Alopecia World
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How do you deal
Good Morning . I'm so grateful for this site because like all walks of life if you're not the one wearing the shoes , you won't fully understand. I say that to ask how do you all deal with loved ones who fail at having compassion or the slightest sensitivity to your alopecia journey. My mother and my sister have very beautiful hair and although yes it was a little hard growing up you get over it you appreciate them and admire their hair with them because well you love them it'd be wrong to be envious or jealous. However what about when you see how much they admire they're hair to the point it pretty much confirms that to them hair is still a big deal. My sister recently cut her hair off to go natural. I hear her mention how she felt/feels she wouldn't attract any guy since she cut her hair off. She's 20 , I've even seen dialogue between her and her friends jokingly saying bald head this no hair that, not about me but still theyre a reflection of each other. I told my mom that's really shallow of her considering my place. The funny part was my mom said "she's young, that's unfair to her to get mad at her for having something you don't" I understood she didn't understand that wasnt the case . It was my sisters heart in it . It was the fact she sounded like those children from my elementary school when my hair first fell out. So it puzzled me that My sister who was around at that time of it first falling out , now being an adult still make the very same comments and Lets not forget it's my own sister . For some reason my soul , no disrespecting her , could not agree with my mom's logic on the situation. It was like I woke up to some ugly truth that despite my own growth my own sister and mother did not truly accept me. So yes if any of you all have any similar experiences how did you all successfully and positively deal with it. The last thing I want to do is look at my family that way.
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Tom on
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That's a good question. How do we cope. I've lived with AU for forty years. Sometimes I've coped well and other times not at all. I had many years of traumatic events before The AU started. I cope the best way I know which is pretty much getting up every time I get knocked down. Right now is one of my not so well periods. I have a question if anyone out there has felt with this as long as I have. If so please tell me what you do it. I know the site has many new-comers but if there are no long term people how do the new people learn?
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Permalink Reply by Return_life on
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I know people having AU for 1 year and others for more than 50 years... how do they cope?
lol... nobody is really okay with this condition. I mean yes from time to time you will see someone who says confidence is sexy or bald is beautiful... lol but in reality u will have some periods when u don't think too much about it and other periods when you will be very self conscious and very depressed. 2016, like it or not but your look is a major advantage in life (job, social, dating etc...)
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Thanks for the reply. I agree with you when you said sometimes it doesn't bother you and sometimes it does.It is also easier for men than women.We draw less attention. I'm not saying it is easy because it's not. In my case age has helped. I could care less what people think. I'm 59 and women my age usually think your ok if you have all your own teeth and don't wear depends. OK that was a joke but there is some truth there. It was very hard to hang on many times over the years but I did. And it does get better with time. I feel empathy for you younger folks. Just keep hanging on. Who knows they may find a cure for this some day. Don't want to miss that.
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