Comment by Murray Halbert on May 7, 2018 at 9:14pm

I am going to comment on this as I do not think that important decisions should be made due to having hair or not. Having said that, I DO understand it is easier for a guy to say that than a gal, which has commercialism to blame.  Lost every hair in 1998, at the time it was a wtf is going on, Docs said I was healthy and they tried comical antidotes for a year then I put a stop to it. Then I just told any one that asked " I am good and not having hair isn't going to kill me".. My Heart goes out to people that have a hard time accepting the no hair scenario, especially children.

Children like to  heckle or mock some one with the slightest difference from the appeared norm. I like to think adults are more indifferent to out of the norm stuff. I do remember a situation in a bar that I was picked on I just told that person "I made a choice hair or brains and I see what you chose" . In all honesty 20/20 vision looking back, life with out hair, I would not change it!

Comment by GregOry on May 7, 2018 at 10:10pm

I got AU when I was 34. I was a lab technition. I quit everything and was hiding in my room. My I’m 38 and I wondering why I spent all that time with Netflix instead of living and being myself. I was afraid of how I looked and how people might react. Now I don’t give a shit I’d do like to learn how swim go to concerts and start dating again. When I was 33 I thought of myself as hot stuff that changed very fast. ...I do anything to have you as my swimming instructor... 

Greg

gregory731 at Gmail 

Comment by Brandwood Clinic on May 8, 2018 at 4:58am

It's so distressing to hear these stories, especially as I know how liberating Scalp Micropigmentation can be in these situations. Naturally, I would say that, but if you find the right practitioner, worrying about these kinds of issues can be a thing of the past. I know some women are not comfortable with the 'shaven-headed' look but it trumps AU all ways. 

Comment by Sandy on May 8, 2018 at 10:31am

I swim 3 days a week, and I love it so much I can't imagine giving it up. But I am also not swimming bald. I too have Alopecia Universalis, I'm 62 and lost all my hair about 11 years ago. I started going to the pool and just treading water with my wig on. Then I decided I wanted to swim laps, so I put on a bathing cap, and off I went. I am not one of those people who feel comfortable going around bald, and when I swim, I look like everybody else, and it works for me. Maybe someday I will feel comfortable not wearing the cap, but until then, I will put on my cap and take off. So you could wear a cap, would seem normal to everyone since you are in the pool. Best wishes

Comment by Lesley on May 8, 2018 at 6:57pm

Hi Melinda,

I have had similar feelings as you.  I never thought I would be able to be active, including swimming, water skiing, jet skiing, etc. until five years ago.   I am including a link with a picture of me on the water wearing a wig.   Jet%20Siing.PNG  I am able to enjoy all of life's activities with Alopecia, without worrying about my wig falling off or going without hair.  I am living life without worrying constantly about my hair.  My hair no longer controls what I do or don't do!.

I definitely understand exactly what you mean when you say..."it's tough living with hair and now without.." but it doesn't have to control you.  I use to swim competitively, teach swim lessons, was a swim coach, and lifeguard for years and then I lost all my hair.  It changed everything. I gave it all up because I couldn't take the constant worry and feeling that everyone was looking at me. I wish I had my Follea wig then, because now my hair no longer dictates what I can and cannot do.

Don't quite living, life is way too short.

Comment by Sorodmom on May 9, 2018 at 9:29pm

I understand how you feel but you have a gift and a passion don’t give it up because of fear what others will say,you are beautiful either way wig or no wig.I am 55 and  my hair started thinning at 16 it was hard,teens can be cruel and after high school adults too can be cruel ,I got anxiety and depression ,I spoke to therapist ,I missed a lot of family and friends events,then at 26  I had a husband that didnt care about my bald spots and we had kids so I had to be strong and get out for them,it wasn't easy but I wanted to be a hands on mom,I wore hats and sometimes wigs but still struggled to feel good about myself.I hope you go back to swimming and coaching because I wish I could have enjoyed more events with family and friends,those who matter love you with a wig or no wig.I learned that is all that matters.Enjoy your youth and live life to the fullest!

Comment by Nana on May 11, 2018 at 11:29am

I am sorry to hear that. 

The only thing I can hear when I read your post is: don't quit. As our one of the lady wrote in one of the above post: alopecia has taken so much out of our lives, don't let it take the job you like :)

Comment by Sue on May 16, 2018 at 5:00pm

Hi Friends,

the problem is that to my opinion alopecia  is NOT an illness. Illnesses can be cured or else they are lethal. But alopecia is none of htem. It is just a state of uglyness. I have almost AU, for 36 years I used to have AA, it went and came back. The situation has become worse, I hav too mucs stress, nov I have been having almost AU for 3 years. It is terrible. I canno support myself. After 3 years I began to swim in January this year again but it is rather difficult. It is difficult to change the warm cap against the swimming cap. I cannot work like bofore (my clients make remarks all the time, they notice that I wear a wig), so to say I cannot work. I cannot show myself at home, my husband ledt his  previous mate as she was bold for thyroid illness, I cannot look into the mirror without crying, the whole life is a disaster. I am waiting for the very end. That's it. There is no remedy, no hope, no future. I need 2-3 hours to go out of the flat. Even if I decide to go out I must go to the toilet for  nervous signs. Ican understand you very well but nobody understands me at home or in my surounding. I am totally alone.

All the best to you , Sue

Comment by gldean1988 on May 16, 2018 at 6:30pm

Alopecia is NOT a state of ugliness. 

Ugly is an opinion and not everyone agrees. There are beautiful women with alopecia, in my opinion.

You can find wigs that are pretty convincing. But, I don't feel committed to making people believe I have hair because that's too much work. I'm a teacher, and everyone knows I have AU. They can say whatever they want about me. If someone has something ugly to say, that's their problem, not yours or mine. I live a fufillinng life, and there is no reason why anyone with our condition shouldn't. 

Sue, not everyone feels the way you do. I hope you get help

Comment by gldean1988 on May 16, 2018 at 6:33pm

Btw, I wear wigs, hats, bandsnas, and occasionally go all natural. It's whatever I feel like. And when I get a new wig, I go to my students and everyone and am like, look at my cute hair. 

When you are comfortable with you, you give others permission to be comfortable with you as well

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