Alopecia World
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Thoughts of selfishness
June 2, 2009
Just after I went to the Dr to basically confirm what I already knew, I started to really look around the intar-web on Alopecia. Started to feel that Woe is me wash over me. The more I read about AA/AU/AB/AT, the more I thought that maybe I should be at odds with who or what gave me this! I was really pumped up and mad.
I thought I had it bad when my facial hair went. I could feel the burning/tingling at each attack site. Watching the hair pattern simply... go away. I've had a moustache for over 20+ years! Why?! How did I get this Auto-immune thing ?
I asked my father if anyone in the family (both sides that he knew of) had Alopecia. I searched through my family tree and couldn't see anything other than normal male pattern baldness in a few relatives.
That's when I read that the Diabetes my mother had (yes, she died from it) was also a form of Auto-immune. Suddenly my previous rage crashed. The mother I watched all my life giving herself shots of insulin and having I don't remember how many insulin reactions. The mother I grew up with had diabetes. All I knew back then was that she couldn't eat sweet things (unless she was having a reaction) and had to watch her diet. Little did I know that her form of AI hated her ability to process sugars.
So reading up on Alopecia Areata, I found it was an Auto-immune "disorder" (I don't like the idea or sound of it being called a disease. A disease is life threatening [IMO]). This disorder happens to hate hair (not life-threatening).
So with this information fresh in my head and my resignation with my fate (giving up? hardly! It WILL grow back!), I went to my boss and let them know that I would be cutting off my hair in the very near future. I got the expected questions of how/why/what about Alopecia.
I was letting a few co-workers know about my "condition" and the upcoming change in my appearance. Basically I was sitting on a pity-pot and wanting plenty.
That's when I was approached by a female co-worker that let me know she has another form of Auto-immune (Which kind is private). She needs to take meds for the rest of her life.
That little tidbit she gave me knocked me out of my self absorbed pity. Here I have AA and the worst I have to do is shave my head or put on a wig or hat. Wow... I have it soooooo hard. My mother had to give herself DAILY shots of insulin. My co-worker has to take meds as well as continue to get checked on to see if things get better or worse.
So that was last Thursday... Today, I bought myself a new razor, grabbed my camera and went straight to the barber. I was asked if I was sure. I was positive. I started to explain the goings on and the guy cutting my hair (a 24 yr old) said he had a small bout with Alopecia but it grew back. He said (along with another barber in the shop) that it is mostly stress related and I should not worry and not be so stressed.
So let me review the stress I have recently gone through that may have "urged on" my AA.
Moved back to WA in 2007 (kinda un-expected *_* )
Started working (graveyard shifts FTL >_< )
Lost 50 lbs. (FTW! ^_^ )
Got braces. (another WIN! wanted them long ago but too much $$$)
Got dental implants (2) (had some help with these, so added stress ~_~ )
Change in work position (move from night to day shifts)
I'm sure there may be more, but that is the highlights of the past 2 yrs.
While I'm sure stress is a factor in Alopecia, it's not the only trigger. What major stresses does someone have when they are under 10? Growing up, I don't recall seeing anyone with Alopecia, but then again, 30+ years ago, I didn't know much less care what Aolpecia is. (Sorry if I sound a bit cold, but when you're a kid, you don't think too long on things that aren't happening specifically to yourself.)
So while I have it hard, I KNOW there are others out there that have far worse things going on with their bodies than hair not wanting to grow. That fact alone helps keep thoughts of selfishness at bay, thankfully.
I can only wonder what others are going though, but for me, I think I got off rather lucky if this is all I have going on in my life.
-Jay
WyldCard
Just after I went to the Dr to basically confirm what I already knew, I started to really look around the intar-web on Alopecia. Started to feel that Woe is me wash over me. The more I read about AA/AU/AB/AT, the more I thought that maybe I should be at odds with who or what gave me this! I was really pumped up and mad.
I thought I had it bad when my facial hair went. I could feel the burning/tingling at each attack site. Watching the hair pattern simply... go away. I've had a moustache for over 20+ years! Why?! How did I get this Auto-immune thing ?
I asked my father if anyone in the family (both sides that he knew of) had Alopecia. I searched through my family tree and couldn't see anything other than normal male pattern baldness in a few relatives.
That's when I read that the Diabetes my mother had (yes, she died from it) was also a form of Auto-immune. Suddenly my previous rage crashed. The mother I watched all my life giving herself shots of insulin and having I don't remember how many insulin reactions. The mother I grew up with had diabetes. All I knew back then was that she couldn't eat sweet things (unless she was having a reaction) and had to watch her diet. Little did I know that her form of AI hated her ability to process sugars.
