Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by julietdawn on January 28, 2009 at 7:05pm

Before my daughter chose to wear wigs/cover up we used to get lots of people coming up to us and asking if she had cancer. I am glad you raised this, because I couldn't get my head around how awful it would be to have to deal with cancer (lets face it, alopecia is bad enough but at least it's not life threatening!) let alone have complete strangers ask about it.
I used to get rather annoyed at people who shaved their hair off for cancer charities ... I guess that was my over sensitivity at the time, although I admit I still feel rather uncomfortable with that idea. Maybe it was because it was big hairy biker types who would grow a mullet in a week *lol* (bless 'em)

Permalink Reply by Derek on October 23, 2008 at 5:35pm

I always wink and blow a kiss to whoever makes a rude comment or who just can't stop staring.

Permalink Reply by Lori on November 9, 2008 at 7:12pm

Depending on what kind of day I've had and what kind of mood I'm in determines how I react to people. My favorite "game" to play with soe folks is when they ask "Do you have cancer?" I just look at them and say "no" and give them no details as to what is wrong with me. I feel I shouldn't have to justify why I look the way I do.

Now if they push the envelope, and I've had people outright ask "Well, then what's wrong with you?" I've told them everything from "I should have listened to my mom when she said "don't stand in front of the microwave" to "You know, they really should have done more research on the long term effects of microwave frozen meals."

My philosophy, if you're going to pry into my personal life, I reserve the right to tell you whatever I feel.

Permalink Reply by julietdawn on January 28, 2009 at 7:01pm

That's a great philosophy, I can imagine their faces when you gave your microwave quip, good for you ;-)

There is no right or wrong in this, just do whatever feels right at the time and don't deliberate over it too long, it's their problem, not yours.

Permalink Reply by Jill on January 28, 2009 at 4:08pm

When I can tell that people say things out of curiousity I usually just ignore it. Before I wore my wig I had people ask me if I was a boy, if I was a swimmer or bicyclist and is that why I shaved my head, if I had cancer, and so many other things. I usually just said no and walked away. I was very young and uncomfortable educating people about alopecia. Now that I wear my wig I haven't had anyone approach me out of curiousity. Now when someone says something they do it because they are out right rude. Thankfully it doesn't happen very frequently but when it does I stand up for myself, and I put that person in their place. I'm not sure if that's the right thing for everyone to do but it's right for me.

Permalink Reply by Jennifer on January 28, 2009 at 9:22pm

good response! it doesn't shame him - just lets him know he doesn't know everything and that he should be grateful.

Permalink Reply by Tnabugg on April 2, 2009 at 11:41pm

I find that when people make fun of things that they do not understand. I've had little kids stare at me but I just ignore it. I've had a guy yell across the way that I was a freak.

If I have a music player with me.. I'm in my own world.

I guess it depends on what kind of mood you were in and maybe he will take your message to heart when someone he loves loses their hair and he'll remember your comment.

Being grateful for what we have and don't have is something I take to heart.

Tina