I am now about 10+ months into my life with AA. I've gone through the spectrum of emotions since finding my first "spot," but really feel like I've come to a point where I don't cry, panic, freak out with every new change. Although the landscape of my head is ever-changing, I'm finding it a little bit easier to accept. Not to say I don't have bad days-- and a few mini freak out days now and then-- but they are just no longer "horrible" days as they were in the beginning. I've learned a lot through this process and thought you might enjoy some of the things that I think I have learned from this experience. Here are my Top Ten Lists to-date:

The Top 10 Things I HATE about AA:

1. Finding my hair everywhere but on my head.
2. Only being able to wear my hair in one strategically engineered hairstyle.
3. WIND!
4. The fact that AA decided to choose my head and not my legs and underarms where I DON'T want hair.
5. Not being able to pluck the gray hairs, because they are hairs and I need them all.
6. Finding more of my hair in the vacuum cleaner than the hair from my two shedding dogs.
7. People saying "I have a friend that had Alopeica and it all came back fine."
8. Not getting to "treat" myself to a day at the hair salon, because it's no longer fun and relaxing.
9. The lumps and divets in my head from all the shots.
10. Not being able to have any control over this thing!!!!

The top 10 things I "love" about AA:

1. Realizing my hair isn't really as important as I thought it was...most of the time.
2. Not having to spend as much time styling my hair.
3. Baseball hats.
4. My husband no longer complains when he finds my hair all over the bathroom.
5. Realizing that I am blessed to have a husband that always says that I would look totally sexy completely bald.
6. Deciding to be open with everyone I know about this condition and educating them on it.
7. Having people really understand when I say I'm having a bad hair day.
8. Realizing I can't be in control of everything.
9. Realizing that there are people going through things that are 1000 times worse than losing hair.
10. Finding websites like this that have so many strong and inspiring people with which to be able to share this unique journey.

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Comment by Kelly on September 22, 2009 at 4:34am
Susan S, I totally know how you are feeling! This has been the hardest thing I have ever been through! My hair has always been one of the physical features that I most liked about myself and was the one thing that I was most complimented on. I may not have a perfect size 6 figure but I always had great hair, so suddenly losing it was -- to say the least -- traumatic. I freaked out, obsessesed, panicked and cried ALOT! A therapist has really helped me. I would highly recommend it. There's nothing wrong with asking for help. I also found that being open with everyone about my condition and what I was going through really took away the stigma and shame that I had originally felt. In fact, my coworkers, family and friends seemed fascinated in learning about AA and by talking openly about it it really seemed to strengthen my acceptance of what was happening to me as well as their appreciation and understanding of what I was going through. All my friends know that some day down the road I may end up losing it all and show up in a wig or ---dare I -- no wig at all and I think seeing how I am handling this journey makes all the difference in the world in how they see me. Do I really "LOVE" AA? NO ABSOLUTELY NOT. I despise it with every ounce of my being and I wish I could go back to a year ago when I had a full beautiful head of hair, but I can't, so I'm learning to deal with it. That's not to say that I don't have my own private pity party quite often, but I do promise you that things will get better by talking about it and not being afraid to ask for professional help if you need it.
Comment by Georgie on September 22, 2009 at 12:00am
I totally agree with both lists. I still find it ironic that I have to pluck my brows. I also hate it when one of my hairs fall into the back of my shirt or even my bra. It drives me nuts!!!!!!!!! The vacuum cleaner....don't even get me started. *sigh*
Comment by Susan S on September 21, 2009 at 10:26pm
How long did it take for you to get to this point, where you have an I love
AA list? This is still new to me, and I don't know how you all do it.
Susan

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