Alopecia World
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Ready to get rid of it all
Hi there!
I've been dealing with alopecia on and off for almost the last 2 years. While I've never lost all my hair, it just seems to continue to recur. I'm convinced that it's likely stress in my life that triggers it in motion. It seems that the only thing that has helped is squaric acid and focusing really hard on trying to calm my anxiety. Unfortunately, it didn't last and it has falred up again. I'm pulling out hair by the handfuls.
I feel like the obsession with having or not having hair is weighing heavily on my life and all my relationships and am seriously contemplating just shaving it all off to prove to myself that I don't need it.
Unfortunately, I am in the middle of job searching and feel like I would need to wear a wig to get through it.
At what point and how do you just finally accept and embrace it knowing that it will likely be around the rest of your life?
Feeling at a loss...
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by fijifrangipani on
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Shaving certainly males life more comfortable if you do chose to wear a wig, but the biggest thing is it takes back some control. Rather than waiting to see if it it is all going to fall out, grow back or whatever, shaving allows you to make one of the few choices you have in this process. I started shaving for the comfort it gave me when wearing a wig, but I also love the feel and look, and now I dont bother with wigs at all and have lived with alopecia so long. I can reccomend getting a good wig if youa re going to wear it to work. I have had 2 real hair wigs from freedom wigs and only wore them while I worked. I am now self employed and dont bother at all now.
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Permalink Reply by laura on
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i definately felt more calm and in control after i shaved my hair off,now i wear comfy scarfs most of the time and i forget that i dont have hair.i actually surprised myself as i asked my best friend to shave it because i thought id be really upset.....but the shocker was i felt better without this paranoia of making sure my spots were covered and all the time and effort put into my hair care. i made it a little easier for myself by wearing scafs over my hair with a little hair peeking out for a while before i shaved it off so it wasnt such a drastic change,now if my hair grows back i just accept it and if it feels like falling out again then so be it,im happy with my collection of scarfs and wigs so the worry of hair is defo gone.....much less stressfull. keep in touch and let us know how it goes x
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Permalink Reply by Devin on
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Im glad I shaved my hair off one of the best things about it was just seeing all of the hair every where would make me depressed and now I dont think about that much. Well whatever you decide Good Luck!
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Permalink Reply by Mary on
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See my before and after day of shaving photos on my page (earliest photos). I felt SO much better after taking charge and shaving it off. I didn't get depressed every day picking up hair from the floor, and stopped obsessively checking the expansion of the bald areas. It was just gone! Then I had to begin dealing with being a bald woman, and wearing a wig - or not. But, for me, it was a big improvement and I felt like I was back in control of my life. Good luck. And, check out the wonderful AW group - Sisterhood of Women Who Shaved Their Heads.
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Permalink Reply by Alliegator on
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Hi! I was in your same shoes at one point. First, I started wearing wigs. Then after I stopped paying attention to my bio hair, I decided to cut it short then shorter. Then I bought clippers to give myself a buzz cut. Then I got a razor and now I shave it. I have been shaving my head for about a year now, and I wouldn't go back. The first time I ever did it, I felt so liberated! I would suggest it for sure! Maybe start with a buzz cut and go from there. I think it will help for sure!
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Permalink Reply by Jennifer on
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I so appreciate everyone's help! No spots are showing as of yet...even though they are definitely there, it's just the waiting game that is the hardest, but I am learning to face my fears and know I will not let this beat me.
My haridresser did mention something called a wiglet that I can use to cover if needed until I decide to get rid of it all. Maybe it's just delaying the inevitable.
I will keep you updated with the progress...:)
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Permalink Reply by Gabriela Gonzalez on
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Hi,
So I totally understand what you are going through. I shaved my hair off about a month ago. It was difficult, but honestly I realized that it was harder for me to see it fall off everyday then it was to just accept that I will always have this. I still hope that it might grow back, but I was too stressed out watching it fall off. I have accepted that I will always have this, that does not mean I am ok with it I still have a lot of bad days but when I shaved my hair off it was kind of like I was taking control of the situation. Wearing wigs is not amazing, but it beats worrying that the wind is going to expose all my bald spots. I am currently trying my hardest to find a job in NYC, and wear my wigs to the interviews. I am a little anxious wearing them because I feel like people might be able to tell its a wig. Some people can, but most people can't or at least they pretend like they don't which I guess is good enough for me. Everyone learns to accept it and embrace it at different times and in different ways, some people never embrace it but accept it and some people might not do either. I personally accepted it when I shaved my head, and am now learning how to love myself with or without it. You have to figure out how you are going to accept it and how and when you will learn to embrace it. And is you ever need to talk I am here. Best of luck on the job hunt.
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Permalink Reply by asdf234 on
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I feel like my hair is like some kind of disloyal and fickle boyfriend. It's so frustrating trying to hang on to what's left. I can't stand watching it slowly abandon me. I am tired of caring whether it stays or goes. Shaving it off means that I get to take back control. To move on, I gotta let go of wanting to control it. It is what it is. Caring about it and being disappointed again and again is no way to live.
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