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What scares you most about alopecia?
Dealing with alopecia has been quite up and down for me, psychologically, since it started. At first, my big fear was simply 'HAIR FALLING OUT'. Now that it's progressed further and I have sort of come to realise that it truly is an unpredictable condition, my emotions have changed. I'm at a point where I don't quite need a wig, or to shave my head, but my hair loss is at an extent where concealing it is a daily duty.
I hate how I currently look. I can't wear my hair down any more, I can only style it one way, and I haven't dared get the colour done (my roots are so beyond awful) or get it trimmed or cut. What was once my crowning glory now makes me feel rubbish!
But now, my biggest fear isn't of being bald.... it's the transition that is scaring me. I see people with AU or shaved heads on here, and I think they are truly beautiful and glowing. But what worries me daily is - when and how will I explain it to people??? My boss, my colleagues, my housemates, my friends - people I haven't seen for a while??? That first initial day of going into the office in a wig/scarf/bald head... Dealing with the questions, whispers, looks. And I really hate the idea of people feeling sorry for me! I know the best way to avoid that, is to hold my head high, be confident, and not make a big deal of it. But that is easier said than done right now!
I have tried to explain this fear to a close friend who doesn't have alopecia. She said I shouldn't worry - as it might not happen. True - I could stop shedding tomorrow, who knows? (I'll still hate my hair in its present state though!)
But the point is, that doesn't reassure me - because it COULD happen. Part of me wants to delay it for as long as possible but a big part of me just wants to get it over with!!!! Because right now it hangs over me like a dark cloud.
I thought I'd start this board so people can share their particular fears - I wonder if lots of people feel the same?? Or if anybody who has done the whole 'journey' has any tips for dealing with specific phases of hair loss?
Thanks x
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Susan Innes on
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Hi Paty- Thanks for the beautiful message about the brave little girl, and one of the humorous aspects of the disease. My friends have a difficult time remembering the correct medical term so they often resort to "some disease" which is better than "Fox Mange" which is the English translation of the Greek word. I'll now refer to it (and myself--alopecian) as the "Italian Dish"....enormously better than "Fox Mangian" (or "Cheesehead" as we Wisconsinites are often called:). Hugs, Susan
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Permalink Reply by Norm on
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Well, now I'm REALLY confused. I'd have thought it was good for the ego to be called "foxy"? - but hey, if you prefer "dishy".... there again, maybe they're both a bit "cheesy" :)
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Norm...women adore you; don't fret the small stuff. And, we must love to keep you confused or we wouldn't be so good at it:).
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Ahhh, Sooz, they may well adore me, but they can't afford me. And anyway, it behooves me to keep them at arm's length, in case they discover just what the small stuff I'm fretting about actually is..... ahem.
In the meantime, keep the adoration coming - it's ace for the ego. In a mutual kinda way, obviously. ;)
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Permalink Reply by Liz on
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Probably everyone on this site has had worries about what people will say. Having showed up at work with many different wigs over the years, it's usually not a big deal to anyone else, except me. The best thing you can do is find a solution that you feel good about. If you feel comfortable, other people will probably feel comfortable being around you. Most people will not say anything, and may not even notice. Some people will probably complement you on your lovely hairdo. A few may ask about your wig, but that probably won't happen very often.
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