So the last time I blogged I was 3 months pregnant and my hair had started to fall out again. Well it decided to do that wonderful thing that alopecia areata does and grow back and give me hope. At one point it actually started to get really full and thick and i had no spots. Then my little pumpkin was born (Hailey Darlene Burley-Heslop Oct 31st, 2010 thats why we call her our pumpkin 8lbs 13oz she was a big pumpkin lol) and then i noticed the back of my hair line started to creep up and up and up. Then those wonderful spots that I did not miss started to pop up all over and now as it stands my hair is the worst it has been since I was diagnosed.
My eyebrows and eyelashes are completely gone and my hair is barely there. I look on this site at pictures of people with the same alopecia areata and it seems they all have more hair then me and just a few spots. I only have a few spots of hair and they all seem to have their eyebrows and eyelashes. So even on this site all though full of beautiful strong people I still feel kind of alone. My alopecia was triggered by stress as many are and now since the baby has been born well anyone with children can tell you that is stressful enough, but now I find out the horrible pain in my jaw is because i am now grinding my teeth in my sleeping and clenching my jaw which is caused by stress. My body hates stress lol. I have tried talking to a therapist and that doesn't help and try doing things I love and that doesnt help and try to relax and nothing seems to help
Now ontop of having a little one who is turning 6 months old I find out that when I am done my maternity leave I will probably not have a job to come back to. I work as a manager for a video/cellphone company and I have been informed that they are closing my store and that there are no available manager positions. My boyfriend does not make the greatest money working at a restaurant but he works hard. Thankfully we live with my parents (oh ya and that is insanely stressful with a new baby and my boyfriend and I) and they do not make us pay rent cause they are amazing but we still have a baby and bills we have to pay. We were looking at moving out when i went back to work and were super excited and something to look forward and now it is like someone has shattered that and we are going to be stuck her forever which i know we wont but it feels like that right now. It has been a very long stressful 2 years and just doesn't seem to be letting up. I really dont know how much more i can handle before I break.
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