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Ostracism
Looks like my 4 year old girl is being ostracized by some kids because of her alopecia. She herself is not aware yet that her problem with hair is a problem. How would you suggest I handle this issue? Thank you!
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Rose Marie' on
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Hi
It would depend on where this is happening. At school/preschool, I would talk to the Carers/Teachers and explain what you have noticed. Education in these areas with little children really helps.
If it is closer to home. Children she plays with in your neighbourhood. Maybe inviting them over to play one at a time may help. Usually children this age are not intentionally being cruel....they may not understand why your daughter looks a little different. Again education is key here.
If I can help in any way please feel free to come in and chat to me.
Rosy
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Permalink Reply by Cindie on
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Homeschool her. Don't allow her to be traumatized at such a young age. She'll carry those emotional scars for the rest of her life.
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I'm sorry but I don't agree. Sheltering her away from the world is not the answer. Teach her to be happy with who she is and to not be defined by what others think of her. She will have to deal with this her whole life. Equip her with confidence and strategies to deal with these situations. I also agree that education is key.
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Hi Lesya,
I am so sorry to hear about your little girl. That is absolutely terrible. I would like to give you some information on my non-profit organization which is Wigs for Kids (www.wigsforkids.org). The organization has been around for over 35 years and we specialize in helping children who have lost their hair from Alopecia or other medical/non medical reasons. Wigs for Kids would work with you and your daughter to get her a free custom made hair system.
My thoughts and prayers for you and your daughter!
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thank you very much! I don't think we are there yet, most of the time she doesn't even want to wear pretty hats or hairbands (for decoration, not support). but I sincerely appreciate the link, I will hold on to it!
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Hi,
As a mom of a daughter whose alopecia started when she was 3.5yrs old I totally understand what u feel. I had the same fears, but ddcided to be honest with my daughter . In 2 months she went from head full of hair to no hair. I explained to her how her body was unique and how her immune system which keeps away colds is also keeping hr hair from growing. Some people can't see, some can't hear, some don't have hair, but she is still beautiful and most loved baby. When kids wd ask/ say something, she wd tell them that he had boo boo in her hair, but that's ok. Give her strength and confidence to face others and equip her with information so that she can explain to them. All the best.
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Out kids are extra special cos now they will have compassion and understanding towards anyone who is different. That is one of the good things alopecia teaches them.
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thank you! I tried to talk to her about her hair, but I don't think I had the guts to really face her with this nor did she seem to care that much ( which I doubt is actually true). I like the way you explained it, so if you don't mind I might plagiarize at least in part :)
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Permalink Reply by MsLadyT80 on
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Talk with the teacher and school admin and see if there could be a lesson explaining what alopecia is and how name calling and bullying hurts kids.
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Permalink Reply by amym on
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NAAF has some good videos for kids to watch on "why I lost my hair" that you can show them at a play date or have their parents watch with them. They are free. I agree, education for the kids ostracizing her is so important.
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This is a hard thing and my daughter was teased as well. You can't control how others treat her all the time so try to equip her with tools for how she reacts. Try to teach her how to have a thick skin and your hair doesn't define you as a person. It's not easy and as parents we just want to protect them. My daughter found her self confidence back after her hair loss when she started playing soccer and was really good at it. Maybe you can help her gain her self confidence by getting her involved in an activity that she's good at?
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