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Offended at work
I never had a problem wearing a turban with a scarf to work at my previous employer which did happen to be a non-profit organization. I've been in a new position now for awhile and it is in the corporate world so I do take into consideration they do things a little (or a lot) differently. I do, at times, have to see the public and meet and greet clients but on this particular day everyone was out of the office and I decided to wear my turban with a dressy scarf. It is, in my eyes, still very professional and my dress was still work attire. However, today my boss told me that it was inappropriate and told me that I could not wear it again, in other words, and I asked this, I have to wear a wig. Has anyone else had to confront this because I am struggling. I have had Alopecia for 34 years and have never had this happen. It was very hurtful and offensive. I normally wear a ball cap and bandana when I'm not at work and I can see that a ball cap may not be appropriate in this setting but this was a turban with a nice scarf.
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Laurie Rubin on
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Would your boss prefer you not wear anything on your head at all? No turban or wig? After all, do they require balding or bald men to wear wigs or covers on their heads? No. So why should you be required to do so just because you are a woman? I would most certainly be offended by his comments. Thing is, if you try to make an issue of it you may end up losing in the long run. Win the battle but lose the war thing. Perhaps you could eventually seek employment elsewhere and make sure this will not be an issue with your new employer before you are hired. I'm sure there are a lot of companies out there that would not consider this a problem at all. In the meantime, you might talk to HR as Tim has suggested.
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I too am very sorry this happened to you. My first thought when I read your post was that your boss saw the turban and thought 'Muslim!'. Yes, that is ignorant and ill informed but there are a lot of people out there like that these days. And if you asked him I'm sure he would say that he's not the bigoted one, that he just worries about what clients might think.
What did you wear before this? I mean did he object to scarves?
Myself I wear wigs every day. My hair loss is mostly in the front and the sides, kind of a weird mullet so to speak.
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This sounds really bad on your employer, I think. As long as you dress and act professionally I can't see how it could have a problem. Ask to see policy and procedure guidelines. If it's not listed under dress code as not permissable then this is making up rules as you go, and therefore just an opinion. I'd ask to see it in print.
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Permalink Reply by Sharon Beckham Hinson on
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Permalink Reply by Mary on
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Is that covered under the Americans with Disabilities Act in some way? I mean, if you need to cover your head in a variety of flattering ways, can they prevent you? Alternatively, if they would not want a female with a bald head exposed, would they fire bald men or require toupees for them? In other words, is there some sexual discrimination going on?
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Permalink Reply by Brandy on
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I work at a public university. When I asked Human Resources if a hat or head scarf could be a reasonable accomodation for alopecia, the response was "yes" in less than 5 minutes. None of my co-workers have issues with me wearing a turbin or head scarf, and often compliment me on how my head covering matches my clothes.
Sorry to hear about your troubles at work. I suggest consulting an ADA (Americans With Disabilities Act) specialist. I've heard that alopecia is covered.
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Question .... do you think your boss would tell aa Muslim woman wearing a turban that it's inappropriate attire? If not, it's discrimination.
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Permalink Reply by Sunflower25 on
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I would have walked straight from that conversation to HR.
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Thanks to all for your replies and I look forward to reading others. I really appreciate your feedback. I wanted to give a little more detail now that it's been a couple of days and I've had a chance to think through things and work through my emotions. This company is a small financial firm and when I started there a year ago it was just me and the CEO and now we have one other adviser on staff. When I came in there was no HR manual, policies or procedures. That was part of my job to write all of those which I did last year. I did go back and look at the HR manual and there is a small section about dress code, none of which mentioned anything regarding head coverings of any type. There was also another section regarding accommodations and that didn't really address anything related either. I have approached several people from my other company for which I still work for part-time and they confirmed that what I wore was professional. I do think what happened here is a case of discrimination and I think it just shows me that I need to get my support group started back up again to bring awareness to this subject. I don't know that we will ever get to a point where outward appearance does not create judgment on others and it's a shame. My best friend brought up a good point; she said she has seen what I have gone through the last 34 years to get where I am today and for one comment to be able to take me back a few steps is just inconsiderate. Well I'm not going to let it, I'm going to take a stand for myself and for others that may find themselves in a similar situation.
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I have actually lost jobs because of my alopecia. When the owner of the company came to the job sight and seen me he asked what the hell is up with him does he have cancer. One of the formin told him no he has alopecia and the owner asked is he worth a shit and my formin said he is one of my best guys. Needless to say that friday I got a determination slip. The reason on the slip was they where cutting back on employees. That same day the owner of the company called the union hall and asked for another person to be sent to the job. It was one of the most hurtful days I have ever had in my life. I worked harder than anyone on the job and was very good at my craft. But what one does not understand scares them I guess. It has been a down hill battle every since to get anyone to hire me because they all think I am sick or have cancer. I am even having problems getting a job in the medical field after going to school for Phlebotomy. It always seems to go to the person with the normal looks (hair). It has taking all pride I ever had along with the self confidence too. I hope thing goes better for you than they have for me.
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Permalink Reply by willow on
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I would like to say, that I have lost 2 jobs to Alopecia. Firstly, I worked for Fabricland, while doing cortisone shots. My Doctor had advised me that I was defeating the purpose by wearing a wig, as the hair was thin. So I braved it, removed the wig, and went to work with a thin, but cute pixie cut. Within 2 weeks, I... broken hearted, I had gone from a full time job, to 6 hrs. The boss said my look was not conducive to their idea of the salesclerk. By that time, I had been verbally assaulted by customers, to the degree that one said " that if she looked like me, she'd lock herself in her closet"! It was my breaking point, and I not only left my job, but also was so emotionally broken, that all the hair I had gained ...fell out!
The second job, was Canadian Tire. I was doing well, working almost full time on cash. We had our 6mth work evaluations, and I was rewarded with a 10% increase in pay. The next week, while at my hairdressing shop, the wig seller said to me, " your skin is so light, (probably due to the cortisone) that I should buy my next wig in a blonde color, rather than dark brown. Trying it on, I realize she was right, so I did so. The following week, I went to work, proudly at my cash dressed up in Blonde. Two weeks passed, and I noticed my pay raise wasn't paid, so I courageously knocked on the boss's door, and asked him, why. Well, he advised me, that he was just about to call me anyway....you see, the reason it wasn't on my pay, was I was being let go. Why....because he felt that due to the change in hair color, it now appeared that people knew I wore a wig, and the bosses felt that their was too much gossip going around 'about me'. So they felt it appropriate to get rid of the victim, rather than punish the culprits. So once again, I was unemployed, quite discouraged, and down right broken within, as this happened within a year of each other.
I hope my story helps those who may have had this experience, and it in some way...helps them in their journey with Alopecia. The world can be crude at times, it's not an excuse, however in my life, a fact! Blessings
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To bad you couldn't have had a witness to these actions taken against you. It is a major discrimination case.
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