Comment by Tallgirl on August 27, 2011 at 9:30pm

When there is no way out of something, then live in it. Pretend you are 40-year-old-you, advising 27-year-old-you. What would that 40-year-old woman with hair loss have done, learned, felt, loved, accomplished and decided? What books, jokes, poems, journals, songs or paintings would she have created to scream, cry or laugh about her fate by age 40? On the road to thinking about Future You, you may find out that there is much more that you like about yourself than just one physical feature. Read down to my blog about long hair (Rapunzel), and go rent that movie. Think about hair on a deeper level while watching. Afterwards, beverage in hand or to favorite music, come up with some other magical things about your personality or spirit upon which you can build your adult identity.

And next time, pick a few cheaper synthetic wigs, so you lessen your anger and have some fun! You are now a NEW you. Turn the nightmare into a different, crazy, bold dream.

Comment by Jennybnkr on August 28, 2011 at 12:05pm

Thank you Tallgirl. You put my situation in a different perspective. Although i have to admit it still hurts when i see women with the hair i used to have. I can't change what happened. I liked when you said " Turn the nightmare into a different, crazy, bold dream." That really touched me :) Thanks again

Comment by LilyBell*Murphy'sLawLuvsMe on August 28, 2011 at 4:54pm

You weathered a difficult storm with the brain tumor and you WILL come to terms with this too :) Everyone progresses at their own rate of acceptance and level of comfort. Do not beat yourself up if you do not think you are 'accepting' your hair loss fast enough. I had cancer years ago but compared to this hair loss thing I breezed through that and got my arse kicked by this - so I think I may understand a little bit of how you are feeling. Perhaps asking yourself why this is so bothersome to you when you beat the brain tumor. And what else can 'go wrong' - like you have not had enough to deal with in your 27 years!!!! I cannot explain why the hair loss hits some of us so hard anymore than why some deal better with life and death situations like cancer and brain tumors. For me I have stop trying to figure out the why, and am just learning to accept what is and make the best of it. For me that is wigs. Do I still miss my hair - yeap still do - probably always will - most days I do the best I can - some days I still cry but the crying and depression over the hair loss has become 'manageable' for the most part for me. I take an anti-depressant for a variety of reasons and if meds also are helping you - then I think of them no differently than a diabetic taking insulin - if you need them they are medically necessary.

I still do not like shampoo commercials!! : )- but then again I always was an avid channel surfer. However they bother me so I just switch to some other channel then back again to my show.

Hang in there - it will get better!

Comment by Joshua on September 1, 2011 at 10:32am

Hi,

I couldnt agree more with what others had said. Jenny, you've been through brain tumour, a hardship that is far greater than alopecia, on the other hand, one can say is a different thing. Nevertheless, Jenny you're not alone, and it is your decision not to let alopecia degenerate into a nightmare, alopecia doesnt deserve more negative attention in our lives that it should be. However, it is true that we are constantly being "reminded" that we're abnormally bald by shampoo commercials, saloon, hair styles..etc and the society's obsession with outer beauty.

Eventhough I feel bad every now and then of not having hair, but I wake up everyday making a decision that I wont let alopecia stop me from being successful in life, living a life that all others non-alopecians are living.

I once let alopecia stop me from falling in love, and part of me still regret till today...but life goes on. Jenny, you're not alone. We're always here to listen :).

Take one step at a time. God bless.

Joshua

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