Comment by Chris on July 14, 2013 at 1:04am

Madeline,

I too have suffered with the same symptoms that you have described, although my alopecia did not set in until much later in life. Through journaling I was able to identify the cause of my headaches - lack of sleep. When I go a week or more with an average of 5 hours of sleep per day I am guaranteed to get a cluster headache within 1 month. I was really astonished at how clock work like the headaches came on. I suggest starting a journal and record everything, what you eat, how much you exercised and of course when you start/end your headache. Over time you hopefully find a pattern and be able to change your habits to avoid the headaches. Also pay attention to little clues that a headache is about to set in - for me my vision in my left eye starts to diminish. As soon as this happens I take 3 advil and go to sleep. When I awake I have managed to sleep it off and may have just a mild headache.

As rfharp indicated take care of yourself first - establish patterns and use your bed for sleeping only, no homework, tv, phone in the bed. This will signal your body/mind that it’s time for bed.

As far as the alopecia goes - it takes time to get used to your new look and I have to admit that I am still not fully comfortable with it after 8 years. What has gotten me through is having a strong support group (My wife and kids) and knowing that my outward appearance does not control who I am.

Wish you all the best and continue to reach out for support!

Comment by Rici* on July 14, 2013 at 4:55am

Dear Madeline,
first: I want to give you a big hug.

Seems like it's all getting too much for you at the moment. I guess your migraine and the stress and worries your hair loss cause are even reinforcing each other now and I guess it's hard to manage to not let them take over your every day life. I also experienced my hair loss as sth that made me afraid of not having any control over my body. I lost my hair during my bachelors studies. One of my first and best decisions was that I would just study slower, take more time so I can handle and take care of myself and still pay enough attention on my courses. Could that maybe be an option for you, too?

I do not know what to say, I wish I had: "the magic solution" ;), But there is no use in driving yourself into a burnout. you would get even more problems. That you actually noticed and ask for help here already is a huge and good step!!!! So now the question is how to stop this downwards spiral? What are the things that make you feel good? Do you have time for these things? How could you get more time? Who could help you, be at you side?

Another thing I learned during the last years is that it is OK to be selfish and to say no. I do what I know is good for me, and sometimes people that don't know me well might think that I am boring, ignorant or selfish or whatsoever... but I know that I just listen to myself and don't force me through things that wouldn't do me good. But I also understood that self care alone is not worth anything. you need other people to take care for you and other people need you to take care of them. In you home you now need a lot of understanding and support from the adults living there, but they also need your support. Unfortunately I have no idea on how to get an atmosphere in which both sides feel good, exept: communication. My parents often have NO clue of what I think. At the same time I have no Idea of what they think (and if i think i know i might be wrong). So we had to learn to communicate better. And we did. It took a lot of time and energy. Talking about things again and again, really expressing what my problem is and how they can help me, so they can understand it... isn't always easy.

Madeline, I wish you strength, courage, optimism, and the support you need.
big big hug

Comment by Brandy on July 14, 2013 at 6:11am

Madaline,
Try not to let the hair loss bring you down. I know easier said the done. But that is great that you have been able to excel in school. Don't let this disease bring you down. There are several options out there to cover up the hair loss if you choose to. I was working on my Masters Degree and working full time when I was diagnosed with Alopecia and I didn't think I could but I got through it and I know you will too!

Comment by Anne Vanderlaan on July 14, 2013 at 9:31am

Hi,
It might be a good idea to see a therapist. I am one and I know some can help teach you how to meditate. This will help with your headaches. My son who is 18 will wear amethyst and feels it helps with his headaches. As far as the hair loss it is hard to come to terms with the fact you have something that might be with you your whole life. I do not like being bald at all but there is nothing I can do about it so I just have to accept that I have it. You are welcome to contact me if you need a listening ear. Sounds like to me you have a lot of people on this site who care about you! Or they would not be posting. Love and light to you.

Comment by Abdul on July 14, 2013 at 9:41am

Madeline,
I'm so sorry for you ......... really it is hard to explain
try to not let the alopecia beat you
I had A.U since two years . and i feel my self like an alien but i will still fight this deasies till the end ...
Regards

Comment by Christa on July 14, 2013 at 4:01pm

Hi Madeline,

I remember the stresses of school and getting into college. Then the hairloss on top of it all must really weigh on you. You could always take a year off after you graduate? Your physical and mental health are more important! Try to only focus on one thing at a time until then. Hang in there.

I'd suggest looking at possible food allergies for your headaches. Doctors never suggest it because they often don't look into the cause of our problems, they only try to treat the symptoms. I had my food allergies tested (blood test) by a naturopath and found out I was allergic to many foods which eliminating has reduced many of my irritating symptoms. I also had a friend that found out by eliminating soy she was able to stop her persistent headaches. May be something worth looking into.

