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A Great Quote!
I heard this on some home and garden TV show today, but I feel like it really applies to all of us here who are dealing with some form of alopecia....especially if at one point you had hair and unexpectedly lost it.
"Let go of your old self image so you can start loving yourself as you are today."
This quote really stuck with me. One of the hardest things about having female pattern baldness for me has been remembering how thick and blonde my hair used to be and how many compliments I would get on it. Watching it fall out has made me feel less attractive and desirable over the years. Sometimes I feel as though I'm in competition with the way I used to look, if that makes any sense. Like I'm not sure if I still measure up physically. It may sound silly, but it's a demon I've battled. I'm happy to say that I've gotten infinitely better about it though. I don't feel like a shadow of the girl I used to be anymore.
I feel like the quote is very true. Although losing our hair may be (and for most of us, is) a very heavy burden to carry, we are still the same people we've always been - and we are still worthy of all the love and affection in the world. This may not be the answer to the pain we've felt, but it's a good start.
Alexandra =)
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Comment by Alexandra on February 28, 2010 at 10:50pm
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Isn't it odd how we tend to romanticise our past like it was some glorious, perfect, wonderful time? I was thinking about it the other day when I caught myself thinking about how perfect things were and how undoubtedly happy I was all the time...but then I remembered the way I used to cry at night, the way I doubted myself unless someone would compliment me, how lonely I used to feel, and how I grew up being fed delusions by my mother that I believed were true. Ironically, I think having hair loss has been one of the best things that could've happened to me because once my mother was no longer able to hold her mental strength up, I was forced to break out of the shell she crafted for me and learn how the world REALLY works for myself. And that world is turning out to be a lot different (as well as less superficial and less skrewed up) than my mother made me believe it was. It's given me a sense of my own two feet, my own voice, and my own mind. So for the first time, I'm actually admitting that losing my hair has been good for me. Woah!
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Comment by Jeff W on February 28, 2010 at 11:50pm
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Alexandra,
Nice comments! As hard as alopecia was to deal with, it certainly forced me to examine my life a little closer. At the very least it has caused me to adopt a healthier lifestyle and appreciate things I may have once taken for granted. I don't want to be accused of saying alopecia is a good thing - I wouldn't wish it on anyone. I have however observed that many of us here have derived some positives from it. Thanks for sharing!
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Comment by Mary on March 1, 2010 at 10:53am
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Thank you, Alexandra! This phrase is so true. I had my hair until age 54, and my eyebrows were my most distinctive feature. Now it's all gone. I began to feel better about the loss when I accepted that this is the new me. For a good perspective on dealing with changes we can't control, and on turning them into positives, read this interview with Michael J. Fox:
http://www.alopeciaworld.net/profiles/blogs/inspirational-words-from
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Comment by Lisa Santer on March 2, 2010 at 7:39am
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Thanks, Alexandra. I think it's true. Repeatedly--& not just about hair--letting go of who I was allowed me to welcome who I am now, or will be. "Lisa with beautiful hair" was a long time ago, almost a galaxy far far away. "Lisa with a beautiful clean head" was more recent, & I sometimes miss her. Right now, I'm stretching to welcome "Lisa who shaves patches & remembers she loves her life."
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Comment by Tiffany P on March 8, 2010 at 10:18pm
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I too have to learn have to let go of the past and move on to the future.
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