I'm crying as I write this. I'm 24 and I'm losing my hair. And I'm sorry for the long post.

Although doctors have told me that it's a waste of time getting it officially confirmed, it seems more than likely that I have PCOS following an ultrasound last year.

At first I didn't think it was such a big deal, but then my hair started falling out last July.

It might even have been before that, as I was convinced that it was thinner, but I hadn't noticed any abnormal hair shedding. But I went to my usual hairdresser and asked about it, and she admitted to me that yes, it did look thinner than normal. And throughout the whole of August, September (during which the family holiday was ruined as every time I swam in the pool, huge wads of hair would come out and tangle around everyone) and October, I felt like I was going mad as I tried to figure out what was causing it while constantly being told I was just being paranoid by my boyfriend and my family, who all said it was exactly the same as always, that I was just losing a bit more than normal because it was summer. It was so frustrating and heart-breaking that those closest to me simply denied what I knew to be true, and it was made even worse by the fact that my mum had severe shedding from antibiotics and hers came back so she believed she knew best and that mine would come back too, AND the fact that my sister had to undergo chemotherapy and lost all her hair (which has now grown back). I feel so superficial at times, complaining about my hair when she went through what she did, but I can't help it.

Anyway, I know myself, I know what's normal and what isn't. I went to the doctors and they all frowned and told me that PCOS doesn't cause hair loss (which made me lose total faith in them, as it does), but they agreed to refer me to a dermatologist, who thought it could be telogen effluvium, and so she prescribed me with Elocon. I used it religiously, and it did nothing to help the hair grow back.

I was then put on spironolactone as the same dermatologist grudgingly said it could be down to PCOS, but she wasn't sure. The spironolactone also did nothing except for making me pee loads and thus interrupted my sleep, as I couldn't take it during the day because of work. I stopped taking it.

Eventually my family and boyfriend admitted that they could now see the problem, that my hair was constantly covering everything around the house, clogging the hoover, etc etc., that my hair looked thin. It was a bit of a relief, but on the other hand it made me feel worse as maybe it was becoming noticeable to those who didn't even know what to look for.

I then saw a different dermatologist and she said it's definitely not telogen effluvium, that it's classic androgenetic alopecia despite it not being in my family, and basically to get over it and buy some minoxidil, and to also change my birth control pill as my idiot doctor had me on one that had androgens in it.

So I've changed the pill to Yasmin and my hair seems to be worse than ever, but I've been on it for less than a month so hopefully this will change. I just don't know where to go from here. I even had my hair cut for the first time in a year as I dreaded going, getting it cut a lot shorter, but it hasn't helped and it still lays flat and limp, without any of the lovely natural waves I had before.

I'm scared to start minoxidil because I don't want to have to do it for the rest of my life, I don't want to risk the side effects and to use chemicals every day on my body, and I'm dreading the initial shed period because I'm going to start a teaching course in a few weeks and I don't want the kids to notice and bully me.

I'm so scared about minoxidil but I also don't want to have to wear wigs, which I believe will inhibit my life in so many ways...I won't want to swim anymore, or go out in the rain or wind, go fishing, do any kind of exercise thanks to the unbearable heat underneath... They're just so uncomfortable.

I'm also worried my boyfriend will get so fed up of me complaining about the situation and feeling down so much that he'll just not be able to cope anymore. I know he won't leave me due to the hair loss itself; we got together just as it was starting, when the relationship was new and maybe not as strong as it is now, but he stayed knowing everything. I just feel so down some days, like I don't get enthusiastic to see him, I don't want to be affectionate, and I'm just trapped in my own world, thinking about my hair. It steals the focus from other things so much, things that I should be looking forward to or just boring work that I should be getting on with but can't.

No-one else around me really understands. They do their best but they don't get it, and I don't feel close enough or brave enough with my friends to tell them about it. They all have such beautiful hair and then there's me, feeling like some sort of skull from a horror movie with dead hair attached. Even if I told them, what can they do? They wouldn't understand it either.

I suppose the point of this post is like my own therapy, and I'd really like to hear from other people that have the same problem as me so that we can support one another. 

If anyone has any tips or advice, please share.

Thanks for reading...