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Insensitive co-worker
Hi, everyone! I am 22 years old and a few weeks away from graduating with my bachelor's in nursing. I'm currently working on my practicum (basically, like an internship for nursing) at one of the hospitals in my area. Yesterday, one of the patient care technicians (this is a position below an RN, but still very important, of course) asked me a question. While I was answering her, she grabbed my badge and said "oh, this is when you had hair, and now you wear a wig." By the way, she said this in front of a small group of people who I also work with.
Honestly, I was so shocked and caught off guard. I have been wearing a wig for nearly 2 years now, and I have never had anything like this happen before. I don't have the most amazing wig in the world, but I do think I have a decent one (human hair, lace front). I just feel so disrespected and embarassed now. I would never call someone out on one of their flaws like that. In fact, I always go out of my way to make others feel good about themselves. I don't understand what the hell she was thinking. And, this woman is about twice my age, so she should really be more mature and know better.
In response to what she said, I just acted like I didn't even hear her at first and continued to answer her question. Then she repeated what she said, so I just said "no" and walked away. I am very private about my situation, and I feel no obligation to go around telling everyone. I have come out and told only a few special people who I trust. Obviously, others may have their suspicions, but that is okay. Most of them would just move on and never act on those suspicions.
After this happened, I first felt so sad and couldn't stop crying, and then I just became furious. Now, I'm kind of going back and forth between the two. Either way, I feel awful. I wonder "does everyone already know," "do they laugh at me/gossip about me." I've never felt like this before. I called out of work today to try to collect myself (to be honest, probably to avoid these people too), but I have not been very successful yet. I just wanted to vent to others who may be able to understand and offer some wise words. I'd appreciate any responses.
Hope all of you are having a lovely weekend!
Lauren
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Comment by Tallgirl on July 2, 2012 at 8:29am
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We all read those harrassment sheets before employment, so you have cause to go to personnel and ask them to talk to her and for personnel to remind all staff to prevent/speak up about coworker and patient humiliation and harrassment. You might express concern that she could do this to patients and make a bad name for the facility. Do NOT miss that college credit over Rude Her, of future paychecks once you are a nurse! (You WILL run into crazies or medicated rude folk on a job, you know. I have had students harrass me about wigs and threaten to pull them off as a teacher.)
Also speak to your university advisor. I am sure the college would want to make sure that no future interns get harrassed during placements. This event was NOT a good way to show mentoring to you on the part of that technician.
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Comment by Alliegator on July 2, 2012 at 10:41am
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Some people are so insensitive and ignorant. I'm sorry that happened to you. You will definitely run into rude people on the job. Just try to not let them bother you. Remind yourself that they are ignorant.
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Comment by You can do it : ) on July 2, 2012 at 7:27pm
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Ouch, wow some people don't know the difference between the right and wrong thing to say. It is not going to help to avoid them/situation. Try to think of all the people who love you.
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Comment by alamogirl/ aka Judy on July 5, 2012 at 9:40pm
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When I wore my first wig for the first time, a "friend" said, in front of several people, "You are wearing a wig. I can tell". I hadn't even told my family yet. I was so insecure and vulnerable anyway, I walked away, broke down and then came back with my head high but my heart low. So I hear you in your pain. People can be cruel; most are not. Later this person and I were talking about how some people made things difficult for me in the early weeks. She said, "I hope I'm not one of them". I told her that yes she was and she was one of the worst. She apologized. We are no longer good friends. You are not alone, Lauren. Dummies are everywhere. Take care and be strong.
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Comment by lynne on July 6, 2012 at 3:36pm
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What a heartless selfish bitch! excuse the harshness but i cant stand people like this. Who the hell gives them the right to do this. I would get a complaint in about her she deserves it. Ive had people make fun of me before to and it knocked my confidence big time i thats when i was in denial about my alopecia and didnt wnat anyone to know. People like her have serious issues themselves!! AArrrhggggg gets on my wick. lol. Hope ur ok tho and can hopefully get over this and i would not be speaking with her again. xx
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Comment by eugene shiling on July 28, 2012 at 4:06pm
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i know how you feel i have alopecia since im 6 im 31 now i had alot of moments like that espeshaly in school kids used to take my hat and run thru the hallway with it i learned theres always going to be jerks like that but it makes you stronger you might not feel it right oway but it dose make us stronger
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