Self-conscious about my wig

Hello Fellow Alopecians,

I'm new to Alopecia World but I am thrilled to have found a site like this. I was feeling like I was the only person in the world with this condition. I was first diagnosed with Alopecia when I was 16. (I'm now 36.) I had a couple of spots in the back of my head. After a few rounds of shots, the hair grew back. 20 years later, the same spots appeared after taking on a new and very stressful job. I figured I would get some shots and they would grow in again. Boy was I wrong!!!!! It spread like wildfire. Every time I combed my hair, clumps and clumps would come out. When I would look at myself in the mirror, I felt like I was dying. I have always had long, thick, curly hair. My hair started to fall Nov. 2010, by March 2011 it was so bad I asked my husband to buzz it. I thought if I found a good quality wig I would feel better.

I found a 100% Human Hair wig that looked almost identical to the hair I had lost. I felt confident wearing it but it is a pain to maintain. I have to wash and comb it out every 3 days or so. Since it's curly, it starts to form little dred locks in the back. GRRRRRRRRRR! A friend of mine gave me another Human Hair wig. It feels great, only problem I have is that it is straight hair. I am so nervous about the tracks showing and so if anyone compliments me I immediately tell them it's a wig which brings us into a whole conversation about why I wear one. I feel like if I get a compliment, I have to tell them I'm wearing a wig because they might have thought it was in the first place. Am I the only one who feels this way?

Most of my friends and family don't even know what I'm going through. I feel more comfortable talking about it with "strangers" then I do with people I know. Still feel ashamed even though I know this is something I did not cause. Longing for the day when I can just rock my bald head with my head up high and KNOW that I am beautiful without hair.

Views: 803

Comment by Lisa-Lynn Marini on July 8, 2011 at 8:09am
Hi Michelle,
You are not alone in this at all, I've had some straight wigs but found that it would just get all tangled at the bottom and it felt uncomfy cause I thought people would notice it.I was always afraid of the wind too cause if it blew there you would see my tracks.
Therefore I bought really curly synthetic wigs and found them to be the best, I was once outside and it was quite windy I was little scared and someone actually walked up to me and said "wow what a great head of hair you have.From then on when I went out I chose to wear my curly wigs. They are easy to maintain if you buy synthetic!! at night when I take it off I take my fingers with a bit of water and twirl the hair back into shape and it works like a charm, if you buy all the proper styling items for curly wig you shouldn't have any problems and I wash my wig about every 12 wears!! After I did my first wash my wig was back to normal!!
Try out a synthetic curly wig, beleive me NO ONE will even notice it's a wig!! I get many comments about mine when I wear it and it is quite durable in the wind!!
Hope this helps abit
Cheers
Lisa
xox
Comment by Calipso on July 8, 2011 at 2:21pm
Hi Michelle, I feel similar about compliments - I always feel like I have to tell them It's a wig... And that's annoying...I really don't want to even think about my hair, just forget what I am wearing and things people say (no matter bad or good) brings the attention to my hair and my problem again I I just feel down.. Glad you've found a wig that suits you! I really haven't found one yet. I have one, but It doesn't look very good on me...
Comment by Christy Ingram on July 8, 2011 at 8:50pm
Hi Michelle, Welcome to AW! Please do not feel ashamed, and no you aren't the only one who feels this way! This is something you have no control over! AW is an awesome place to help you on this journey. I have been wearing several styles of alternative hair for going on a year. It is still sometimes difficult, but I am also having fun. When someone asks where I got my hair styled and or colored I try to use it as an opportunity to inform a little about alopecia, if there aren't a lot of other people around. I usually get oohs and ahhhs about how they couldn't tell it wasn't real. I have thought about saying Rene' of Paris, or someone named Noriko etc...I haven't been able to rock the bald look yet, maybe someday. I do go swimming at public pools with a bandana or scarf.
Comment by Al on July 9, 2011 at 10:03am
You should try using toppik
Comment by Violet on July 9, 2011 at 6:55pm
Hey Michelle, welcome to AW!

When I wore wigs, at first I would tell people immediately that it was a wig if they complimented my hair. Then one day as a test, I didn't and the person just went along like nothing was out of the ordinary after they told me my hair looked good. Ha! They were fooled! So I just acted confident every time from then on and people were none the wiser. You don't have to tell people if you don't want to - it's funny but people are alot less perceptive than we believe them to be - it's more like we're hypersensitive. :) Anyhow, I only wear wigs once in a blue moon now (if I want to mess with people at work and throw them - no one recognizes me the entire day heehee). But I found that anything longer than my collarbone would get tangly. So I wore straight wigs (Ease by Revlon and Impressive by Revlon) that were synthetic but very realistic looking.

Try not telling someone it's a wig and see what happens...I'm telling you they won't know the difference. And you can just get a kick out of it like others here! :) Good luck to you and keep sharing with us.
Comment by Julie G on July 11, 2011 at 8:31am
Michelle,
I know how you feel with the questioning about telling people about the wig. In the beginning I wasn't sure what I was going to do, but I figured that this is my chance to educate and maybe make a difference in the acceptance of alopecia. There are some people that I don't tell, but I do tell the majority. This weekend I was out at a bar and I had a guy tell me that I had the most beautiful hair. I said, well thank you..(I hesitated whether I was going to tell him or not) it's a wig. He couldn't believe it and said that it looked so natural. Of course, I knew that he was gay(he was a friend of a friend) so I didn't have to worry about maybe dating him. I am not sure if I would be so confident if it were someone actually flirting with me or not.

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