Need help! So many questions regarding wigs

Hi. I have recently lost my hair over 4 months. Its not coming back. I am distraught. I am having a very rough time wearing wigs esp. synthetic. I purchased a human hair wig and its pouring rain today. I was afraid to wear it outdoors. I wore a bandana and I look awful. This is pushing me over the edge. How do you cope with this? It broke my heart to take off my hair last night and put on a stand. This is making me want to die. I cannot go bare as I have scarring and its not for me. On th?e other hand neither are wigs. So if you are a f-t. Wig wearer. How many do you own? How do you deal with the synthetics I have purchased synthetics in the past and they look fake, they do not hold up.I have the cotton cap. What brand of synthetic is tolerable? What about hot humid summers? I am supposed to return to work and wonder how I will deal with this? I am super depressed and angry. Thank you for any support.

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Comment by Dianna 845 on February 14, 2016 at 4:02am
Hi.I have a " hat with hair' it looks awful.I need to cover awful facelift scars as well ..this is causing extra stress. However I look awful in short wigs. The pixie type..I really just want to die over this. Will I adapt?
Comment by Sun Wilder on February 14, 2016 at 1:36pm

I'm sorry you're going through this struggle, I know how hard it is. I had to shave what was left of my hair back in 2007 and have been a day time wig wearer since. I currently wear custom wigs from a company called hair direct. This works for me because they look more nature are fairly comfortable. I strongly recommend these hair pieces. They are expensive at about 900 each but worth it. You can choose color, texture, length, hair type ect. They offer to cut the hair for you but I always get it uncut and go to a saloon. I did a lot of research about wig making before ordering and that really helped me to make the right decisions. Another thing, I make a mold on my head with saran wrap and tape. You can youtube how to do this. This provides a true custom fit! If you make it super tight you can wear it pretty securely without tape or adhesive.

Now for the hard part, you have to learn to love yourself again and realize this is not your fault. For me, it took some time and I hung on to denial when things were really tough. Surround yourself with people you love, do positive things for yourself and know that this challenge will actually make you a better person! Hang in there, you're doing awesome and it WILL get better! I promise! It's really only just hair :) 

Comment by Sun Wilder on February 14, 2016 at 1:41pm

One more thing, becareful who you order wigs from I got ripped off from this company called upscale lace wigs. She took my money, never sent my order and now won't return any calls or emails. 

Comment by Dianna 845 on February 14, 2016 at 1:59pm
Hi Sun Wilder, I do wish I were able to agree " its just hair" I'm not there yet. Its so difficult to look in mirror and not recognize myself. Its also hard with glasses. Thanks for the wig purchasing tips. I'm totally mortified at coping with this. I find I shower less, socialize less. What's left of my hair is still coming out. I'm about to shave it. Admitting complete defeat. I cannot fathom wearing wigs rest of my life. How do I enjoy outdoor activities with a wig? Ugh, the thought. I wonder how long it takes to accept? I know we are all different.I do not know what triggered the rapid drastic hair loss. I truly miss my beautiful silky blonde hair. It never looked so good as it did 6 months to a year prior to it falling out.I find it devastating. That's just me. If wig wearing were more natural looking and comfortable that would be great.
Comment by Dianna 845 on February 15, 2016 at 6:37pm
That would be great!!!! Let me know how you make out.
Comment by Tanya on February 15, 2016 at 9:55pm

Hi Diane. I've got a bunch of wigs, maybe 9 by now. So, the bad news is that with wigs you usually get what you pay for. The good news is that if you save for a good one, and treat it well, it will last you a long time and keep you sane. I started off with synthetic because of the price, and they were okay, but I decided to try human hair, which turned out to be much better.

I personally really like wigs by Amore for their cap. (Same cap for human and synthetic hair) It's got a silky layer at the top of your head, so it doesn't itch, and the rest fits pretty good as well. I tried one by... I want to say Rene of Paris, and it was really heavy and thick on top.

To keep your wigs from looking fake, first of all, pick something close to your natural colour, because if it matches your skin tone, people will pay less attention to it. The fakest part of most wigs is usually the part where the wig ends and your face starts, so stay away from things without bangs that part in the middle of your head. Bangs will hide that, but they're not for everyone, especially synthetic ones. They're not comfortable against the skin. I prefer long-ish side bangs, with sort of a Little Mermaid kind of swoop, so they stay up and away from the face and lead the eye away from where your hairline should be. 

You'll get to be okay with it in time. I'd suggest chopping off the rest of what you've got. It made me more miserable to look at the few sickly strands I had left than to just have a nice round head. Plus you get the added bonus of washing your head along with your face, which is actually quite nice. It'll be hard for a while, but try not to worry about how you look, especially when you come home. Step in the front door, take that sucker off, and throw a cold wet paper towel on your head. Sure you'll look ridiculous, but it feels pretty great.

