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Why aren't men attracted to bald women?
This is the most fustrating part about being bald. If you're not already dating or married than there's no hope of finding a mate. Not talking about meeting with a wig then revealing afterwards about being bald. I mean being a proud bald women and having a man still find you attractive and sexy as if you had a head full of hair. Where are these men?
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Cindie on
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Angie, I hear exactly what you are saying, and I believe, that living in conservative Central Pa is a major problem for me, in so many areas. Yet, I'm almost 23 years into a 25 year career, and I can't change the location, and the career not "transferable."
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Permalink Reply by Mallory Crowner on
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These men are all over! I am happily married, but receive compliments on my au naturel look all of the time. Hair doesn't make you beautiful...
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Permalink Reply by Pedro Costa on
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well, i'll try to go to the next NAAF...i'm looking forward to meet beautiful bald ladies!!!
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Permalink Reply by Fulvio982 on
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As a 29 years old man... I am alopecian, universalis type since four years and I've to say it's not about being bald as a woman. It's the same problem also for guys. The fact is that human being find usually attractive who looks like the people going around and THIS is the problem. I'm not talking specifically about tv or ads where they shows us impossible situations with absurd good looking people. It's the fact that what usually we find attractive is what usually see in this age. A very good looking woman in the 1500 year, would not be as attractive as we usually find a woman in the 2011. Just cause we are not used to compare them in the same way.
This is not a MAN problem, it's a human being problems as animals beetwen themself. Even animals follow their rules to be attracted by them so do we.
And also bald man have got more difficult time than good looking men with hairs.. maybe not as difficult as bald woman cause they are usually less bald then men and people are not used to see it as a usual option.
By the way talking about MY point of view, I've to say I do find bald woman attractive, not everyone anyeay. Cause it depends from other things like shape of head, eyes, body.. just like there're wonderful women with very short hairs and others that for other reason could not attract me in the same way. So for baldness is the same thing I think.
Being completely bald as a man, I did have difficult time to find a sort of self esteem to appear secure and calm in the society and I do have difficult time to find a partner that convince me she loves me really as I am. But I think the same thing you're talking, we as alopecian men are living in the same way.
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Permalink Reply by Cheryl, Co-founder on
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HI Fulvio, There is always going to be that man or woman, who is looking for something different. I am sure my husband loves the fact that men surprising find me attractive. I can see it in his eyes when we are all dressed up and we walk into an event. He is no doubt very proud to be by my side and it gives him a smile when others see it too. I am not saying that I am some kind of beauty. But my look is different enough to draw some attention.
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Your funny jack :)
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Permalink Reply by MiNAH on
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This is about perception once again. This time it's not about others perceiving people without hair ... it's about us thinking in terms of judgment and becoming quite opinionated due to insecurity of self. After all when we judge, in believing that men do not feel attracted to a bald woman ... it is only our own opinion and insecurity messing with our head. There are men who are attracted to women without hair. I had a husband who wasn't attracted to me being bald, and when I finally realized all our problems stemmed from his own insecurity ... I decided to end the marriage. It was the best decision I ever made in my entire life. I became liberated! This means we are once again our own worst enemies ... when we judge others judging us. We spend way too much time worrying over irrelevant issues pertaining to hair loss. How we think is how we connect with the world. When a woman with Alopecia defines herself by not having hair, as well as not focusing on her own unique attributes ... she will crumble. Unfortunately we cripple our own minds by destructive thoughts and self loathing. Anger over the way others perceive, judge, and see us. So rather than embracing all the attention in a negative mind frame, embrace your difference and decide to follow a new way of thinking. Use the mind games you tell yourself to give strength and power to a situation you have absolutely no control over. Use the looks and heartache endured to create resilience. Face your own destructive daemons. When you give up this thinking pattern Pebbles ... you shall open up an entirely new chapter of understanding life without hair/Alopecia. Men will be drawn to you, and hair won't even be an issue. Like minded, draws like minded. Your own energy shall either fulfill you ... of leave you drained. This is why I live without head covering. I cannot for a minute change my life for the lack of knowledge or lack of understanding others may have about hairlessness. I have met amazing men in my life. So just try to work on being you and do not worry about what men think. They will enter your life.
First you need to let all perceptions go and work on you!
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Very interesting MiNAH, I have always tried to follow, "be transformed by the renewing of your mind" It is the foolproof method, but it is hard to get there. It takes a lot of work to challenging your thoughts. With the thought of men being attracted to a bald woman I was WAY off and when I really go it -- things opened up. All of a sudden people (including men) that I thought were starring at me because of lack of hair, were starring at me because of my lack of hair. But, the reason was so far off from what I though they were thinking. I never use to make eye contact, after when I did. I notice I got nods or words of approval. When you are being yourself, people will take notice. What may seem like a hindrance can truly become a distinction -- if you let it.
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Permalink Reply by Tallgirl on
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Take A Giant Step
lyrics by Carole King & Gerry Goffin
Though you've played at love and lost,
And sorrow's turned your heart to frost,
I will melt your heart again.
Remember the feeling as a child
When you woke up and morning smiled?
It's time you felt like you did then.
There's just no percentage in remembering the past,
It's time you learned to live again at last.
Come with me, leave yesterday behind,
And take a giant step outside your mind.
You stare at me in disbelief,
And say for you there's no relief,
But I swear I'll prove you wrong.
Don't sit in your lonely room
Just staring back in silent gloom,
That's not where you belong.
Come with me, I'll take you where the taste of life is green,
Each and every day holds wonders to be seen.
Come with me, leave yesterday behind,
And take a giant step outside your mind.
Come with me, I'll take you where the taste of life is green,
Each and every day holds wonders to be seen.
Come with me, leave yesterday behind,
And take a giant step outside your mind.
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I have always had eye contact with people. Being bald never changed this in me. I don't think about it. "However" on the odd occassion I will be drawn to the discomfort of a particular person and I will force myself to look directly at them and smile! Sometimes they uncomfortably smile back, other times that person might bow their head down or turn away as though they didn't notice me acknowledge them. This is rare, yet it does happen. In the end just go on about your life without a thought focusing on ourself.
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