So reading up on Alopecia Areata, I found it was an Auto-immune "disorder" (I don't like the idea or sound of it being called a disease. A disease is life threatening [IMO]). This disorder happens to hate hair (not life-threatening).
So with this information fresh in my head and my resignation with my fate (giving up? hardly! It WILL grow back!), I went to my boss and let them know that I would be cutting off my hair in the very near future. I got the expected questions of how/why/what about Alopecia.
I was letting a few co-workers know about my "condition" and the upcoming change in my appearance. Basically I was sitting on a pity-pot and wanting plenty.
That's when I was approached by a female co-worker that let me know she has another form of Auto-immune (Which kind is private). She needs to take meds for the rest of her life.
That little tidbit she gave me knocked me out of my self absorbed pity. Here I have AA and the worst I have to do is shave my head or put on a wig or hat. Wow... I have it soooooo hard. My mother had to give herself DAILY shots of insulin. My co-worker has to take meds as well as continue to get checked on to see if things get better or worse.
So that was last Thursday... Today, I bought myself a new razor, grabbed my camera and went straight to the barber. I was asked if I was sure. I was positive. I started to explain the goings on and the guy cutting my hair (a 24 yr old) said he had a small bout with Alopecia but it grew back. He said (along with another barber in the shop) that it is mostly stress related and I should not worry and not be so stressed.
So let me review the stress I have recently gone through that may have "urged on" my AA.
Moved back to WA in 2007 (kinda un-expected *_* )
Started working (graveyard shifts FTL >_< )
Lost 50 lbs. (FTW! ^_^ )
Got braces. (another WIN! wanted them long ago but too much $$$)
Got dental implants (2) (had some help with these, so added stress ~_~ )
Change in work position (move from night to day shifts)
I'm sure there may be more, but that is the highlights of the past 2 yrs.
While I'm sure stress is a factor in Alopecia, it's not the only trigger. What major stresses does someone have when they are under 10? Growing up, I don't recall seeing anyone with Alopecia, but then again, 30+ years ago, I didn't know much less care what Aolpecia is. (Sorry if I sound a bit cold, but when you're a kid, you don't think too long on things that aren't happening specifically to yourself.)
So while I have it hard, I KNOW there are others out there that have far worse things going on with their bodies than hair not wanting to grow. That fact alone helps keep thoughts of selfishness at bay, thankfully.
I can only wonder what others are going though, but for me, I think I got off rather lucky if this is all I have going on in my life.
-Jay
WyldCard
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Comment by JeffreySF on June 2, 2009 at 11:32pm
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Hi Jay,
You have put things into great perspective.
I have worked in healthcare for the past 25 years and see death and dying on a daily basis. What we suffer from is not life threatning but more of an emotional threat to the ego.
Keep your health as long as you can and keep your mental health in check too.
May you live a long and healthy life
Jeffrey
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Comment by Tracy and Amanda on June 3, 2009 at 3:05am
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Hello,
I was reading your blog and it really hit home for me. My daughter who is 6 has alopecia areata. I have been having a hard time dealing with it. The moment I found out I stayed up late on the internet for hours researching alopecia. It said in some cases it was hereditary but just like you there was no one on my family or my husbands families side that had it. One article said it was stress and I thought how could a 4 yr old at that time have stress. I kept telling myself "Why Her Why Her" it got me so angry. Especially after reading some members stories on how their alopecia was just a few spots in childhood but then got worse when they reached their teens or young adulthood. I cant help thinking what the future has in store for her. But then like you I came to accept it and am thankful it does not cause her pain or is life threatening. It makes me thank god for how lucky we really are. Hope to chat with you more soon.
Tracy
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Comment by Joshua on June 3, 2009 at 1:13pm
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Hi,
I enjoyed reading your article, not only it is resourceful it is also honest, well said in the beginning and a motivating and powerful ending.
Worrying about hairloss and alopecia cannot be considered selfish as long as it does not done in the expense of others and also more important priorities in life. A highly delicate issue to dissect but I shall not go further.
Personally, I am trying to improve my self-confidence/ esteem always and whenever I lost it or feeling lack of confidence, my self-pitiness will head straight into my mind to make me feel emotionally better. Self pitines is rather unhealthy or even to the point of dangerous just like self righteousness/ holier than thou syndrome. Having self-respect on the other is a healthy thing to live our lives.
One of the major issues dealing with alopecia would be the issues/ comments revolving around our peers, family and friends, and the society in general. Therefore, alopecia support and awareness are crucial fundamentals that every alopecia patient should have.
Stress, could be one of the few theories of triggering alopecia. Although it is not scientifically directly proven, but studies (retrospective studies) have shown alopecia is triggered by some form of stress in many alopecia areata patients.
Thank you for your inspiring post. I must be thankful everyday and every moment of the day. Thank you for sharing.
God bless
jt
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