ATB, you are such an inspiration.  This FFA journey has been quite frightening - part of it is the unknown.   The members on this site are all here for different reasons and in different stages.   All kinds of personalities.  It is refreshing to me to see you embrace the reality.  I hope more like you who can put a positive (?) spin on the disorder join the site and express how they deal with it.   None of us would choose it, however, in a strange way it has propelled me into making some life changes that are for the better for me physically, mentally, and emotionally.