Try to find time to do things that will cheer you up like watching a funny movie. I always feel better after dancing like a complete goof (alone) to some good music. You're young and still have a lot of mistakes to make and you should have fun while your doing it. I know it all seems really serious now, but take some time to forget about all the stresses of life and just be yourself. It's ok to be sad from time to time and it's totally understandable, but crying won't help anything. My boyfriend was good at helping me realize that I was stuck being a victim of alopecia instead of actually living my life. It got to a point where he just had to tell me to stop feeling sorry for myself and BE HAPPY! (tough love is his specialty). It took some time, but I just needed to change my frame of mind.

I'm sorry your having such a difficult time. Just remember there will be good days ahead! You can do it.

Comment by Kristin on July 15, 2013 at 2:39pm

That's a lot to deal with at such a young age! I wonder if changing your diet (you might need your parents' help with this) would help the cluster headaches. People with migraines and cluster headaches often have other issues that go untreated. Once treated, the migraine/cluster symptoms go away. Sleep apnea, food allergies, etc. Try the autoimmune diet to see if that helps. It's a super hard diet to follow, but you might feel better. If so, it's totally worth it. Check it out here:
http://www.thepaleomom.com/autoimmunity/the-autoimmune-protocol

You may also want to get an allergy test at the doctor to see if there's a concrete trigger for your clusters.

I used to get migraines all the time (at 10-25 years old), so I sort of understand where you're coming from. It may be hard to see now, but I would choose my AU over migraines any day.

I'd also echo what Anne Vanderlaan said: seek therapy. It's incredibly useful to work through all the sadness, anger, loss, and frustration that comes with hair loss. You can start your search here:
http://therapists.psychologytoday.com/rms/

I hope you feel better soon!

Comment by Bety on July 15, 2013 at 2:49pm

Madeline,

I just want to give you a big hug and send you all my support. You are a very strong girl, and I know you will get through this, this too shall pass :)

Comment by Neil on July 16, 2013 at 1:02am

Lots of good advice here. I read a few posts and agree with a lot of it but I will add my two cents so you have as many perspectives as possible. I am going to break it down and be as short and to the point as I can (which is not very short at all):

Headaches: The internet is your friend. Research and you may find a solution that works for you. Also, a lesson I learned from my father (it's a guy thing but you seem like you could use it), pain is simply a message from your brain that there is something wrong. Do something about it if you can but otherwise acknowledge it and you can make it go away. I know it sounds counter intuitive but I have found that if I concentrate on pain it will actually go away. More importantly, find the cause of the pain and address it in a constructive way. Stress can cause headaches and so can dehydration and caffeine withdrawal. I am sure there are many causes and if you look you may find the cause of your headaches.

Diet and lifestyle: Get lots of rest (especially since you are a teenager) and eat properly. And by properly I mean properly for you. Get allergy tests done and use a food diary to find which foods are not your friend. Also, ensure that you are getting the full spectrum of nutrients or your body can not possibly function properly.

Anxiety: I suspect that this may be normal at your age to an extent. I would suggest that you empower yourself physically and mentally. Martial arts are a good way to do this because they help condition your mind and body. I think quick thinking and physical ability are pretty good tools to combat anxiety.

Meditation: Relieves stress and expands your mind. I highly recommend it. There are different types and each has it's value. Meditation may not make your hair grow but it will help you deal with the loss of it. It may also help you combat your headaches.

Medication: Be wary and do all the research before you go down this road. It has been my observation that even when medications help to reduce a symptom they often come with undesirable side effects. A cure is one thing but a crutch is something else.

Alopecia: The reason you are here. And you've come to the right place. There are a lot of "survivors" on this site. And more than a few who will say that their struggles with alopecia have actually made them stronger. But by no means am I saying that you should be passive or that this is some sort of gift. The two non-medical treatments that seem to have the most success are diet changes (cut out gluten or any other food that causes you inflammation) and onion juice. Apparently rubbing onion juice on your patches will cause the hair to grow back. I have not tried this yet but thanks to a recent post on this site I learned that this has worked for quite a few people. I myself have had a lot of success by eliminating wheat from my diet.

I wish you the best and hope you find the tools you need to deal with your alopecia, and your parents ;)

Comment by Yogita on July 16, 2013 at 6:05am

Hey Madeline... Being a teenager itself is a great challenge & you are facing many more...
From your blog I can sense that you are a strong person & you can & will overcome your problems. First of all don't your health conditions rule your mind. This time will pass & your life will be filled with colors of Rainbow.

Learn some relaxations techniques. Maintain healthy diet with your doctors help & try to learn how to withdraw yourself from troubling situations. Like when your parents are yelling at you, try to solve the most difficult problem of your syllabus, after some time your parents yelling will not bother you. This is very difficult but THE MOST effective measure of tackilng stress.
Take very good care of yourself. Have faith.

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