Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by Rose Marie' on October 4, 2013 at 5:43am

Hi

With most wigs it isn't necessary, but can sometimes make them a little more comfortable. I really depends on the type of wig you want to wear.

I think you have answered your own question here with your comment. To shave your head at this time is not something your feel comfortable with so just don't do it. :)

In my experience when your hair gets to the point where you want to wear a full wig you really need to think whether the hair underneath is helping the situation you are in. Shaving is a very personal thing and one that can take people a long time to process...sometimes never and that's ok. With those dealing with alopecia it is like asking somebody to do a 180 turn...for years you may have been trying to hold on to the hair you have...so to move your mind to taking away the hair you have can be very frightening.

There are some lovely ladies on AW that shave their hair and some that just have no hair. They also prefer to present themselves without hair. You should have a chat to Mary and Cheryl, about their decisions around this.

In my daughters case she shaved what was left of her hair when she was 12...as sad as that was it was also very empowering for her as she felt she had taken back control of her hairloss. She has never looked back and enjoys her choice of hair because of it.

Hope this helps and yes I believe there is a solution for you.

Rosy

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Permalink Reply by purplemainst on October 4, 2013 at 8:00am

Hi,

Wow, I didn't realize shaving remaining hair was so prevalent. I appreciate other's decisions, but I can't imagine it EVER! I am so sad and tired and afraid. Do you ever feel ok again?

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Permalink Reply by Rose Marie' on October 4, 2013 at 8:47pm

Yes you will feel ok again..... This is a grieving process and it will take as long to move through it as you need. Don't berate yourself, do be proactive though..you will find your way.


Rosy

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Permalink Reply by purplemainst on October 5, 2013 at 7:33am

Thanks, I needed to hear there is hope that I will feel ok someday again. I know Grief can be overwhelming and this is soooo public. EVERYONE has to know I have this issue. So hard to get through the day because you can't get away from it and pretend even for a little while.

Praying like crazy to be able to manage this and for some peace.

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Permalink Reply by Mindy on October 4, 2013 at 11:04am

I haven't shaven my remaining hair....yet. However, I keep cutting it shorter and shorter to accommodate the bald spots. I was so close to shaving it two nights ago because I am so tired of the process and it has only been 4 months. Others say that you cant tell just looking at me but they don't know how much effort I put into fixing my hair so they can't tell. I have a wig on standby for when that happens. However, I have some baby hairs growing in a couple of spots but still shedding as well. I chopped my hair off again (second time this month) or else I would have shaven it and put on my wig. But like the PP said. It is your choice. That was a hard step for me that I just came to was that I am the only one who can make that choice even if it is not the advise I am getting.
Oh and yes you can wear a wig without shaving. I put on my wig and pulled out my bangs and sides and blended them into the wig with a brush and it gave even more of a natural look..

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Permalink Reply by purplemainst on October 4, 2013 at 4:06pm

Hi,

Thanks for the feedback. The way I feel now is I am going to keep my own hair and cover what I have to with the wig. I really need the wig. Hair has already fallen out to such a degree and more keeps falling. Am really having an anxiety filled day today. I want a good wig to hide my scalp and hopefully make me feel like a person again. Have been admitting to everyone that I am finally dealing with my problem and I don't expect any hair to grow back again, EVER. I just want the wig so everyone can stop asking me what is wrong. I am a balding women, that is what is wrong. No, women don't have as much success with growing hair back, so I am dealing with it. I can't ever imagine shaving my head, but I trust all of you folks who have been dealing with this longer then me. You are all so very strong and amazing. Saying a prayer now that I can get myself through this. No PITYING looks from anyone, this happens to people. Sorry for the ranting but I am freaked out today and needed to vent.

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Permalink Reply by Mindy on October 4, 2013 at 5:10pm

How long have you had alopecia? And no worries about ranting!! We all have those days. I about shaved my head a couple of nights ago because I was so frustrated. Also do you already have a wig? Buying a wig helped me out because I knew that I had a back up plan waiting on me...

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Permalink Reply by purplemainst on October 5, 2013 at 7:40am

Hi,

Don't know, all I know is hair had been falling for a long time now and finally it stopped being able to be covered up and no I cannot lie to myself it wasn't happening. Have a horrible hair piece that was the wrong direction to go and another expensive bill for a bonding topper which I refused to get once I realized the process. Trying to find a safe place with compassion to find a wig that will work for me. Having a very difficult time making this step. I don't know, I thought I would find some relief in this process that I could hide my problem and start to rebuild my self esteem, but that is not happening. Doctor appoints are made to be advised officially I am going to be a bald women. Have to take these steps to move one (hopefully) Oh, this is soooo much harder then I ever imagined.

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