Hello. My name is Aaron and i'm fairly new to this site. I made an account last year, yet this is the first time I've logged on since. I spent a good deal of my night reading through some of the discussions and responses of people who are experiencing alopecia. It inspired me to share my thoughts and experiences of this life long ordeal that I have dealt with for 23 years.

Shortly after my 1st birthday, I lost all of my hair due to Alopecia Universalis. I spent all of my childhood bullied and ridiculed due to it, and it had an effect on the way I developed as a child. I often struggled in school and was fairly introverted. I made a few friends growing up. Some bullied me at times, while others supported me. In High School, I started to accept how I looked a bit more. Undoubtedly, I was a handsome kid, but lacked the hair or confidence to initiate in conversations with girls at my school. As soon as I noticed that girls were fairly interested in me, I started dating around. Honestly, I experienced more relationships in High School in comparison to College. So here I am today, graduating from College in a few months, and I can't help but look back in retrospect. Emotionally, I've learned to accept it. It does not bother me when I have to provide an explanation to why I look the way I do.  I can guarantee that out of anyone on this site, I have experienced the most bullying. I mean, go through Marine Corps boot camp with alopecia and tell me otherwise haha. However, having alopecia in the military got better as soon as I hit the unit and made friends. Granted, half of the Marine Corps is bald anyways. As for dating, I've had a lot of success in the recent months. I'm honestly too picky for my own good, and I shouldn't be. I've been looking for someone who is intelligent, ambitious, and has the beauty I've always desired. I've went on 3 dates this past month, all with women who were absolutely gorgeous on my scale. Unfortunately, I think they were reluctant to commit to anything serious. Especially with a man who is already bald at the age of 23. But, i'm still trying . I'm pretty confident about myself, and I feel like I have a lot to offer. It's just a matter of time before I find someone who falls within the criteria of what i'm looking for, yet chooses to look beyond the skin on my head. 

I'm scrolling through the discussions, and I find that the most relevant topic through the page deals with relationships and finding that significant other. I understand that this is difficult for all of us. Many responses are optimistic; whereas, others are quite pessimistic. I'd like to approach this topic as a realist. We're bald, and to many people, baldness is not an attractive feature. I mean, can you blame them? A vast majority of the population has hair, so it is only reasonable to assume that such a physical feature is a requirement for attraction. That goes for any physical feature which is biologically inherited by a majority of the population. From my perspective on the matter, the best thing we can do about it is learn to accept it and find ways to deal with it. We can continue to be down on ourselves about what we lack, or we can find ways to improve what we have. Realistically, our chances in successfully dating will be reduced significantly due to our condition. However, this does not mean that we can't improve out chances. I often ask myself.. "what can I do to increase my chances?" At this point, I've accepted that a lack of hair is something that I cannot change. But, there are things that I can, and I will. Whether it be a change of my physique, my wardrobe, my confidence, my personality.. There is ALWAYS something to work on. Something to improve, and the more you work on it, the better off you are. At the end of the day, your life is what you make it.

Views: 418

Replies are closed for this discussion.

Replies to This Discussion

Thank you for your post, Aaron. I agree with you. I only wish I had come to the same conclusions that you have when I was younger!
Inspiring post, Aaron. Thank you for sharing!

I'm currently 28 and have spent my life with a good head of hair + ample body hair. That all changed within 10 days about 3 months ago. I'm unmarried and this hair-loss has definitely caused insecurities. I've wondered if i'll be able to meet the right woman, now. I'm definitely doing my best to stay positive and it helps to hear from people like yourself.
Props to you Aaron, Its nice to see someone who has the same attitude i Have. I have accepted alopecia at a young age so I know what youve been through minus the bullying i was always the popular kid and didnt really have a problem during that period that i started to lose my hair. so its been a good 20+ years now. Ive never had any problem dating or meeting ladies. I hope your posts motivates people to be themselves as I have tried before with some members
Aaron I love your viewpoints on life. I HAVE HAD AA to some degree since I was 3.At it's worst I got picked on at its best it wasn't horribly noticeable. I found when dating explaining alopecia early on helped that way the guys I dated new all my hair could fall out again. I never tried to hide it. I lost almost all of my hair 1 week before my wedding. I have been married 3 years to a handsome sweet man and can say if you open yourself up to the possibility, a great person is out there, hair or no hair. I rarely wear a wig and my husband proudly goes out with his bald wife. I hope everyone finds there soul mate. Just hang in there.

RSS

Disclaimer

Any mention of products and services on Alopecia World is for informational purposes only; it does not imply a recommendation or endorsement by Alopecia World. Nor should any statement or representation on this site be construed as professional, medical or expert advice, or as pre-screened or endorsed by Alopecia World. Alopecia World is not responsible or liable for any of the views, opinions or conduct, online or offline, of any user or member of Alopecia World.

© 2024   Created by Alopecia World.   Powered by

Badges  |  Report an Issue  |  Terms of Service