I could remember being five years old or so, I was sitting between my mother legs and she was using one of the millions of hair growth products on my hair. She was convinced that my premature birth had caused my hair lost, she was convinced that my hair just needed moisture and she was convinced that my hair would grow back..but it didn’t. Over the years my hair loss gradually had gotten worse, she had sent me to doctors who thought maybe it was a fungus and I just need certain creams. She had used home relaxer kits (makes your hair straight) and that the hair that I did have left would be easier managed that way. But it didn’t. I was left a few pieces of straight hair and the rest of my head look like a piss poor lawn with dried up grass. Going to school and interacting with kids who had lovely hair was just torture. I had to answer questions about why my hair was gone and suffered teasing from my own siblings. We finally went to a doctor we diagnosed me with Alopecia areata. We couldn’t afford any special treatment and I could remember crying about it and my mother telling me to get over it. Of course someone with a full head of hair would not understand. I often had dreams that I had full head of hair. Hell hair that covered my scalp so I couldn’t see any balding would have been good. I held on to the idea of having hair up until last year. I have been hiding my head under a wig for a really time and even now I feel ashamed of my clean bald head.