Buy yourself a comb with one of those pointy ended handles. Great for random itches and to fish out stray hairs that have climbed into the cap.

The great news is that if you thought you were pretty before, you'll feel pretty again, because you're pretty, and that isn't just because of your hair. In fact, it's sometimes a good thing. You can totally customize your look however you want. There's plenty of people that wear wigs for fun, and not to cover something up, and nobody bats an eye. So it's also totally acceptable to get yourself a cute hairdo in a bolder colour, if that's what makes you feel good.

It's been about 7 years for me, and there's still stuff that I'm self conscious about, but a lot of stuff has become so much easier once you get into the frame of mind that it's just a thing that sometimes happens to people, and it's just something that you don't let get in the way of more important things.

P.S. If you shave your head, rub your head on the carpet. It's probably the most horrible/funny sensation in the world and you can know that 95% of the people will never know what that feels like.

Comment by Dianna 845 on February 15, 2016 at 10:11pm
Hi Tayna, thank you for your informative response. I feel that due to this condition I will spend more time indoors. This makes me worry. I have a $1200 Jon Renau. Have no idea how to style it. Hair really isn't all that soft or comfy either. My synthetic is a dark color. I used to be blonde.I guess I'm not crazy about either piece. Yes, I realize importance of bangs. Find it hard to believe they can't make better quality wigs( meaning can't tell) the synthetic I have was alnist $500 the lace part looks like a screen to me..Also do you wear a cap under? How do I keep it from slipping? There's nothing to pin to. I pray I can't adjust to this.
Comment by Tanya on February 15, 2016 at 10:50pm

I get mine from wigs.com, get on their newsletter (I'm sure other sites will do a similar thing), and they'll send you emails when they have sales, especially around the 4th of july or other big holidays, they do sales of 30% off. So mine ended up costing me about $700 instead of the full $1.2k.

I like the lace front, because it makes the part/hairline look a little smoother. You can give it a little trim if it sticks out too far. Most people won't be getting too close to inspect your forehead, especially if the hairline has side bangs draped over it. (And probably, we think people care a lot more about what's going on with our hair than they actually do)

I don't like any of that cap/tape/glue stuff, so I don't use it. (I'm lazy, the extra effort makes me unhappy.) Most of my wigs have stayed on just fine without, at least during day-to-day activities. You should be fine unless you're a huge fan of rocking out to heavy metal.

The only times I've had issues or had to take preventative measures was:
1) Cannonballs into pools. You'll go under water, your hair will remain on top. Humiliating? Yes. Funny? YES.
2) Roller coasters that do the loop-de-loop. I bring a cute scarf to drape over the top of my head to pin the wig in place and just hold the ends with one hand. Everyone's too busy screaming to notice anyway.
3) This is probably the most unfortunate one. If you're on your back, if you know what I mean, and someone pins your hair down, the angle that you're at will slide that puppy right off. Use tape, or get on top.

Wind is not an issue, I've never had it come off from a gust of wind, but if it's extra crazy, I feel better with a hand gently holding it down, just like you would to keep natural hair from becoming too messy.

I'm a stay at home kind of person, so I don't know if it's affected the amount I go out, but going to the beach and camping isn't a problem. I usually wear my older/cheaper wigs for those things, and sometimes bring one to change into if it's going to be a full day sort of thing after the beach. There's nothing pleasant about a moist wig cap. For stuff like camping with my close friends, I sometimes just wear a baseball cap, because you get all gross as it is, everyone is tired and hot and nobody cares what anyone else looks like. I still bring a compact to draw on my eyelashes and eyebrows, because I don't even look like people without them, but the head hair, I find, is not as big of a deal, especially to people that are close to you.

Comment by LeslieAnn Butler on March 24, 2016 at 11:18pm

Hi Dianna, I have quite a few wigs. Some are custom European hair, but most are synthetic. I used to wear long, but I am starting to enjoy shorter styles now and I absolutely love Sheridan from Paula Young. It is quite inexpensive (about $70) and I get the Swedish blonde rooted color. It looks adorable! Here's a hoto

Comment by Dianna 845 on March 25, 2016 at 8:09am
Hi Leslie and thank you for response and photo. You look very nice. Does that wig have permatease? I'm waiting for a sale to purchase " Haley". Do you have any experience with that one? I have "Emma"'by esoterica. It was pricey and is so uncomfortable i can't wear it. I need shorter wig and cooler. Thus will be my first summer in a wig. I find I'm getting anxious. I'm trying to start a collection. I've e had so many losses in recent times and hair loss just tops it off!

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