Hope is a very powerful ingredient in one's life however so is a realistic point of view. I can hope that today will be a sunny day, I can hope that I'll find the greatest man on earth and I could certainly hope that my hair would come back BUT (and that's a big but) reality must come into play at some point here. Hope will not change the forcast for the day or bring me that great man and hope has nothing to do with making my hair come back. Hope is like daydreaming or wishing. Now I'm not bashing hope altogether here, it has a certain amount of good to it! Hope can bring a positive energy and lift one's spirits but what is really neccessary is a balance between hope and reality.

When it comes to alopecia I feel that it is the doctors who are mainly to blame for offering this false hope in the first place. He/She has absolutely no idea if your hair will grow back, fall out or take you for the ride of your life. Hang on tight baby, you may be in for quite a ride if hope is your primary thought. This is when knowing when to walk away becomes important. After 32 years I still have an inkling of hope however reality has taken over. I've done my research and I know that with AT and AU the likelyhood of me ever getting a full head of hair back is extremely slim. Rarely it does occur but after so many years of being without it, this will likely be the story of my life.

For those with AA the chances of recovery are much greater regardless of whether it is from treatment or coincidence (I have my own views of treatments which I won't get into today) and having hope is much more realistic than for those with other forms of alopecia. Peace of mind, either way, will only come from letting that hope dissipate and allowing reality to take place. This is not a negative thing, think of it more as accepting the cards which have been dealt to you. It's like a poker game, if you've been dealt bad cards you can chose to make faces allowing others to up the ante cause they know you're going to lose or you can accept what you've been dealt and play the game. This is all about acceptance and optimism!

Optimism and hope couldn't be more different. Hope is blind faith whereas optimism is choosing to look at the bright side of things regardless of the situation. Is my cup half empty or half full? If one is too hopeful their cups are often overflowing and there is no room to take in reality, they must take a few sips to empty the cup to make room for more. Overflowing cups are messy and this is why one must take a great big sip from time to time and let it sink in. When worse comes to worse the cup is emptied completely only to eventually be filled again. This is the important part - "to be filled again" - because a shocking situation often makes us empty our cups, we are trying to let this reality sink in and then we may feel empty. We all have our own timelines when it comes to coping but eventually the drink levels out. When a balance of hope and reality are maintained by acceptance and optimism, the cup remains at half, neither overflowing or emptying. I can't tell you how to walk away from hope or emptiness because it is different for everyone but you have to observe your actions and thoughts to learn when to walk away to avoid spilling or emptying.

Regardless of whether your cup is empty or full, both can be harmful to your well being. Either way you are avoiding acceptance! Through acceptance it doesn't matter if your hair grows back or falls out even more. At this point you can love yourself for who you are. It is said that one must love themselves before they are capable of loving anyone or anything else and I truly believe this. You can love yourself entirely without being vain if you realize that the love you have for yourself is to be shared with everyone around you. It's like the difference between a false smile and a real smile, everyone around you can tell the difference. Basically what I'm getting at is let go of the negativity in being empty or full, let only positivity rule you. Allow room in your cup to empty or be filled but never to completely empty or overflow.