"I'm gonna miss this place"

This past weekend, I attended the NAAF Conference in Washington, DC. It was my first conference as an ‘adult.’ I have been to about 10 other conferences since 1994, but I was always in the kids’ camp. I loved every minute of that camp: I met a ton of people and was able to hang out with all of the friends I have made over the years. This year was different, though. I was able to go to meetings and talk about how having alopecia affects me. That was a rude awakening in itself. It was so nice to be reminded that “I’m not the only one.” Everyone has their own struggles that they are dealing with. It was amazing to listen to everyone’s stories and share some of my own. Many people had great advice to share, and I appreciated everyone’s input.

Although that was all fabulous, I heard the most impactful statement as I was getting ready to get in my car and go home. I was standing in front of the hotel with my luggage, waiting for the valet to bring my car around. I was caught up in trying to make sure I repacked everything and worrying about all of the traffic I was probably going to be sitting in for the next few hours. (If anyone is unfamiliar, the traffic on I-95 on a Sunday can be brutal!!!) Then an adorable little bald girl, probably about 4 or 5 years old, walked past me with her parents. I didn’t pay too much attention to them since I was so preoccupied. Right as they walked past me, I heard her say, “I’m gonna miss this place.” My heart sank. All of a sudden, I found myself standing in front of this hotel with my hands full crying uncontrollably. I still am not sure why. A part of me was thinking that she must have had an awesome weekend at the camp and didn’t want to go home, like many children who were at a camp with their friends. On the other hand, I was so upset. Although I’m sure she was not feeling like this, I thought that it is so sad that she is leaving a place where everyone else looked like her to go back home, where she is probably the only girl without hair. It broke my heart into a million pieces.

I can honestly say that I felt the exact same way. I’m going to miss that place, too! It’s amazing there! I can walk around without a wig (which I normally do anyway) and not have people stare at me because I am different. They know that I have alopecia and that’s it. I don’t have to deal with people assuming that I’m sick, and I don’t have to explain my situation to everyone I meet.
I guess the point of this story is that it’s so amazing how I tried to talk to people my own age all weekend to get some empathy, when all I had to do was listen to her five simple words. “I’m gonna miss this place.” It’s amazing how kids can sometimes say exactly what you’re feeling.

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Comment by Kimberly on July 24, 2012 at 1:10pm

touching post! I've been to 2 conferences and let me tell you even though I had alopecia for many years prior to going, it really helped me more than I could ever tell anyone. It helped me gain strength to be more open, it was so inspiring to see so many dealing/coping with the same thing as me...it is so worth going.

Comment by Tony on July 24, 2012 at 12:16pm

Great post. Very inspiring. Thank you for sharing it with us.

Comment by Kim Karacz on July 24, 2012 at 11:01am

Yes, next year is St. Louis, Missouri and in 2014 it will be in San Antonio, TX!

Comment by Alliegator on July 24, 2012 at 10:50am

This brought tears to my eyes! Great stories. It breaks my heart when things like that happen. I wanted to go to the conference when it was in Cali, but I was getting laid off from my job so I couldn't afford it. I'm going to make all the effort to go in 2013!

Comment by Tallgirl on July 24, 2012 at 10:10am

Everyone is mentioning St. Louis (Missouri), so I guess they announced it at the closing of this year's conference, as they always do.

Comment by Jane on July 24, 2012 at 9:09am
I loved this post..and hope that zi can attend one year. Does anyone know when and where the conference will be in 2013?
Comment by Alex on July 24, 2012 at 7:30am

Thanks for sharing, everyone! I hope all of you are able to make it to a conference one day! It's an experience that shouldn't be passed up!!

Comment by Latina Sethman-Benthall on July 24, 2012 at 7:06am
Wow I never been at a conference before let alone a support group,I was diagnosed with AU wen I was 14 becuz at 10 I was losing my in patches and at 12 everything was all gone and the doctors couldn't understand at all until I was 12 finally I was told what I had but I would love to go to one of conference one day.well I finally came out with my story in the daily press last week in my hometown hpt VA and it has help me a Alot by doing this to.
Comment by Corrine on July 24, 2012 at 1:40am
I would love to attend a conference one day . I lost my hair this past march. Wow it's a lot to take in. I have started going in public bald...everyone stares but I just feel that I need to do it. Besides wearing a wig all the time is so hot that I cannot wear them all the time. I have 3 great wigs but just not meant for summer
Comment by Kim Karacz on July 23, 2012 at 11:28pm

Beautiful post. I am always in awe at how kids can sum up something incredibly complicated so succinctly. The NAAF conference is such a special place. My first conference was in DC when I was 9 and there was just a small group of us "kids." Now, adults and kids alike, fill a hotel and become the majority for three glorious days. Just awesome...thanks for sharing.

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