Comment by Baldilocks on August 31, 2012 at 11:41am

Aw Britt, I totally feel your pain! I've had AU for a year and am going through the exact emotions. You just have to keep telling yourself that AU DOES NOT define you, not one bit! You are still the same wonderful person as before, if not, better, after having dealt with what you have! You are such a strong person, always remember that, even if your hair never comes back.

And about the boys, you're right that they are shallow if they care about your lack of hair. You want someone who loves you for you, not the way you look. I was scared sh*tless to tell my now boyfriend! When we first started dating, I made him sleep in a separate room and I would lock the door so that he wouldn't sneak in on me "being bald." Then I finally told him and he was like "Oh, really?! I would've never known!" and that was it. He never ran away. He never said mean things. He stayed. And that's how I know he is the one for me. You will find a man that loves your hairlessness. I guarentee it. Sometimes you just need a little patience.

Try focus on the positives (as cliche as that sounds) as you are still a beautiful person. You just need to tell yourself on a daily basis. Instead of picking on all the things you dislike about your body, pick things that you DO like or are gratefull for. Sometimes I just thank God that I have two working legs to get me to the places I need to go! It can be as easy as that!

I hope you can take my advice as I know its easier said than done, but have faith that you will pull through this in a positive way.

xoxo

Comment by Maryanne on September 1, 2012 at 12:14am

Wow, in a way I could've written this. I can totally relate to the realities you are feeling. In another way, I could never have had the eloquence and intelligence of someone your age to write so honestly and clearly about what it's like to have Alopecia. You're going to be OK, though. I can tell. You're light years ahead of a lot of people.

People say things and they don't know what they're saying, really. We know what it's like. We understand. We're not alone. Life happens in cycles and I remind myself that whenever I'm down, I'll soon be up. That keeps me going. The fact that you're in college is something to be so proud of. I didn't have the courage to go many years ago. I did end up going later and that was perfect for me. But do know that you have what it takes to handle this. Sometimes it might just feel like your inner strength in not as apparent and up in the front where you can feel it. But it's there inside you and will make its appearance when you most need it. Keep being strong. We're here for you. :)

Comment by Brittany Peterson on September 1, 2012 at 8:39pm

I really appreciate all of your comments, life is just frustrating right now and it's nice to have a place to vent and people who deal with the same exact things as me on a daily basis. And for the most part I am proud of the way I deal with my AU, I had a friend who lost her hair because of bulimia and she could barely attend high school and her grades dropped and the criticism was too much for her to handle. Everyone deals with this stuff differently, and it takes time for people to evolve. I suppose my theory is that you can either let this disease make you unpleasant and angry and constantly looking into the past or go forward and not look back and take the good things like strength, knowledge and compassion and use them to push forward with the new difficulties life gives you today. Sometimes I just need reassurance and to know I'm not alone and it's always wonderful hearing how other people cope or look at this disease. I need a fresh pair of eyes sometimes.
Baldilocks (not sure your name because i don't have you as a friend! sorryyy!) I'm so glad to here that with hope and patience hopefully i'll find someone as sweet as your boyfriend who is willing to except me for me. I always tell my friends at least now I can weed out the good guys from the bad guys because my AU sometimes allows me to find less shallow people (if i tell them). But it's great to hear a positive story from someone so kind.
And Maryanne, I'm so sorry your going through what I'm going through but, hey, at least we are together in this. And I hope you take comfort in that and on the hard days think of me (:
Posts from people like you are really what keep me going. You have no idea how much your comments and support help me.

Comment by Denise on September 14, 2012 at 9:45pm

Britt

Hi I have AA bald with a few dark patches, 90% bald 10 % patches....no eyelashes or eyebrows......... 4years now. as the others have said , you get to feel what your feeling and venting here is awesome.. cause everyone gets it,,,,,,cause we all walk the same path. It sure as heck sucks some days I won't lie, but I try as they said to look at the good, it outweighs the bad.......... bad yes your right, some days are just not fair and no fun............... :) you said the words most of us feel........ I am positive 95% of the time but 5 % creeps in sometimes and gets me down for a bit........ here I can let it out. and I am alot older than you , so thank you for sharing. hang in there and you will meet a guy who accepts you for you. I am lucky my husband loved the old me but loves me now even more........ He says I am beautiful no matter what & he is lucky to have me in his life. There are great men out there.

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