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At what point do you REALLY start to accept it?
I discovered my first spot just under a month ago. It grew large, fast. I shaved the underneath of my hair. The a week later I discovered a few smaller ones closer to the top of my head.
Last night, I thought maybe I might be imagining it, but could have sworn there was a small spot missing from my eyebrow.
Which I've just realised has doubled in size.
Yay!. Not!
Sh*t just got real then!
Has it been this quick for anyone else?
Aly
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Lyn on
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After my marriage ended 6 yrs ago, and the hair problem began, I resigned myself to the fact I would never have enough confidence to even think of dating. Its been one of the hardest things to deal with in my life! Living near the beach but always having to make sure hat or scarf is on,,, Wigs are so hot to wear in the summer too. I can't even imagine going out without something on my head. I remember the way people would look and stare when I was out when this all began and I remember thinking to myself don't think this can't happen to you. You can have a whole head of beautiful hair one year and it can be gone the next year. I think if I had always had this problem it would have been easier dealing with than to all of a sudden have it happen to you. My heart goes out to anyone dealing with this issue, I know how you feel and its not a good feeling to have.
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Permalink Reply by Dorothy on
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For me the AU was complete in two weeks and never regrew in the almost 42 years now. Back then and in my area there were no doctors who knew anything about AU and never even used the term AU or autoimmune, so it was a long hard process to get to where I am now. The hardest part was accepting there is no cure and I will be like this most likely the rest of my days. I don't know if quick and done was hardest or if slowly loosing patches and the patches growing as time went by would have been harder.
NO matter, it is life altering and no matter your age or how quick the progression it is something we each handle in different ways. Like grief, there is no right way.
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Permalink Reply by Debby on
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Aly I too had the experience of going to bed one night and getting up the next day to find that most of my hair was missing. It amazes me how quickly it goes. I have some spots of hair left at this time. I do not want to shave due to having the patches left over. I am in the between stages I guess is what it would be called. When I shower and wash what little hair I have I notice a lot of it sitting in the stopper of the shower. I wear wigs but really don't care for them. I lost one of my eye brows about 2 years ago so I just pencil them in everyday. It is annoying as all get out but what can you do. I wear scarfs around the house mostly on the weekends only because I feel that I am too ugly to go without. My husband has been a Godsend. He states that he loves me for who I am and not just for my looks. You will have down days just like many of us with this condition, but just remember that you do not have to go it alone. Keep in touch!
Debby
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Permalink Reply by AlopeciaDestroyedMyLife on
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I've had it for over 10 years and not one day has gone by that I have accepted it or will I ever accept it.
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I lost all my hair in three weeks including eyelashes and eyebrows. I shaved my entire head the fourth week since I only had long strays anyway and I looked like I just walked away from a nuclear attack. The process of losing hair was so much worst than when it was all gone.
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Permalink Reply by ossy201 on
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Fay,
I completely agree watching it fall out drove me crazy, so I buzzed it all that way when I showered all my long hair wasn't sticking to me and making me more depressed. It all fell out eventually but being bald is so much easier than going bald was. Now I wear hats when it's cold, wigs when I'm getting glam med up or just let my little bald head breathe. I gave to draw on eyebrows though it's the one thing I just have to do to feel like me.
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Permalink Reply by JimB on
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OK ..... This is going to sound crazy ..... But, since you have already shaved a little then your next step is TO THROW A COMING OUT PARTY ..... Invite family and friends ..... Tell them ..... Then, sit in a chair, in the middle of the room, with scissors and clippers sitting on a small table next to you ..... INVITE each one to step up and snip off a section of your hair ..... Then, play a game to see who will be first to use the clippers ..... Then, YOU just go into the bathroom and shave your head for the last time ..... The WORLD is yours to take whole of and do not let ALOPECIA hold you back from being your self ..........
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I think it was even harder to accept when my hair grew back. In 2005 i had a full head of hair. Then it fell out, then grew back, then fell out again. Lather rinse and repeat. Here it is - the year 2015.. and i STILL can't keep a full head of healthy hair.
My specific areas are the vertex, the nape, plus the right and left temple, that would fall out in one area each year - sometimes every 6 months depending on my stress level or type of supplement. When the left side would grow in, the right side would fall out. When the right side would grow in, the crown would fall out. Finally when the crown would grow in - i'd find palm-sized bald spots in the back - then boom! the right side would fall out again.
i've accepted the fact - finally - that i have alopecia after 10 years of denial. My SO sometimes accepts it, but when there's a commercial/informercial that he sees about some "miracle" hair growth product - he comes running.
The only thing that stops him from buying it, is when i tell him: "Honey, it doesn't work for alopecia".. he looks kind of daunted.. then finally agrees and finds something else to watch on the t.v.
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Your SO is like all SOs ..... They want to see their SO feel better and when ever something comes around they will wish it will work and make you feel better ..... Do not just tell him, "Honey, it doesn't work for Alopecia ....." ..... GIve him a big hug and kiss and do not let him go ..... He is hurting as much as you are but has not come to terms .....
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Permalink Reply by SandY on
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Having AU for now 2 years on and being a guy at first I found it difficult to accept since my eyebrows n eyelashes were gone..I know how difficult it wud be for a female to go through this..You need to have a supportive partner and family to go through this and slowly you'll see things falling in place.. once you do that, you'll start to feel better and stronger! I have made myself believe that this look actually makes me look betta..!! Be strong n good Luck! :)
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Permalink Reply by Debwp on
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Hi Aly
I have never accepted it and have had AA for over 40 years now, I know how to deal with mine. It only ever comes out when I have periods of stress, I believe it is my immune system attacking itself due to this stress.
I had a very stressful time 2 years ago and it erupted on the back of my head, just like yours, once again I went to the specialist and had injections, and once again the hair grew back. I found a couple more a few months later, had more injections, and it re-grew.
My understanding of AA is that stress brings it out, so it is important to control stress, when possible. AA no longer fills me with fear as I know what to do, cut out or avoid the stress in how I react to others. The other day I came across a section of hair half the length of my other hair, so I knew it was a spot that had re-grown back on its own.
If stress is a part of your life, it is important to control or eliminate it, with either meditation or thought distraction methods. Stress will eat away hair as a warning to sufferers to stop it, in other people it causes cancer or other terminal conditions, I am very thankful it is a temporary warning signal to me to cut down on the stress.
I hope this gives you confidence that it can be beaten and possibly a good warning system to cut down the stress, whether or not you are aware of it but this is the case with my AA.
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I think that it got real for me when i bought my vacuum wig and the rep had to shave off my few pieces of remaining hair. i kept thinking that my hair would grow back, but it never really did. At this point, I'm happy. I love my wig and really don't want my real hair to grow back, but i would love to have my eyelashes back. Hope this year is a happy new year for you!
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