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Can't handle this
Hi, my name is Sonia and Iv just been diagnosed with Alopecia Areata. Back in July I found a small round patch in the back of my head. Went to my doc and he said its from stress. But in a matter of a month the patch grew much bigger and my hair is now so fine. I went to a dermatologist and he said its gonna get worse. So he gave me Regaine 5% to apply twice a day. I did that but it did not help and the patch got bigger and bigger. I know lost about 40% of my hair. So I went back to derm and he gave me a steroid pill called Solupred which I have to take once a day for a month and then I go see him again.
Im depressed, dont know if Im gonna go bald or if my hair will grow back. I cry every single day, sometimes even most of the day. Im beginning to think about quitting my job, which is in the fitness industry.
Please can anybody help me cos I cant accept this and dont know how to cope. I just want my hir back
Im depressed, dont know if Im gonna go bald or if my hair will grow back. I cry every single day, sometimes even most of the day. Im beginning to think about quitting my job, which is in the fitness industry.
Please can anybody help me cos I cant accept this and dont know how to cope. I just want my hir back
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by nojash on
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Sonia, you have so much good stuff going on in your life, eventually you will realize that your hair is not a big part of it. It really isn't a big deal to others if you don't bring attention to it. Try wearing a wig that is close to your natural hair color and style and you will see people will compliment you on your hair and won't even notice it is a wig. I got most my compliments from men believe it or not. They just see the overall picture, if you know what I mean. My husband loves when I wear my wigs and tells me how great I look, in fact, he encourages me to wear them. It has happened to me all the time. I never had so many compliments on my hair when I had all my hair. You have a family that loves and needs you and needs your strength not only to help you through this but to help them through this. Focus away from yourself and focus on others and important things that really matter. We never know with this disease what will happen and yes it can drive you crazy. I have been dealing with this for over a year and have lost 50% of my hair, bald spots have grown in but more is falling out. I don't know if I will go bald or I will wind up with half the hair (which is better than none) I guess. It bothers me every day and I dread looking a myself. This isn't who I was or am, but I can't keep driving myself crazy and others. There is a life to be lived out there and anyone who knows you is not going to like you any less, you are not less of a person, in fact, you are more of a person because you will become stronger and even eventually look to comfort others with this disease, and you will appreciate things a lot more.
The drugs you are trying are not guaranteed to work and the doctors tell you that. They don't have the answers because your body is going to do what it wants and everyone is different. Nobody knows. I did not opt for any drugs and the bald spots have filled in (even though I'm still losing). I didn't want to give myself more stress with hoping that the drugs would work and then be disappointed when they didn't and not to mention the side effects these drugs have. I would have been a real basket case. Maybe God is testing you. Count your blessings and show him how strong you are. (-:
(Believe me I am hurting as I write this. Sometimes it is easier said than done. Hang in there. PLEASE don't quit your job or your life. You have so much value.
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Oh God those were the best words I heard so far. Im crying while im reading your message but at the same time u give me courage. I want to deal with it, and sometimes I have really good days, but the bad days are winning so far. I wish i had strength that u have..... maybe i will get it in time. This is all new to me and its hard to understand still. But I promise I will try to be stronger and look at a positive side.
Its so nice to have all these people here to share my story with. At least I dont feel alone. Thanks for helping me out and I really wish you all the best with your life. Im happy that your patches are growing hair.
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Permalink Reply by Sandi Walmsley on
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Dear Sonia, I know from personal experience how hard it is to lose your hair. I have had all forms of alopecia - everything from areata to universalis. I found my first spot when I was 24 and continued to grow back/lose/grow back/lose, etc... over the next few years. There are great wigs out there if you find you need one. When I was 29 I had complete hair loss (universalis) after having my 1st child. When I got pregnant with my second child I began to grow my hair back and I've been lucky enough that it has all come back and stayed (my 2nd is almost 8 years old). The dermatologist told me that once you've had total loss that it's not likely that it will ever come back...I hope that I can be an example for others with alopecia...it can grow back. I never did any treatments, but that was my choice, the dermatologist wanted me to, but I said I wasn't interested.
I guess what I'm saying is that alopecia became part of who I am and it made me a much stronger person. Keep your head up, hold it up high! Bald is beautiful.
Please don't quit your job or anything. If people can't accept you for who you are, that's their problem.
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Wow Sandi, what an inspiration you have been. One minute im crying and now after reading your comment, u put a smile on my face. Thank you so much. I really needed to hear that.
