at 6:51pm

hi. Im jackie, im new. c: and i really need to talk to people that go through what i go through. So on that note: coping. Its tough for me actually. I lost all my hair when i was only 4 years old. I wore bandanas in elementery school, and kids would always try to look underneath and see if i had hair under there. It was really annoying. When I was in second grade, i took off my hat in front of my classroom and it felt like a relief. A weight off my shoulder, you know? 2 years after that, i got a Locks Of Love hairpiece and i wore that. I only told 4 people about my condition. But i never took of my hairpiece. Idk why, i guess that now that im older, my 'looks' mean more to me now than when i was younger. Tbh, kids used to call me the 'cancer girl'. It hurt, but they didn't know better. So i can't hate them for assuming. Today, Im a freshie in high school, and i still wear my Locks of Love hairpiece. Yesterday, my hairpiece fell off in the lunch room. I was devasted. My friends all looked up in shock, since they didn't know. Luckily, my best friend Nadi threw her sweater on my head to keep it from view and she and I ran to the bathroom. My other friend Betzy brought me my hairpiece. I was sooo scared. I almost threw up. I literally wanted to hide forever and be home-schooled. My friends, Nadi and Betzy, didn't judge me though. They stood with me in the stall and hugged me...without my hairpiece. They still loved me. I felt so much better that i finally let them in the part of my life that only my family knows. Still, in the back of my head, i was thinking: Did someone see? Will they laugh? What would other people think? Today, i went to school and no body questioned me and no body stared at me. It was like nothing happened. I finally took control over alopecia. And im so much happier. c: Im still kinda scared if this guy saw, but im not going to worry about it. lol Sorry that it's soo long, but i had to get that off my shoulder. c:

Permalink Reply by BTB (John) on January 11, 2012 at 4:12am

High school is hard for anyone anytime, even way back in the sixties (look it up in ancient history)I think its great that you are able to get that rock of your shoulder, it is very inspiring. Velvet and everyone else on this site are willing to listen and Pat lost her wig in the surf when she was 57 and she felt just like you did, I had to swim out with a hat for her did the rescuing male hero thing. What your feeling is valid and perfectly acceptable response to a stressful situation. Stay with who you are J. John

Permalink Reply by velvet on January 11, 2012 at 11:52am

hey welcome to the group hope it helps u read my discussion about guides. i dont think u have to worry abput the guys no guys are that bothered they are too embarresed to talk about it. im glad ur best friends were supportive and helped u its important to have people like that. all the people on my college course know about my alopecia and its definately a lot easier. hugs and if u ever need a chat inbox me or add me on facebook - Velvet Cooke xx.

Permalink Reply by Tara on May 22, 2013 at 9:13am

I'm new to this group and I'm a parent of a teen with AA. She was diagnosed last year at the age of 13. She has lost about 75% of her hair. She refuses to get a wig, and is terrified to start high school this fall. All of her friends and most classmates know about it as she doesn't wear anything to cover it. Do you have any suggestions as to how or if I should keep pushing the idea of a wig?

Permalink Reply by Alex on January 29, 2012 at 5:30pm

School was and is very hard, im actually getting black mailed by a boy who found out in the summer. I only tell my best friends. Music does help, the song I listen to most is Scars by Papa Roach.

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