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Letting go of the anger and why alopecia makes us sad...
Since I have some time on my hands before i get better and get a real job (just book keep and do shopping and stuff for parents business- a residential home). I can post a brighter more positive blog than the last one. I did debate whether to put that up because its the sad side of what alopecia can do to you; but if somebody reads it and realises to get help if you feel down then it was worth it.
I did have a bit of anger built up towards my parents because of alopecia and felt like damn it if only i had different genes then i wouldn't be going through this right now ( wonder if anyone else has felt this way..) But thats unfair on us who have it yes; but also guilt triping those who try and help and be there for us.
Alopecia totally hits self confidence and self worth that we neglect all else and can focus on it way too much. I mean so long as we have hair were normal right and its damn hard to be different in this world. (Homer Simpson wearing his pink shirt to work and feeling out of place for simpsons fans reading)
Alopecia not just sad in itself but also when it becomes an obstacle to achiving normal adult stuff like employment and relationships. But hey Buddhist monks don't have hair and marryand don't obsess about anything. Jesus Christ never had money and a hot wife and a life free from suffering and He was God's son (for believers). I saw a program on prison inmates and there was a guy who was in prison from 18-56 and is doing life and is at peace with himself. Not to say people can't get everything with alopecia because clearly people can its just a bit harder thats all.
I did have a bit of anger built up towards my parents because of alopecia and felt like damn it if only i had different genes then i wouldn't be going through this right now ( wonder if anyone else has felt this way..) But thats unfair on us who have it yes; but also guilt triping those who try and help and be there for us.
Alopecia totally hits self confidence and self worth that we neglect all else and can focus on it way too much. I mean so long as we have hair were normal right and its damn hard to be different in this world. (Homer Simpson wearing his pink shirt to work and feeling out of place for simpsons fans reading)
Alopecia not just sad in itself but also when it becomes an obstacle to achiving normal adult stuff like employment and relationships. But hey Buddhist monks don't have hair and marryand don't obsess about anything. Jesus Christ never had money and a hot wife and a life free from suffering and He was God's son (for believers). I saw a program on prison inmates and there was a guy who was in prison from 18-56 and is doing life and is at peace with himself. Not to say people can't get everything with alopecia because clearly people can its just a bit harder thats all.
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Comment by Lisa on August 16, 2008 at 8:04am
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I have felt that way! My mother has androgenitic alopecia and though I am not angry at her (she feels totaly responsible for my hair loss) I feel sad that I wish at times I did not end up with different genes. GUILTY. Why on earth would I ever want to be mad at my mom for something she would gladly take away for me? Catch 22. I feel ya. Alopecia is a tough lesson, if you believe that we are supposed to learn via what we go through. Acceptance and non-judgemental come to mind. Perhaps we should bestow that upon ourselves, if only we knew how.
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Comment by carl on August 16, 2008 at 10:16am
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your right accepting it is important, i have a sister who doesen't have it and feel no hard feelings towards her, i'm glad she doesen't have to go through it. I joked i could cut her hair and she'd know what its like she said she'd kill me. I believe her :)
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Comment by Tamara Dixon on August 16, 2008 at 4:47pm
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Hey Everybody
Accepting is important so why does it have to be so incredibly hard? Today I looked in the mirror as I got ready for church and felt so horrible, I just started to cry. I got my first lace cap wig and was feeling disappointed at how it looked (not like mine). In the car on the way to church I broke down again and my husband was at a total loss and tried to comfort me "It could be worse" but those words didnt help. I cant really express how I felt today but I am trying to accept my new look now, trying to accept my helplessness in this and trying not to totally lose my mind.
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Yeah days are better than others. I listen to creed (a religious band) song 'what's this life for' a positive song that makes me realise all suffering is temporary with lyrics like 'we all live under the reign of one king'. Best advice i got was keep yourself occupied-exercise, walk, tv shows. You don't want the hair to effect your body and take its toll on your face too. As soon as you feel bad immediately thinkof something to do . I don't think about it when I'm watching a show like Dexter, or hitting the punch bag. I'm too tired to feel bad after that and i've released any frusration. It can be hard to find motivation but in all inspiring films the key moment is when the character can take the easy way out or fight back. It's difficult when you feel your the only one in your family toughing it out, but I'm the only one too in like the 30+ relatives I can think off. God only knows why He made it harder for us but keep going and we all can kick back and relax in Heaven one day.
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yep focusing on the negatives is pointless much worse things out there than alopecia in life.
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