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So nice of you to say that. Thanks. Im just gonna have to take it day by day and learn how to deal with it. Im glad i have this site now. Its a blessing. Thanks
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Permalink Reply by Mary on
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Sonia, hang on and try to believe that your life will go on even IF you go bald. Rather than repeat myself, take a look at my page with photos, blogs and videos. Maybe something there will help.
You say you can't accept this...I didn't think I could, but I have. I want my hair back, too, but I refuse to let this stupid disease ruin my life.
Check out all the inspiring stories, photos and videos here on AW. You're not alone!
Mary
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Permalink Reply by margaret staib on
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Mary, I LOVE the way you write, that was beautiful. :) Sonia, it's all good, it's a grieving process and you will get over this and then start living. Life is a wonderful thing, you have to be in it to enjoy it! :)
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Permalink Reply by Bald and Fabulous AKA Terri on
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Sonia your story is so close to mine that I felt the emotion well up inside me just reading your words. Im sure you feel that there is no light at the end of the tunnel BUT please remember that there is indeed a light at the end of the tunnel. A big beautiful shinning light just for you. I have dealt with the hair loss and regrowth on so many occasions that I thought I couldnt handle it any longer. But with supportive family and friends and having this place to vent about your feelings and having the unconditional support here, you will realize that you are so much more than your hair. Hair does NOT define the person you are. Its an accessory, and the best part about that is you can change your "do" at anytime to anything. Hang in there and believe in your strength.
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Thank you so much Terri. Its so nice to be able to talk to other people about this. this is the first time this has happened to me so I really dont know how to go about it. I read here so many stories, but I never knew that if hair grows it might fall off again. That is terrible, just to give u hope and then take it all away again.
I admire people like you, that have the courage to carry on with their lives. I feel mine is at a stand still right now. Just dont feel like doing anything..... Just wanna stay in the house and cant be bothered. Dont even want to see any people and the worst thing for me is when family and friends call me on the phone to see how im doing.... I just break down in tears and wont be able to talk. Im really hoping this gets better because Im thinking im gonna get into a depression now and thats the last thing i need. So everyday I come here and read other stories that give me a bit of courage.
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Permalink Reply by soniamarry on
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Sonia, i know exactly how you are feeling right now. Reading your blog it seems as though i could have written it myself. My hair is very fine like yours so i went out and bought a wig. A friend on here suggested i go to a town where no one knew me to test out my new do! I did so and it worked like a charm. I now use my wig all the time except to bed. No one is the wiser about it and i get tons of compliments! I know that having alopecia is very hard and i too would love to have my own hair. I do not give up hope that one day it will grow, but for now i am making the best of it in my new do! Once you start researching you will find that there are many options out there for you. I hope that you find comfort soon!
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Hey Mary, thanks for your comments. People like you really inspire me. this is all new to me and Im just beginning to try and understand what its all about. I mean I am 50 years old and have been a healthy person all my life. Im very active, cos I am an aerobic instructor (which makes it worse for me to go to work now) and have been lively and outspoken all my life. All of a sudden this thing happens and I just feel like I dont want to carry on anymore. I hate it and I wonder why is this happening to me. But its there now and there is nothing I can do about it, but accept it and TRY to move on. Oh how I wish I can move on!!!!!! and go back to normal again. I guess the thing that hurt me most was that I went to one dermatologist first and he said its all gonna be ok and i can see new hairs already. Then I went to another one for a second opinion and he said im in a very advanced state and its gonna get worse and that I dont have any new hairs at all and that whoever told me that was lying to me or they said that coz they love me. So from then I was distraught. Cant sleep, cant eat much, just cry all day long and wonder what to do. But after finding this site, it make me feel a bit better, especially when I see how many replies I got right after I sent in my first comment. That shows me that people DO care even if they dont know me.That helps me alot. So I want to thank you from my heart for listening to me and answering my comments
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Sonia...my heart is aching reading your words. I was absolutely where you are 3 years ago. I was crying all the time, and totally devastated.
I teach a very aerobic dance class (you can see a bit of it on one of my YouTubes). I tried wearing a scarf the first few times, but I get way too hot. Now I don't give a you know what who sees my bald head.
I got to this place by just taking tiny baby steps....I kept track of the first time I went to the mailbox bald, then the grocery store, then the library, then the gym.....you get the idea. After a short time, I stopped needing to keep track of it - this just became who I am. Believe me, I know how hard it is, but the liberation of just being who I am and getting on with life.
Mary
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