URGENT advice- transition from hair to wig

hi everyone! im a girl in high school and i have alopecia totalis (although i do have a tiny amount of hair left) and i just got a wig yesterday and im wearing it to school tomorrow.

i know people are going to notice because i went from having very little hair to A LOT. and kids can be cruel and im very uncomfortable telling people that its a wig so please do not try to comfort me into telling the people that ask that its a wig. my parents told me that if i dont feel comfortable with saying that its a wig, i could lie about it, since its a touchy subject.

so should i say i got a hair thickening treatment (since i have a lot more hair now haha) and does any one have any stories or ideas? it would mean the world to me if you helped me! thank you for listening to my story and have a great day :)

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Permalink Reply by Rose Marie' on September 30, 2013 at 12:56am

Hi

This is a difficult thing to do and a real concern for anyone changing their wig or beginning to wear a wig.

I tend to agree with your parents about saying how it is...but you really can only do that if you feel totally supported in the school environment. Does your teacher know about your condition and is she someone you feel you could trust??

When my daughter did this at 12...I prepared her and the school and made sure that everyone was aware of the situation. You really need to be empowered through this rather than frightened but that will only come when you feel comfortable about talking about it and comfortable and knowledgeable about your ability to handle this situation.

Keep talking to Mum and Dad and tell them what your fears are. Bullying is a real issue and I would never disregard its effect...but if you are supported in every way possible this needn't happen.

The thing is this is really up to you and how you want to do it.

When my daughter was 13 she didn't want to tell her school or her friends (she had gone to high school and it was a more annonymous environment for her). She kept the secret for about 6 months, during that time I use to periodically talk to her and ask her how the secret was working for her. In the end ...it wasn't working it caused her more anxiety than having alopecia. So we got a lady with alopecia (beautiful Martine) to go to her school with me and her dad and explain to her class what alopecia was and how we expected Libby to behave and how we expected others to behave to her. This really empowered Libby as it was her decision, but she felt supported through it all.

It wasn't perfect she did have to hold her own with a few nasty kids...but they all knew that everyone was on to them and bad behaviour was stopped very quickly. She became confident and did well at school becoming a prefect in her last year of high school.

Anna... really think about this. I can see you are a smart young woman. Think about what you need to do and how others can help you with it.

Good luck with everything.

Rosy

Permalink Reply by Karen Smith on October 3, 2013 at 9:21am

Hi Anna, My daughter lost her hair in high school and going into a wig was a very difficult transition. How is it going for you? I am happy to report that no one has made fun of her at least not to her face and she has a great group of friends. She usually avoids the question when asked. You can friend me a I will send you the info on the wigs that work best for her.

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