Letting it be and accepting me

So as many of you know, I have decided to stop my treatment and purchase a wig. I have spent the past 3 years trying different medications, injections, topical treatments to do what...postpone the inevitable? My hair has been getting worse lately and that was before I stopped my medications. I have tapered myself off of my aldactone and now my hair is just getting worse and worse. Good thing I have my appointment this weekend for a wig.

I just read the blog of "I am exhausted"( http://www.alopeciaworld.net/profiles/blogs/i-feel-exhausted ) and I agree, I am exhausted of all of my ailments that have finally been diagnosed in the past 3 years since I went to finally see a doctor again for my PCOS(which I had 15 years ago or more which wasn't diagnosed until 3 years ago). I went from taking no pills to taking TOO many! I understand that I need the medications for PCOS and hypothyroidism and dysmetabolic syndrome(pre-diabetes)..yeah I have issues...but I am done taking medications to try and hold off on losing my hair.

I am allowing nature to run it's course and I am not going to worry about losing my hair anymore. I am going to let it be and I am going to take control and make me a better me(emotionally).

I agree with Julie B..I am going to let it be and just be..just be me for once! And if people don't like it, then I don't need them in my life.

Views: 8

Comment by Chefpam on January 20, 2011 at 1:48pm
I am in the same boat...tired of this rollercoaster. I got a wig from Flora in N.J. in November. It is hard to let go but I think even harder to keep hoping and then being let down. We have a lot in common it seems. Hugs to you.
Comment by Julie G on January 20, 2011 at 1:51pm
How is it going with your new wig? Do you find that it has helped you emotionally?
Comment by Chefpam on January 20, 2011 at 2:12pm
I have worn it 4x. Because of my painful sore scalp, it makes it very difficult. I have been taking Curcumin for the pain and it has helped some. I have to wear it tomorrow so I will let you know. My emotions are crazy right now. I feel strong when I am in my house alone talking to God but then when I have to face the world or the mirror it's a different story.
Comment by Julie G on January 20, 2011 at 2:14pm
I am worried about the emotions once I am wearing it. My hair just continues to slowly come out and soon I am not sure how much I will have left on top of my head. But I have told a few friends and coworkers and they have all been very supportive, we will see if that continues once they see me wearing one.
Comment by Chefpam on January 20, 2011 at 2:49pm
That's great that you have supportive friends and coworkers. I have been unable to work for year now due to my health and none of my coworkers have seen me since I lost my thick locks.
Comment by Julie G on January 20, 2011 at 2:54pm
I have pretty much kept my hair loss to myself, thinking that if I don't talk about it that it didn't exist. But that was totally not true, people just didn't bring it up to me(besides a few assholes that would point it out to me like I didn't know).
I have found that the few people that I have talked to about it actually had questions about it. Of course I am sure I will come across people that will be incompetent or insensitive and probably act the opposite, but I guess that is something I will have to deal with when it comes up.
I am worried about the dating scene once I get one, not that my dating scene has been active anyways, but I think that my self esteem will be helped in this process, I hope.
Comment by T.J.R. on January 20, 2011 at 7:14pm
All of us are sick and tired! I think mainly because of the attitudes of others. But you be at peace with YOUR decisions. Whatever you do, do it well and ROCK ON GIRL! We are all sexy beasts! Peace and Love to all my beauties out there.
Comment by Mary on January 20, 2011 at 8:53pm
Right on! Jan. 30 is my 3rd anniversary of the date I decided to LET IT BE - I shaved and stopped all treatments and got on with life.
Comment by Amy on January 20, 2011 at 11:14pm
I too thinks it great that you're moving on! I did the same about 7 months ago and haven't looked back. I was doing DCPC treatments and found that I was getting so depressed because my head was always so sore from the treatments, that once I got home and took the wig off, I didn't want to leave the house. My relationship with my husband suffered (although he was super supportive) and the only life I had was with my couch and TV. I'm even in the process of coming off my anti-depressants now! It's such a great feeling to just let things go!
There will always be those times when something happens that makes you upset about the whole thing. I'm an elementary school teacher, and kids being kids will say things unintentionally that hurt, but I just shake it off and move on.
One thing that always makes me feel better is getting a new wig! I've been through 2 so far, and am in the process of looking into getting a vacuum wig. The thought of the day when it's finally mine makes me soooo excited!
As for the rest of your hair, shave it! I cried while my husband shaved my head for the first time, and now when I have some growth and shave, it's such a great feeling. I even have a silly little post-shave head dance.
Bon courage! You'll be just fine :)
Comment by Julie G on January 21, 2011 at 8:10am
Thank you all for your words of encouragement!!!

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