Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by Mary on May 24, 2009 at 12:28pm

I had no signs of alopecia until age 47, and I became AU about a year ago, though I shaved my head a few months before that. I had very upsetting dreams for the first 4-5 months that I was bald: I would dream that my hair suddenly grew back, and the joy I felt in the dreams was SO real, as dream emotions are. I would experience the wind blowing through my hair, or touch it. Then I'd wake up and realize it was a dream, and start crying.

I would also wake up in the middle of the night frequently and simply be hit by the realization that I'm bald, touch my head, and get upset all over again after weeks of not crying.

I'm happy to report that the "hair" dreams have stopped, as has the crying in the middle of the night. I go everywhere bald, and now dream of myself that way. Sometimes my baldness is an element in the dreams - I'm talking with people in public about being bald, as I often do. I think that accepting this "new me" was the key to the bad dreams ending. They seemed to stop at about the time I quit trying to wear a wig and started going out bald. I also think the dreams were part of my mourning process for the loss of my hair.

p.s. I also still do the wringing-out in the shower bit, though. ( ;-)

Permalink Reply by Felicia Graham on May 24, 2009 at 5:38pm

I use to have to straighten my hair all the time. I could never get it wet because then it would get all frizzy. Sometimes I have the thought "Oh no my hair". Then I remember I don't have any hair.

Permalink Reply by Kami M. on May 24, 2009 at 5:48pm

Thanks for all the response's, I now know that I'm not alone :) Not all exactly the same, but very similar.

Permalink Reply by Ray on May 26, 2009 at 9:10am

I think that loosing you hair quickly is much better than loosing it slowly. Having dreams about having hair is quite common and we all have different views on how we feel about that. To me waking up and having hair is more frightining than waking up and having none.

I love being AU.

Permalink Reply by Mary on May 26, 2009 at 10:15am

Besides the physical discomfort of them, I think that a big reason I stopped trying to wear a wig was the psychological effect of seeing myself in "hair" again. I'd be going along, feeling comfortable with my bald look, then if I wore a wig and saw myself in it, I'd get all sad and miss my hair and have bad dreams again.

Permalink Reply by Diane on May 26, 2009 at 9:54pm

I've been AU since the last 7 years. It happened over a 3 day period, when I was 33 yo... even if I was AA before, it was a traumatic event... and I remember waking up and thinking about how my hairs will look then just realized, oups.. I'm bald....

Interestingly, after that lost, I've stopped seeing myself in my dream (with or without hair) for about 5 years... did'nt not realized that until I see me again, about a year ago... .this time, I was bald.... I guess it was the time I needed to start to accept my new image.

Permalink Reply by JeffreySF on May 29, 2009 at 11:11pm

Good one Kami!!!
I remember this happening a couple years ago. I thought I was having a bad dream for months. The funny thing is the other night I had a dream I was out and it was very windy and I remembered running my fingers through my hair which was blowing everywhere. It was a few inches long and quite the scene....I never grew my hair like that. lol

Permalink Reply by Kami M. on May 30, 2009 at 7:03am

lol I've had dreams like that, like the hair that I had in my dream was nothing hair I have ever had before. Long Dark curly hair..makes me giggle. Thx for sharing Jeffrey and it's nice to share a laugh :)

Permalink Reply by Craig Logie on July 11, 2009 at 1:26pm

I've been totally bald for going on 5 years now and when I dream, my dream self still has hair and the goatee beard I wore for so many years.

I have woken up some mornings still with the dream at the forefront of my mind and wandered into the bathroom to get a sudden realisation that it WAS just a dream.

You're really not the only one. I still run my fingers down the side of my head as I used to do to get my hair out from being trapped under the leg of my glasses and tuck it behind my ear when it was thick.

Permalink Reply by Katie Steel on July 26, 2009 at 7:20pm

I lost my hair at 37, within 3 months all my hair was gone everywhere! It was a sad time for me. I went to local Drs. as well as the Cleveland Clinic to see if I could get help but it never grew back. Just some fuzz but no real growth. I wear Peggy Knight hair pieces and false eyelashes when I go out in the evening but I have had it for 22 years and I use to be really good about the eyelashes for the first 15 years but than I decided to relax about it. I had my eyebrows tatooed. That works really well for me. I guess they call it permanent makeup. Be interested if anyone has had AU for a long time. Also if anyone has found any good eyelashes.

Permalink Reply by Luciana Lépore on September 26, 2010 at 9:36pm

hi, some times my dreams are all focused on my hair, the one I do not have, a different color, style, or cut. but it is all I can see, this happens when I´m stress out
you learn to live with the bad days, and really enjoy the good days

Permalink Reply by Shannon on November 23, 2010 at 10:43pm

I know how you feel. There is a solution. I just got a Feedom Vaccum wig and It is awesome. Have you heard of them? You can wear a ponytail again with them. They are so real and they are made to fit you. I am wearing one in my pic. I even had it hilighted at the salon while I was wearing it. The website is newlifehair.com

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