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Hello. My name is Aaron and i'm fairly new to this site. I made an account last year, yet this is the first time I've logged on since. I spent a good deal of my night reading through some of the discussions and responses of people who are experiencing alopecia. It inspired me to share my thoughts and experiences of this life long ordeal that I have dealt with for 23 years.
Shortly after my 1st birthday, I lost all of my hair due to Alopecia Universalis. I spent all of my childhood bullied and ridiculed due to it, and it had an effect on the way I developed as a child. I often struggled in school and was fairly introverted. I made a few friends growing up. Some bullied me at times, while others supported me. In High School, I started to accept how I looked a bit more. Undoubtedly, I was a handsome kid, but lacked the hair or confidence to initiate in conversations with girls at my school. As soon as I noticed that girls were fairly interested in me, I started dating around. Honestly, I experienced more relationships in High School in comparison to College. So here I am today, graduating from College in a few months, and I can't help but look back in retrospect. Emotionally, I've learned to accept it. It does not bother me when I have to provide an explanation to why I look the way I do. I can guarantee that out of anyone on this site, I have experienced the most bullying. I mean, go through Marine Corps boot camp with alopecia and tell me otherwise haha. However, having alopecia in the military got better as soon as I hit the unit and made friends. Granted, half of the Marine Corps is bald anyways. As for dating, I've had a lot of success in the recent months. I'm honestly too picky for my own good, and I shouldn't be. I've been looking for someone who is intelligent, ambitious, and has the beauty I've always desired. I've went on 3 dates this past month, all with women who were absolutely gorgeous on my scale. Unfortunately, I think they were reluctant to commit to anything serious. Especially with a man who is already bald at the age of 23. But, i'm still trying . I'm pretty confident about myself, and I feel like I have a lot to offer. It's just a matter of time before I find someone who falls within the criteria of what i'm looking for, yet chooses to look beyond the skin on my head.
I'm scrolling through the discussions, and I find that the most relevant topic through the page deals with relationships and finding that significant other. I understand that this is difficult for all of us. Many responses are optimistic; whereas, others are quite pessimistic. I'd like to approach this topic as a realist. We're bald, and to many people, baldness is not an attractive feature. I mean, can you blame them? A vast majority of the population has hair, so it is only reasonable to assume that such a physical feature is a requirement for attraction. That goes for any physical feature which is biologically inherited by a majority of the population. From my perspective on the matter, the best thing we can do about it is learn to accept it and find ways to deal with it. We can continue to be down on ourselves about what we lack, or we can find ways to improve what we have. Realistically, our chances in successfully dating will be reduced significantly due to our condition. However, this does not mean that we can't improve out chances. I often ask myself.. "what can I do to increase my chances?" At this point, I've accepted that a lack of hair is something that I cannot change. But, there are things that I can, and I will. Whether it be a change of my physique, my wardrobe, my confidence, my personality.. There is ALWAYS something to work on. Something to improve, and the more you work on it, the better off you are. At the end of the day, your life is what you make it.
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