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Family members treating you different
I've had alopecia for a while now, but last year was the first time I had to wear a full on wig. After I got te wig, my parents called up the rest of our family (aunts, uncles, grandparents, etc. ), even though I didn't really want them to.
Right away, my family asked me for pictures of me in the wig, would tell me it looked nice and so on. I didn't really mind at first because I was so excited about getting the new wig.
However, soon my wig was all anyone could talk to me about. They would ask me a million questions about it and now whenever they talk to me, they don't even look at my face, just my hair.
Even when a family slept over my house, they kept asking me when I was going to take my wig off (I never take my wig off unless I'm just with my parents and brother). It was as if thy wanted to just see what I looked like bald.
Not to mention my younger cousin keeps asking me about my wig when we are out in public and doesn't say it very quietly. She tugs at the hair and keeps playing with it. Then, the other day I told her the hair was real hair and she pulled my hair up to check! Right in the middle of a restaurant.
I don't know whether I should say something to my family or not. I know they are just trying to be supported, but lately it just feels like they can't even look at me without thinking about my hair.
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Rose Marie' on
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Hi
It's ok to set boundaries around what you will let people do for and within this situation. Work out what you want people to treat you like then explain your needs to those that are behaving in ways that just aren't ok for you. This is something that you can control and have a right to work out for yourself. Start with your parents, making them fully understand your wants and needs around your alopecia and wig wearing, once you feel that they totally get you, they can then become your advocates with the rest of the family.
Rosy
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Permalink Reply by Moni on
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I feel you should DEFINATELY speak up. It is becoming rude and you shouldn't have to put up with it. I also feel they don't know they are being rude. So, go ahead and let them know. You should really talk to your parents first. Seems like they don't understand the concept of how to respect the situation. You should tell them to consider your input into information BEFORE they speak or share about it.
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