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Permalink Reply by Mary on September 20, 2008 at 4:45pm

I had another first last night - I went wig and scarf-free to an art reception here in San Diego. It was outdoors and indoors, and I carried one of my Turkish scarves in my purse in case I was chilly. I wore big earrings and a somewhat dramatic v-neck black knit top and skirt. Yes, I felt a bit self-conscious as we arrived and were introduced to a bunch of people, but I quickly just forgot about it. My baldness was a conversation-starter in a couple of instances. For the FIRST TIME going bald to something like this (as opposed to the grocery store or gym), I felt beautiful! Just try it.

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Permalink Reply by Mary on September 22, 2008 at 1:15am

Thanks, Angela. Sometimes I feel very alone as an "out" bald woman. I would love to meet another woman going natural and free in public, but it hasn't happened yet. Sigh....

It's funny, but I've almost gotten to the point that I feel strange (in addition to hot and itchy) when I put on my wig. I only wear it once a week, at most, and sometimes less than that.

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Permalink Reply by Mary on September 22, 2008 at 1:22am

Thanks!

I always carry a scarf or head wrap in my purse so I'll have it in case I get cold in a store. I wear a sun hat if I'm going to be out much (protecting face and tattooed eyebrows). How long have you been going bald?

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Permalink Reply by milliemolliemandi on October 4, 2008 at 9:59am

i have been wigless from the start of my alopecia. normally i am fine. but just lately. 10 years into it. am soooo pissed off with being bald. dont want to wear a wig. happy to wear hats. but even going off the scarves now. bit depressed about the whole thing. hoping to work through it. normally i am upbeat woman who would encourage all to be wigless and proud but last few weeks... not happy... i just wish i had hair again. feeling a bit down.

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Permalink Reply by Mary on October 4, 2008 at 4:26pm

Hang in there. I agree with Bogie's wonderful reply. I go up and down, but really try to focus on all the ways that my health is good, and my life is good. This baldness sucks so bad - it's okay to be angry or down about it at times.

I have to share something that happened last night at the movies. Although I go bald most of the time, I was wearing a knit turban because it was a bit cool in the theater. Just before the movie started, a couple sat down to my right. The man was next to me, and I noticed right away that he was obviously sick - coughing, snuffling - clearly a bad cold. I'm about to go on a trip, and really don't want to get sick! There were no other seats for us to move to.

I took off my cap, turned to him and said very nicely "Excuse me sir, do you have a cold?" He nodded, then looked at my bald head as I said "I have immune system issues...would you mind moving down?" He immediately got up and moved to the other side of his wife, at the end of the row. I heard him coughing the whole movie, and I feel pretty sure I would have been exposed to a nasty bug if I hadn't done this.

I didn't lie...I DO have immune system issues (overactive T cells, not suppressed). People mistake us bald gals for cancer patients all the time, and I would never lie and say I have cancer. BUT, in this instance, all it took was for him to see my head, assume I am on chemotherapy and quickly assent to my request that he move. I think I may add this to my "Top 10 Benefits of AU".

What do you all think - did I do anything wrong? ( ;-)

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Permalink Reply by Starr on October 5, 2008 at 6:46am

I too would love to go 'wig free', maybe not all the time, but would like to have the confidence to choose, depending on where I am going and what I am doing.

I went on holiday to Disneyworld Florida, and went 'wig free' for the two weeks... I loved it.

The most difficult thing for me would be explaining to people who don't know about my alopecia and see me on a daily basis wearing a wig. I think I would find it difficult to keep on explaining, I suppose almost apologising for my lack of hair.

It is easy to go into a totally new situation without my wig, because people won't have known me any other way.

Let me know how you get on if you decide to go ahead and try going 'wig free' .

Starr xx

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Permalink Reply by Reen on October 8, 2008 at 3:02pm

First of all, MAJOR congratulations!!!!!!!

I still hate going "topless" to get my mail at the end of the driveway on a very residential street!

I'm hoping that at some point, I can go sans wig at work (I work at Starbucks) but for now, the wig makes life easiest... I'm not there yet!

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Permalink Reply by Mary on March 8, 2009 at 2:09pm

Hi Maidie,
Just returned from my first bald scuba trip...check out my post and photos on my page.

NO WAY I would have taken a wig along! I was bald the whole trip, except when I needed sun protection or warmth: on the planes, at the dive resort, hotels, restaurants, dive boats. I was in and out of the water all day while diving, and I sometimes thought how in the hell a woman who refuses to be seen bald would have managed!

Everyone got used to my look very quickly. No problems. I still get down sometimes about being bald, but every day it's easier.

Hope you're doing great!
Mary

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Permalink Reply by Erin on March 8, 2009 at 7:22pm

I have been thinking of this more and more and how I would like to start going without sometimes... not sure if or when it will happen though.. but good for you!! it is freeing eh? i did it once, it was great, but have not sice, it was a different situation then. it is kinda hard because I am in the beaty industry and feel like I must be "traditional stulish and all that)... anyway ha, good job!

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Permalink Reply by Mary on March 8, 2009 at 10:09pm

Yes, the work situation you're in has a big impact on the decision. I used to be an attorney, and I KNOW that if I'd lost my hair when I was still doing that, I would have worn a wig in court, and when meeting with clients (at least until they got to know me.) Maybe the beauty industry would actually be open to an elegant, exotic bald look. I've seen some amazing photos online and in print ads of bald women models.

Good luck, and thanks.

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Permalink Reply by Orbit on March 11, 2009 at 7:46am

Congratulations on your personal milestone! Your post is very inspiring and means a lot to those of us who haven't ventured far from home AU Naturelle - YET!

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Permalink Reply by Dielle on March 15, 2009 at 2:36pm

I haven't personally decided to go wig free in public though I am considering it. Anyways I have a suggestion to all of you ladies brave enough to go bald in the workplace! If you boss/supervisor asks you to wear a wig to work 1) assert your rights under the Americans with Disabilities Act 2)tell your boss that you would be happy to wear a wig if he or the company would pay for it! (then tell him the GOOD wigs run upwards of 3000 dollars hehehehe). Why should you have to pay for something when you don't want it and don't feel you need it? They can't make you pay for something that they think is necessary. Plus there are so many old bald guys walking around offices that you should request they should also have to "cover up".

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