Comment by kimberly dean on October 21, 2013 at 9:35am

Yes for sure I get hair envy!   I think it's a normal response.  I guess we just have to create ways of managing these emotions.  I like playing with new make-up, jewellery, hats etc... to make myself feel better.  Be bold, be beautiful!

Comment by kimberly dean on October 21, 2013 at 9:37am

Larry, she is not being whiney, but you are being a meanie!!

Comment by Mark S. Hansen on October 21, 2013 at 1:41pm

Hair loss, especially complete hair loss, body, head, eye brows and eye lashes, is dev at any age. I lost all my hair 4 the last time when I was about 13. I turn 58 in Feb. But Aleopecia is the only condition, ignorance, malevevelant assumptions, stares, anti-social behavior by others etc, r the rotten stinking symptoms. of this condition. hair loss sucks but ignorance is worse.  

Comment by Jo Glenn on October 21, 2013 at 5:47pm

I try not to allow emotions or feelings that bring me down to consume my being.   I do have moments of sadness, I have grief that seems to always be just under the surface and I continually hope that someday somehow my hair will grow back as beautiful as it was before.  BUT at this moment in time, I am a bald lady.  I lost my hair from extreme trauma and emotional abuse... doctors say it's PTSD along with autoimmune issues.  No one thing can be pinpointed that in itself took quite awhile to come to terms with but now I know and deal with the fact that at the beginning of the day and at the end of the day I am a bald lady.

I decided to buy a super good wig one that fit my needs and wants.  I wear it when I need to look special, fit in at "other peoples" functions i.e. weddings, dinner parties etc... going out to dinner that kind of stuff.   Most all the time I am either wearing a beanie, a bandana or a hat.  I no longer care if someone wants to stare, or needs to approach me to tell me their story, or thinks they "know" what I am going through.  I am gracious and polite; I listen to others even if their story is about cancer.  I share that I have empathy regardless of what has caused their hair loss.  I never let anyone leave feeling that they have embarrassed me or bothered me.  I have decided that we all need to feel connected and whatever can make that happen is for the greater good of feeling better about who we are and that there are others that suffer similarly.

I also decided that if I was going to be a bald lady...in her early 50's I was going to rock it like no one else.  I have never really been heavy but I have had areas that weren't as toned as I would like and I had about 10 to 15 pounds that could come off so I now work out 4 to 6 times a week, I lift weights and I watch my diet.  I have to say I am pretty hott for a bald lady that hit the half century mark.  

The other things I do to combat the negative feelings and insecurity of my hair loss is to continually find beauty and thanks for everything I do have.  I give freely.  I show interest in others.  I make jokes about my hair loss so others can feel at ease.  I compliment others when their hair looks nice or they have a new cut.  I also listen when they complain about a bad hair day.  Why because I am more than my hair and some people are only as pretty as their hair.   I know that I am beautiful without my hair even though I had beautiful hair before. 

I guess I decided that I needed to be a beautiful fun loving person without something that could be taken away.... like my hair or my health. 

I hope you find some peace in your journey and even though I hate when people say it...things could be worse.

Love and hugs, Jo

Comment by fijifrangipani on October 21, 2013 at 7:03pm

I like your post because of it honesty.. it isnt fair that we lose our hair, as like you I really enjoyed doing things with mine, styles, colours, long to my buttocks, cropped short.. but I now love how I dont have to do any of that either. I think a lot of people take 10 years off my age because I am not greying.. I dont have one of the markers of age, or I am not working to cover it up.. the only thing I would like back are my eyebrows and eyelashes.. nothing more... 

Comment by Jo Glenn on October 21, 2013 at 7:20pm

HI fijifrangipani, I, too, have lost my eyelashes and eyebrows.   I have over the years gotten really good at eye make up but the best thing that I ever did was get tattoo eyebrows and eyeliner.  I no longer wake up feeling like Casper and I can actually go out with any make up and feel "okay".  I guess it helps in the long run of accepting.

Jo

 

Comment by fijifrangipani on October 21, 2013 at 7:28pm

Yes Jo, have found so many good products that do a great job. I live in Fiji so wouldnt let anyone here do the tattoos as it is quite different to what they normally do, they are good do not doubt that.. nothing beats the real thing though and I dont miss my hair, but I do miss my eyebrows and eyelashes some days.. I would love to be able to put on mascara again.. just a girly thing I think, but possibly why I paint my nails so much now..

Comment by Jo Glenn on October 21, 2013 at 7:40pm

Yes, but if life gives you no hair then you might need to find out a way to make it look like it does.  My eyebrows and eyeliner are one of the best decisions I made.   I am fortunate that I am close to a perfectionist.

 

Comment by fijifrangipani on October 22, 2013 at 8:30pm

I think my eyebrow pencil and eyeliner do a good job of making it look like I have eyebrows ad eyelashes.. most people dont even notice till I point it out.. have been this way most of my life and quite happy really.. I dont even want my hair back I love the freedom I now have. 

Comment by Liz on October 22, 2013 at 9:54pm

Thank for the laugh, Mary. Your post with Mary Tyler Moore's episode had me in tears! ~ I alopeciate it! =:^)

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